Surviving An Affair

Horsepower · #1 24-07-2005, 11:14 PM

I met a fren for dinner to catch-up. He is in the midst of saving his marriage after his wife found found he had an affair. He passed me a book on "Surviving An Affair" by Drs. Harley and Chalmers, and said he had just finished reading it and thought probably I would need it too. He is aware that I am in the midst of seeing some else too, and asked me not to play with fire.

Excerpts from the book :
"INFIDELITY is one of life's most painful experiences for everyone involved - the betrayed spouse, the children, the extended family members, and even the lover and wayward spouse. So why do people have affairs when they create such sadness ? And once trust is broken, how can a couple ever hope to reconcile ?"

The book basically has 4 main points :

a. why affairs begin and end
b. how to end an affair
c. how to restore the marriage after an affair
d. how to manage resentment and build trust

I will start reading the book. I thought this is a good topic to start a new thread as I can tell from some posts some brudders are divorced because of affairs, go bonking away to numb their unhappy marriage, or got found out for involvement in affairs.

Cheers !

[/list]

sToNeCoLd · #2 24-07-2005, 11:21 PM

Bro, appreciated tat. Good constructive post and a good forewarning to ppl like me!!

sToneColD

Horsepower · #3 24-07-2005, 11:24 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by sToNeCoLd

Bro, appreciated tat. Good constructive post and a good forewarning to ppl like me!!

sToneColD

Up me lor

Leave your name and I'll up you back.

oaoo · #4 24-07-2005, 11:25 PM

Just be careful not to read the book at home!!!

sToNeCoLd · #5 24-07-2005, 11:32 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Horsepower

Up me lor

Leave your name and I'll up you back.

Bro, honestly I still dont know how to "Up" someone be it "clicking" on some icon or what???Secondly, I also dont know what's the benefit of these points for despite of my presence here in SB for sometime..

Points redemption???

Pls enlighten me.

sToNecOlD

Horsepower · #6 24-07-2005, 11:53 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by sToNeCoLd

[COLOR=Red]Bro, honestly I still dont know how to "Up" someone be it "clicking" on some icon or what???Secondly, I also dont know what's the benefit of these points for despite of my presence here in SB for sometime..

Points redemption???

The points can go Shell petrol kiosk redeem merchandise, may Durex Featherlite...

sToNeCoLd · #7 25-07-2005, 12:09 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Horsepower

The points can go Shell petrol kiosk redeem merchandise, may Durex Featherlite...

Hahaha...Well said!!Can save tons of $$$ if really SB moderator exercise that!!!

sToneCOlD

HuiGe3387 · #8 25-07-2005, 07:59 AM

Good reminder for a start for the new week.

sbfpolis · #9 25-07-2005, 08:07 AM

Bro HP, does the book talk about cheonging, and the OC discover it ?

songsong1213 · #10 25-07-2005, 09:54 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by oaoo

Just be careful not to read the book at home!!!

How if spotted OC reading this book

malayboy · #11 25-07-2005, 02:20 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Horsepower

The book basically has 4 main points :

a. why affairs begin and end
b. how to end an affair
c. how to restore the marriage after an affair
d. how to manage resentment and build trust

[/list]

Actually, it would have been better if the book addresses the following points:
a. How to manage an affair
b. How not to be discovered while having an affair
c. 100 lies for covering up an affair

I have had several affairs and, thank goodness, have yet to be discovered. Having said that, it would be good if we could pick up a few more tricks along the way.

hunter89 · #12 25-07-2005, 03:02 PM

It is a good tread and a good reminder...... but somehow the lil bro always get the better control and ended starting to have another affair......sianz......

ken_v2 · #13 25-07-2005, 04:43 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by malayboy

Actually, it would have been better if the book addresses the following points:
a. How to manage an affair
b. How not to be discovered while having an affair
c. 100 lies for covering up an affair

I have had several affairs and, thank goodness, have yet to be discovered. Having said that, it would be good if we could pick up a few more tricks along the way.

i totally agreed with you. maybe some brudders can write a book on this points

Horsepower · #14 25-07-2005, 10:54 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by malayboy

Actually, it would have been better if the book addresses the following points:
a. How to manage an affair
b. How not to be discovered while having an affair
c. 100 lies for covering up an affair

I have had several affairs and, thank goodness, have yet to be discovered. Having said that, it would be good if we could pick up a few more tricks along the way.

The diff is before and aftermath of the incident.

evo3 · #15 26-07-2005, 05:13 AM

Bro Horsepower is that book available in MPH or Times