Ruler Loong performing retail politics to hookwink peasants

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An honorable member of the Coffee Shop Has Just Posted the Following:

Transmodified from http://www.channelnewsasia.com/news/...ng/798372.html

PEASANTPORE: The strong community spirit present in kampongs but destroyed by Old Autocrat should never be maintained today. What is good for Peasantpore is bad for Familee and vice versa. Ruler Loong made these comments at a book launch to thank peasants former residents of Kampong Radin Mas for giving up their land and moving to bird cages.

Kampong Radin Mas is believed to be among the oldest villages in Peasantpore sitting on prime land. While the regime has not dared to challenge the Northern Mats for the cemetery, it has forced many Radin Mas peasants to sell their land on the cheap for 'national service'.

While it was the birth place to many Malay-Muslim institutions, Ruler Loong said it also produced leaders whose important contributions in politics is to recognize the Old Autocrat as the Maha-Raja of Peasantpore.

He said: "How did Radin Mas produce so many 'talented people' who pledged loyalty to Maha Raja LKY? Hey, dun believe the stupid old wives tales lah, spring water, cow dung. More ridiculous some Paul Lumpars claimed the 'colours and activities' of the old kampong.

"But everybody agrees that the in an Asiatic society, Asiatics are very good at sizing up who the potential Maha Raja and applying a good dose of 'por lumpar' or flipping pratas to make the Ruler happy.

"Well then, Marboro Tan's HDB encourage everyone to be selfish lah, everyone allow dogs to poo and urinate outside their bird cages but not in their house? What gotong royo? You think mee-siam no mussels?"

The book, called "A Village Dispersed for Profits: Kampong Radin Mas 1800s To 1973", which was launched by Ruler Loong, documents life in the Radin Mas village before it was demolished for profits. Numerous peasants were told to fuck off with ceremonial compensations and packed to bird cages. The regime amassed huge profits by building numerous commercial, private and public housing projects since 1973.

Peasantpore's former Minion of Social Obedience, Othman Wok, said: "Hee hee, you all think Prata Nathan very original hor, but how about me? Old Autocrat distrusted many of his former comrades and eventually demonized or retire most of them and I am one of those marked to stay? If you say Prata Nathan's prata flipping good, then my satay smoking skills lagi better right?

"Today this Ruler Loong very funny, after building concrete jungles and expensive bird cages, now he says he want to get back the community spirit. He really think local peasants are dimwits. After Bargain Hen presided over the great foreign talent import buffet, things can stay the same meh?

Dr Yakult, Minion for Miscommunications and Information Confusion, chipped in to offer his earnest views: "Wok a bit senile liao, so I paraphrase lor. If Ruler Loong say want to gotong royo, then as loyal minions, no matter how we think the idea stupid, still must smile, tremble and obey. So the right thing to say now is 'I think this is something for us to think about as we go forward, as we build the new Peasantpore.'

"This one, I think Ah Khaw answer best lah. Sometimes I think, we can build communities, only money is the problem, if Ho Jinx and Old Autocrat never bail out Citibank and UBS, KNNCCB, we can build a Disney Land in Geylang lor.

"It is nice to build nice buildings, thanks to the selfish meritocratic policies, you think peasants interested to help each another? Sometimes we know Ruler Loong say the queer things but too bad, he is the Maha Raja now, no matter how dumbo he sounds, must still do the Asiatic thing and give him some face lor."

The book is based on the regime's historical documents and 'approved interviews' with former and current peasants. Obviously nobody will be asking for compensation for the land stolen in 1973.


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