what would u do if u found out that ur gf has been cheating on you?

[Smaashfoo]

As per the title.. what would u do if u found out that ur gf has been sleeping with another guy? If both of you have been together for v long? Would you forgive her?

[DemonicSS]

2 options are present for you:

1) Just treat it simply that you both are incompatible and move on.

2) She's cheating on you normally means that she finds something that you are lacking (not just in terms of your sexuality) or because of it feels insecure because of it. So find out what is it that she feels lacking and see if you want to, or have the ability to cover what she lacks.

P.S, if you are a kid or have not started your career, then only option 1 is available to you.

Cheers

[ohmygod555]

Definitely not. She will definitely do it again.. Why give yourself the chance to get hurt one more time? Now havn't married already like that, can you imagine how it would be after marriage? Furthermore, imagine catching her chat on you again after marriage and you decide to divorce. You still have to pay alimony, if got children, they will suffer. Move on bro.

[LTAHorny]

I totally understand that ache that you are going thru right now. Why? I went thru the same thing just a few weeks ago.

Been together for 4 years and found out that I was cheated on. Been told it was a fling but I never believed.

If you are a student - Move on. I know it is hard. More to come.

Otherwise, have a real conversation - No holding back. But this does not mean to trash her and scold her. Find out why she did it - Maybe it was your fault too? Not spending enough time with her?

But if you decide to forgive her and move on, you really have to move on. No such thing as in the future using this as an excuse for argument.

[happpy]

As per the title.. what would u do if u found out that ur gf has been sleeping with another guy? If both of you have been together for v long? Would you forgive her?

for me, i will choose to ignore her till silent breakup and move on.


is not about how long u spend with each other. sometime u just have to learn how to let go.

i can accept men cheat but i just cannot accept women cheating hahahhaah

:D

[BiRd13]

I will have dump her and move on to other for sure.
Perhaps I'm one of those guy that can't tolerate partner for cheating... But me myself can... :)

[SiliconVibrator]

breakup n move on ba..... as some bros here have highlight, if she can cheat once, she will cheat twice or even more time.

[Rockstar10]

No No for me...if u are still young...let it go and move on...theres still alot of galz out there...its just a matter of time....mean wile go and screw up gals out there and remain single first...hehehe:D

[reflexk]

I totally understand that ache that you are going thru right now. Why? I went thru the same thing just a few weeks ago.

Been together for 4 years and found out that I was cheated on. Been told it was a fling but I never believed.

If you are a student - Move on. I know it is hard. More to come.

Otherwise, have a real conversation - No holding back. But this does not mean to trash her and scold her. Find out why she did it - Maybe it was your fault too? Not spending enough time with her?

But if you decide to forgive her and move on, you really have to move on. No such thing as in the future using this as an excuse for argument.

The honorable thing for her to do is to just break up and then sleep with whoever she wants, especially when the couple is not married and there aren't many things holding her back from a break-up.
You should also see whether it was a moment of weakness or whether it was premeditated. The law treats the two differently, and for a good reason. I would have a very high tolerance for a drunken ONS, but would find it very hard to accept cheating with premeditation.
Why did I say that - my gf of 4.5 years had cheated on me (physical+emotional) two times, with two different guys. This happened more than an year ago. I knew the emotional part and forgave her quite easily. Only recently did I know that it was physical too, and with a lot of premeditation. She has changed quite a lot now, and I am also at crossroads. It is not easy to let go. I am 30 btw.

[Trakker1977]

Bro, it is really up to you. Cause we are not you and can only give you on how we think. If you really choose to forgive her, it must be a "true" forgive and locked away in an unopened safe. Never to bring it up again and any circumstances.

But for me personally, I will not forgive my GF if she does that with a sound mind. This is what I believe:

1) When single, you can have all the flings you want.

2) But when in a relationship, I believe both guy and girl should remain faithful to each other. Cause if not faithful now, how do you expect to be faithful in marriage?

3) If due to druken state, I might choose to forgive but never if her mind is clear.


What "lust blow over my head" is all crap to me. My first GF said that to me and I dump her straight and replied "you loved lust over me",

[IwantbustyKim]

Ask for Anal as compensation. TheN dump her after that.

[joncheong]

i will just act blur but deep down...that's it...i won't treat her as gf anymore...just as a fb until she knows that i have found out then clean break...

Just continue banging her la and find a new gf who deserve your love....when banging her, treat her as a pros/fl...dun need to care about whether she song or not...just ram and release make sure you song...

[pyrokinets]

Ask for Anal as compensation. TheN dump her after that.

LOL, bro... I almost burst out laughing in mid-drink when I read that.

