Need some advise...

sentinel81 · #1 18-03-2012, 10:08 PM

I don't know who to ask...but i have this thing happening at my workplace..

There is this girl at another team in my office who has grown closer to me. I know she has a boyfriend..but it seems like she hardly goes out with him..

it all starts from the occasional buying of morning coffee and bread for her...then she starts to buy for me...when i don't go out for lunch, she will then watsapp me askign if i need any food...then she will just come by my desk and pass me some bread...

after that, she starts asking me to accompany her when she needed to buy something...i mean..she has a boyfriend right? why need me...but..since i enjoyed her company...i agreed...and accompanied her..

then we watched the movies...and when her dad does not cook for her and she does not have any lessons (she is taking part time degree) she will ask me out for dinner after work...(again..she shld ask her bf to accompany right?)

there was even once she asked me to apply for another job within the organisation ..and she will do the same so that we can be in teh same building..when i asked why...she said "it will make me happier..then we can lunch everyday together also"....

i mean...if you guys are in my situation..what will you do? i feel like i have the thing for her..but women are pretty weird..that they go close to a guy..but suddenly treat as friends only...

and now i am going for reservist..she is like a gf..asking me which camp..and again asked me for dinner during the week coz she does not have any school..
i told her of a new food place few days back and she asked me many things about it..then when i told her she shld bring her bf there..she just nvr replied to my message....so now...she ask me if can go dinner with her this coming week..and at the place which i mentioned...

should i just go with the flow?....or put it to stop...i m enjoying her company though.... haiyaaa

sinner1234 · #2 19-03-2012, 08:52 AM

Dear bro sentinel81,

Imho,based on wht u had provided, go for it as you like her company and she likes yrs also. She seems quite responsive to you at work but wht abt privately...... i mean when you guys are not working, do you sms each other too?
If not, she may just treat you as a "get along well" male colleague during working time.

She may be looking out for another guy in her life.
You will know wht happened if you popped the question of asking her to be yr grl but
No hurry, get to noe her more to see if you guys are suitable.

I wish you all the best.

Xgenre · #3 19-03-2012, 09:16 AM

She might just be a girl who doesn't like to be lonely. Such girls hang onto whoever they can find so that they won't be alone. So hanging out with you during lunch or during the times her bf isn't free isn't that big a deal. I'm sure she likes you as a friend, like how you like her back too but liking a friend is different from loving someone.

Has she done anything to indicate she wants more than friendship with you? I feel for such girls, if you want to proceed beyond friendship, the initiative must come from her. If you ask her to leave her bf for you, you will always be seen as the guy who broke them up. She might leave you for other guys in future too. If it's her choice to leave him for you, she will tell herself that she has chosen you and in bad times, she will remind herself she has chosen you. For some reason, girls might bemore willing to stay put in the new relationship when times are bad.

Why not ask her why she loves her bf, what are his strengths etc? Let her answer you. If she complains a lot, then ask her why she is still with him? Never ask her to be with you when you are asking such questions though.

wishy51 · #4 19-03-2012, 09:56 AM

Bro.. I got the same experience once also.. She attached and got closed to me but the thing is she just want someone to accompany her as her bf is always "busy".. Everytime when u mentioned about her bf she will ignore 'coz she still want her bf & we are only "usable" during those available times.. Try asking her out during weekends & maybe u'll understand wat i meant.. =)

Ichigo_Kurosaki · #5 19-03-2012, 10:04 AM

The thread title should be: Need some advice cos 'Advice' is a noun and 'Advise' is a verb.
Advise: To take counsel; to consult; - as like - You were advised of the risk with this colleague.
Advice: An opinion recommended or offered, as worthy to be followed (But hardly ever followed as with all such past threads).

Quote:

Originally Posted by sentinel81

.....should i just go with the flow?....or put it to stop... i m enjoying her company though....

So what's your problem?

As with such past threads, don't bluff yourself, go with her flow, enjoy the moment and hope for possible advancement in this relationship.