[niel]

It is never easy if you are so in love with your gf.

But being rationale is extremely vy important especially you know that no matter what happen, there will be cracks in the relationship. It will never be the same.

I used to have the same situations twice, 2 different gfs. I realised when it happens, you will lose all trust and trust is the biggest element in any relationship.

Therefore u really need to wise up and be fair to your self. Forgiving is easy but forgetting is tough. Don put our life misery on a assumption that this gf is going to be your life partner.........

[deputy]

So do you expect your girl to forgive you if she finds that you have been cheating?

[LovePotion]

i think if u really like her perhaps u could forgive her once.. but if it happen the second time... thats it for her

[loneyheart]

can forgive BUT cannot forget ... so do u want to carry on w her in yr live

[TaylorMade]

i will just act blur but deep down...that's it...i won't treat her as gf anymore...just as a fb until she knows that i have found out then clean break...

Just continue banging her la and find a new gf who deserve your love....when banging her, treat her as a pros/fl...dun need to care about whether she song or not...just ram and release make sure you song...

I like your method best!!!!:D

[Townsend]

As per the title.. what would u do if u found out that ur gf has been sleeping with another guy? If both of you have been together for v long? Would you forgive her?

I will not forgive her.

Trust is like a Chinese Vase, Once it is Broken, it can be mended but it will never look the same again !

[Raisin]

i will just act blur but deep down...that's it...i won't treat her as gf anymore...just as a fb until she knows that i have found out then clean break...

Just continue banging her la and find a new gf who deserve your love....when banging her, treat her as a pros/fl...dun need to care about whether she song or not...just ram and release make sure you song...
You are right. Gather some evidence first. Then treat her like FB purely. Whack her song song. Whack hard. Ride like there is no tomorrow.

In the meantime, find a true love. Just when the FB wants to get married, show her the evidence and call it off. Show her parents too.

[doubletap]

dear TS,

I read yr post (as well as all others' replies) w much tears in my heart now. I had a 9year relationship w a divorcee, n she broke off w me 5 yrs ago, to be w another man. only to be reunited w me 2 mths later.

then 4 years ago, I broke her up to be w another woman, but only to patch back w her after 4 mths. then things were well till tis year cny, she left me again w another man. only to returned to me 2 mths later. n she admitted she slept nights out having sex w tat man a few occasions. I loved her too much. I forgave her, n we patched back 3 mths ago.

3 weeks ago, she broke up w me again. leaving a lot of pain in my heart. dunno whether she had a man anot, but her actions (being so many yrs w her) n timings show tat she s seeing another man now.

my heart s dying soon, very very soon. I m very very tired alr. I know I cant give her anything except money. I cant give her marriage cos I m married too. but these 9 yrs are too much for me to bear.

I m not doing any stupid things now, but trying to fix back my family whom I had neglected over tis decade. it's hard, it's tiring. I wanna tell her: dun call or msg me anymore. I really dun wanna take in "used-goods" again, while my wife s a virgin when we married. but my heart pains......... really very pain......... good friends advised me (as brothers in tis thread) to let go.

saying is easy, especially when 3rd parties have clearer minds, but it s damned hard to walk tis road, esp when my whole lifestyle timetable have to be readjusted.

I ve been refraining very hard to write in sbf.....

[Sirrus]

just turn her into a fuck buddy and screw her like a slut that she so deserve.just meet up fuck then go home. simple no romance needed

[DemonicSS]

Actually go for counseling session might be better bro?:o

I find the counseling system in Singapore is in its fledgling state. They dun help couples in need to accept the other party for who they are. They would only be recommended for people who do not have friends to talk to or confide with. Other than that, they dun do much. Personal belief is that they are under the direction by higher up to prevent couples from breaking off.

[Annabelle93]

As per the title.. what would u do if u found out that ur gf has been sleeping with another guy? If both of you have been together for v long? Would you forgive her?

Is up to each individual decision. for me, my ex had cheated on me and bedded with girls. Even if i forgive him, i have no guarantee that he will not do it again even how he swear or promised... for my advice to u is to move on. im sure u can find a better one. :)

[gotnotime]

Happened to me during my ns days too. But ts, you gotta let her go and be prepared for the fact that she might really leave you.

[bloggert]

It is probably worth remembering that being in a BF/GF relationship is not quite the same as being married. The whole point, I suppose, is that you can get to know each other well enough to see if you really want to make it into a long term relationship like marriage.

If it should turn out that it doesn't work out, that is if the BF or the GF decides that they want something else, the best thing to do is to be honest about it - deal with the issues, and be glad that you didn't discover this after getting married.

Notwithstanding all the emotional investment into a BF/GF relationship, honest communications is usually the best policy. If the GF prefers someone else, she should have just said so rather than trying to have both. Likewise the BF, if you are unhappy with the GF because of something she's done, tell her so - perhaps that is the conclusion of your test relationship with her. You learnt something about yourself and your GF, and hopefully she does too.

A lot of people cannot confront the hard facts because they have too much invested and are afraid of losing it, even when it is not worth hanging on to. In conclusion:-

1. accept the possibility that she may not be the one
2. remember that you two aren't married yet, and be glad about it
3. know that there will be others out there, who could well be better for you
4. learn as many lessons as you can from it
5. don't be desperate for her, you don't need her - don't act out of fear of loss
6. have a talk with your GF and decide what to do from there

[AirBust]

Sad case...

Mine a few years ago wasnt even about her cheating 'yet'.

She told me she is catching a show with her group of colleagues and tickets have been bought already. Just an hr before her show, I met with an accident and had to go to hospital for outpatient treatment. Called her but she insisted that she cant go hospital to accompany me cos she already agreed to go watch movie with her colleagues.

That night I went to her house downstairs to wait for her. Only to find her coming home with a guy sending her home 'who wasnt a colleague' but someone who likes her. And fact is they went on a movie date, not with her group of colleagues.

End up she decided to leave me even though I forgave her..

Rest is history... Hurting.. but life still has to move on..

[coffeevan]

dear TS,

I read yr post (as well as all others' replies) w much tears in my heart now. I had a 9year relationship w a divorcee, n she broke off w me 5 yrs ago, to be w another man. only to be reunited w me 2 mths later.

then 4 years ago, I broke her up to be w another woman, but only to patch back w her after 4 mths. then things were well till tis year cny, she left me again w another man. only to returned to me 2 mths later. n she admitted she slept nights out having sex w tat man a few occasions. I loved her too much. I forgave her, n we patched back 3 mths ago.

3 weeks ago, she broke up w me again. leaving a lot of pain in my heart. dunno whether she had a man anot, but her actions (being so many yrs w her) n timings show tat she s seeing another man now.

my heart s dying soon, very very soon. I m very very tired alr. I know I cant give her anything except money. I cant give her marriage cos I m married too. but these 9 yrs are too much for me to bear.

I m not doing any stupid things now, but trying to fix back my family whom I had neglected over tis decade. it's hard, it's tiring. I wanna tell her: dun call or msg me anymore. I really dun wanna take in "used-goods" again, while my wife s a virgin when we married. but my heart pains......... really very pain......... good friends advised me (as brothers in tis thread) to let go.

saying is easy, especially when 3rd parties have clearer minds, but it s damned hard to walk tis road, esp when my whole lifestyle timetable have to be readjusted.

I ve been refraining very hard to write in sbf.....


Bro, I understand the feeling. It happened to me also. It sad, sometime people ask me how to love 2 girls when I only got 1 heart. I still don't know the answer until today.

The feeling sucks when I know her cheat on me, it sad. Letting it go is really hard. Take care bro.

[hunter]

bro doubletap.. its easy to adjust your time.. just spend it all with your wife and children.. Wife is a person who sacrifise for us.. no matter how we play outside.. never affect the relation with wife...

Your fb always play breakup with u, maybe she is looking for a richer person to hangon to..

Let go is the only help you can get..

p.s treat your wife better..



dear TS,

I read yr post (as well as all others' replies) w much tears in my heart now. I had a 9year relationship w a divorcee, n she broke off w me 5 yrs ago, to be w another man. only to be reunited w me 2 mths later.

then 4 years ago, I broke her up to be w another woman, but only to patch back w her after 4 mths. then things were well till tis year cny, she left me again w another man. only to returned to me 2 mths later. n she admitted she slept nights out having sex w tat man a few occasions. I loved her too much. I forgave her, n we patched back 3 mths ago.

3 weeks ago, she broke up w me again. leaving a lot of pain in my heart. dunno whether she had a man anot, but her actions (being so many yrs w her) n timings show tat she s seeing another man now.

my heart s dying soon, very very soon. I m very very tired alr. I know I cant give her anything except money. I cant give her marriage cos I m married too. but these 9 yrs are too much for me to bear.

I m not doing any stupid things now, but trying to fix back my family whom I had neglected over tis decade. it's hard, it's tiring. I wanna tell her: dun call or msg me anymore. I really dun wanna take in "used-goods" again, while my wife s a virgin when we married. but my heart pains......... really very pain......... good friends advised me (as brothers in tis thread) to let go.

saying is easy, especially when 3rd parties have clearer minds, but it s damned hard to walk tis road, esp when my whole lifestyle timetable have to be readjusted.