LazyCat · #6 19-03-2012, 03:18 PM

If you are not married, if you good feeling about her, then go with the flow.

What she do about her BF is her issue. As long as she is not married, then there is no
conflict. Carry on bro.

IMHO. Cheers!

RealEstateGuy · #7 19-03-2012, 04:06 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by LazyCat

If you are not married, if you good feeling about her, then go with the flow.

What she do about her BF is her issue. As long as she is not married, then there is no
conflict. Carry on bro.

IMHO. Cheers!

Exactly Braddah. Braddah, thats why the TS should take your GF to a hotel during lunch and fuck her hard Braddah. Till she scream in orgasm and forgot you completely Bradddah.

likashing · #8 19-03-2012, 04:15 PM

Wow, the boss appointed you to be his asst school teacher or u just like to copy his style?

Quote:

Originally Posted by Ichigo_Kurosaki

The thread title should be: Need some advice cos 'Advice' is a noun and 'Advise' is a verb.
Advise: To take counsel; to consult; - as like - You were advised of the risk with this colleague.
Advice: An opinion recommended or offered, as worthy to be followed (But hardly ever followed as with all such past threads).

Anyway back to topic.
Maybe she just wants a lunch buddy at work? (happened to me before)
Maybe she likes you as a "brother"?
Maybe she has problems with her bf and thinking of changing?
Maybe she is 2-timing?
So many maybe's... but u will never get the answer here on this Forum.
Just ask her!

Ichigo_Kurosaki · #9 19-03-2012, 05:17 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by likashing

Wow, the boss appointed you to be his asst school teacher or u just like to copy his style?

He's on MC today

hotstuffm8 · #10 19-03-2012, 09:17 PM

trolololol

HCKing · #11 19-03-2012, 10:25 PM

there's a possibility she is giving u chance, so dun ask and talk abt her bf when u r with her. could be she is having a difficult r/s and trying to find a 'better one' 1st b4 making up her mind to break it off. if u really gt the feel for her try dropping some hint on yr next date and see if there's any positive response frm her side. gt nothing to lose anyway.

BookOut · #12 19-03-2012, 10:47 PM

simple way to test her. tell her u cannot go dinner with her cos another girl alrady ask u 1st and u alrady agree, then see whether she jealous or not. Yes = got chance. No = squeze lampar.

sentinel81 · #13 19-03-2012, 11:07 PM

thanks for the replies...sorry for the "advice" in the title instead of "advise"..haha..

how i know that she does not go out with her bf often? coz whenever she tells me she is going out..it will always be with her bff (a girl btw)....and she will tell me she is going out...on other weekends..she will tell me she is at school and on sundays..with her bff or at home...and yah..she messages me a lot outside of office time...(the power of whatsapp)....

from the responses i get here...i guess i will just go with the flow..and yea..i am not married..

pussinboots97 · #14 20-03-2012, 03:12 AM

You can give it a shot just to satisfy yourself that you have no chance but at least you tried.

Ichigo_Kurosaki · #15 20-03-2012, 10:00 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by sentinel81

thanks for the replies...sorry for the "advice" in the title instead of "advise"..haha..

how i know that she does not go out with her bf often? coz whenever she tells me she is going out..it will always be with her bff (a girl btw)....and she will tell me she is going out...on other weekends..she will tell me she is at school and on sundays..with her bff or at home...and yah..she messages me a lot outside of office time...(the power of whatsapp)....

from the responses i get here...i guess i will just go with the flow..and yea..i am not married..

Go with it but no need to probe on anti-climatic boyfriend related matters cos she might mistaken that you are judging her. If she wanna tell you, she will when the time is right. "Friends with benefits" is halfway inside your pocket already

Date her out after office hours, slowly test water...Don't dive..

Also no need to reply all her messages like clockwork as like a pet. Once a while hang her a bit, make her miss you cos no need to offer this type of "wanting best of both worlds" cai every bit and piece as per request