I ve been refraining very hard to write in sbf.....

[wells]

leave that gal ba...i know its hard but just do it if you feel like to.

During my NS time. Every day happily Q up for the 10cent phone..one day i'm so happy that i pass my SOC and wanted to tell her that i can book out for 3 weeks...but when i going to tell her she told me she can't talk as her bf is with her at her house..knn the 10cent phone nearly got smash by me.

anyway think it positive that this type of gal is not loyal and luckily expose.

[zlon]

my exp was my EX became a les thanks to a butch came into my relationship n destroy everything i have build for 3 yrs it was pain for me but i just had to stand up n carry on walking. nothing is forever.

[yy0202]

When im in a r/s, i will nv cheat or even visit pros, so i expect the same comitment, if she cheats, then i will cheat too, at the same time use her as much as possible till the final breakup.

Communication is impt, if ur partner is lacking of something, discuss n find solution. Cheating will not end good.

[doubletap]

hi all,

I m not trying to hijack TS in tis thread. but instead, I ve got comforting words from ppl from all walks of life. I APPRECIATE YR WORDS, GUYS.

it has been 7 pure mths. it's really controlling myself not to write more here. I dunno how to input ficticious words, but really wish to write... in order for my heart to rest better. but I know if I write more, I will be recognized further.

how I wish there s anything online or other means, for me to write abt it. in my heart, I always wanna pen down a lot of things tats in my heart. not hoping tat she read abt it, which she dun read anything off or online at all....... but to write down is to bring relief to my heart.

my frds have been good to be tat they ve been listenting to me. I dun wanna keep bothering them abt e same fact over n over again. I aso dun wish to meet someone here nice enuf to offer time to me, then repeat all over n over again....

tks all for yr kind words. appreciated!

[DemonicSS]

my exp was my EX became a les thanks to a butch came into my relationship n destroy everything i have build for 3 yrs it was pain for me but i just had to stand up n carry on walking. nothing is forever.

Personally, this is one of the worst scenarios that could ever happen to a relationship. I mean, if your partner went with another guy, you could concede and claim that he might be a more suitable match for her, he's a better guy than me etc... but to the same sex as her? It's like in a soccer match, where your opponent unveils a cannon, loads up a ball and takes aim at your goal.

[obeyyodude]

you can change your relationship, ask her to be your fb instead if she likes sex that much? like this you will be free, but retain benefits :D

[Alf1977]

Cheat 2x back behind her back ... An eye for an eye .. At least you won't look like a loser

[scottshin]

As per the title.. what would u do if u found out that ur gf has been sleeping with another guy? If both of you have been together for v long? Would you forgive her?

This has been discussed to death. There's no way you can forgive her because it's how men are designed. We are territorial creatures and women are part of our "properties". When a woman cheats, she has thought about this for many many times before she does it. Therefore, it serves you no purpose in keeping her as she already made up her mind that you're worth losing over the other guy. No amount of remorse can make up to that. Thus I would say it is a futile attempt to keep a woman who subconsciously no longer wants you, or rather who pines over another guy more than you. Even if she tracks back and says how sorry she is, the line has been crossed and as a man you will need to take tough decision. This is where your mettle is proven. If you accept her back, you will be seen as weak in her eyes (consciously or subconsciously). There's no way of getting around it. If you don't accept her back, cut all contacts, and move on, you will be seen as A MAN. I believe you know what to do and you just need validation from other forum members. All the best and take care.

[freefuck]

If ur gf cheat u, u cheat back. In this society , it common that couple cheat one another, it just a matter of who cheat first.

[scottshin]

If ur gf cheat u, u cheat back. In this society , it common that couple cheat one another, it just a matter of who cheat first.

Like kids, yo. You scratch my back, I scratch yours. Quid pro quo, motherfxxker.

[HappyOwl]

As per the title.. what would u do if u found out that ur gf has been sleeping with another guy? If both of you have been together for v long? Would you forgive her?

Bro. Smaashfoo, I will forgive her. :)

Based on my personal experiences, it is very important to find out exactly why it happened this way. What is the root cause that resulted in such a state before calling the relationship off. So I can be a better man whom my next girlfriend would be very very proud of.

1) A high number of guys turned violent ended up facing the walls in cell because you can't escape from the law. They then regretted their actions being too silly but it was also too late.

2) A high number of guys turned emotional ended up drunken on the streets, pubs, clubs, etc... but it will not change the facts that a fact is still a fact.

3) I choose to respect the decision made by a lady. I would really hope they could be more courageous to come up to me to express themselves clearly so we can still be friends/ friends with no benefits. :)

[Smaashfoo]

Thanks to everyone here that have replyed to my question. There is a number of touching responses which i could relate to. My situation is a slightly different one though. I am e guy which e ger cheated with. The ger joined the company which I was at about a year ago. She is attached to her bf for about 7 years. The ger and I hit it off very well from the on set.. and it wasnt long before we became physically intimate. She is not able to reject e advances, but after each session of physical intimacy, she would be v unhappy and sad. We continued this for several months till after one night of vigourous activity, she felt so guilty that she decided not to talk to me anymore. We still see each other everyday at work though we hardly acknowledge each other. Recently, she started being very close to a married colleague, like how we used to be. I guess I am quite sore and jealous that I have lost her as a close friend and now that soreness has turned to anger. What should I do? Suck it up like a man or tell her bf about her infidelity? Sorry if I come across like I am a real jerk.. but I guess im just after all a human with weaknesses..

[DemonicSS]

Thanks to everyone here that have replyed to my question. There is a number of touching responses which i could relate to. My situation is a slightly different one though. I am e guy which e ger cheated with. The ger joined the company which I was at about a year ago. She is attached to her bf for about 7 years. The ger and I hit it off very well from the on set.. and it wasnt long before we became physically intimate. She is not able to reject e advances, but after each session of physical intimacy, she would be v unhappy and sad. We continued this for several months till after one night of vigourous activity, she felt so guilty that she decided not to talk to me anymore. We still see each other everyday at work though we hardly acknowledge each other. Recently, she started being very close to a married colleague, like how we used to be. I guess I am quite sore and jealous that I have lost her as a close friend and now that soreness has turned to anger. What should I do? Suck it up like a man or tell her bf about her infidelity? Sorry if I come across like I am a real jerk.. but I guess im just after all a human with weaknesses..

Oh, move on already dude, while I pity her, she kinda is the type that will always stay in her own cycle of death - Always unhappy and sad. If you like, you can wait for her when she's single again, though it would be advisable to know "how" she became single before doing anything else.

[DemonicSS]

If ur gf cheat u, u cheat back. In this society , it common that couple cheat one another, it just a matter of who cheat first.

Society is based on how everyone works and treats each other and ultimately, it is up to you the individual that decides if you want the world to be a better place or worse.

[Smaashfoo]

Thanks. I am really quite heartened to know that there is so much wisdom in what is essentially a sex forum. Thanks to all for ur comments.mayb.. I shld start narrating my story one day.. haha

[HappyOwl]

Thanks to everyone here that have replyed to my question. There is a number of touching responses which i could relate to. My situation is a slightly different one though. I am e guy which e ger cheated with. The ger joined the company which I was at about a year ago. She is attached to her bf for about 7 years. The ger and I hit it off very well from the on set.. and it wasnt long before we became physically intimate. She is not able to reject e advances, but after each session of physical intimacy, she would be v unhappy and sad. We continued this for several months till after one night of vigourous activity, she felt so guilty that she decided not to talk to me anymore. We still see each other everyday at work though we hardly acknowledge each other. Recently, she started being very close to a married colleague, like how we used to be. I guess I am quite sore and jealous that I have lost her as a close friend and now that soreness has turned to anger. What should I do? Suck it up like a man or tell her bf about her infidelity? Sorry if I come across like I am a real jerk.. but I guess im just after all a human with weaknesses..

We seems to have a similar but different episode in our love tales.

I used to fall head over heels over a lady who is a true beauty. There were so many guys mesmerized by her beauty. There were Mercs, BMW, Lexus queuing to drive her home, to work, to shop but she was dating me. ME? :o

As our relationship got deeper, she asked me to take leave so we could go oversea for a 'us' time. My mind said please book the air tickets fast but my heart said please think again. To cut the story short, I was secretly told that she was already married with children but her intention was not to reveal anything about it and her hubby was hidden in the dark as well. Imagine if her hubby found out about us, is it going to be me? ME AGAIN:confused:

My heart sank of course. Am I feeling sore? Yes, of course. Am I angry? Yes, of course again. Did she felt guilty? Definitely not. She still dates my colleague. So, should I do anything? Definitely not again. I should Thank her for the valuable lesson crafted in my life instead. At least, I learned to be smarter and stronger when it comes to 'Matters Of The Heart.' :)

[freefuck]

Like kids, yo. You scratch my back, I scratch yours. Quid pro quo, motherfxxker.

U like to fuck ur own mother?