Need advice on Sour marriage life..

[khoon1]

Originally Posted by topcook1

Saw she has a solicitor name card in her cupboard..Guess she is going to fire her first salvo soon.. Btw does divorce take three years to proceed if I dont acknowledge or agree to it?Can anyone advice?

Must get PI to get caught her evidence in 1st place ,Once you got all evidence you win custody chance is much easy andhigher and dont need pay in court fee oso to her any fee in future ....for affair matters ,dont need three years at all ,its immed ...and only PI can attack with the strong prove in court and court listen to PI more than you ! vailed evidence can only last not more than 2 year .
Just get the evidence 1st can pay PI company in later part .....
if you miss this is going more more fee in later part .. dont wait .....even lisbian aso can be done in court ...

[Ichigo_Kurosaki]

Originally Posted by Ichigo_Kurosaki

Note this down.

It might comes in handy in your custody battle.

Let her go to as many such trips as possible (this could be a good opportunity to collect evidence of her infidelity).

Start taking notes of all these tiny nitty stuffs especially with kids matters.

You must be ready to enter the battle with a determined, cold and hardened heart, leave no stone unturned to accomplish your mission.

Lastly, go get a job

Bro topcook1, I posted above on 23-12-2011, 08:55 AM.

Collect Evidence & Seek Legal Advice Prepare For Battle She do 初一 You do 十五. No Need To Heart Soft

[newyorker88]

Originally Posted by topcook1

Saw she has a solicitor name card in her cupboard..Guess she is going to fire her first salvo soon.. Btw does divorce take three years to proceed if I dont acknowledge or agree to it?Can anyone advice?

After seperation of 3 years, both parties can call it quits. If remember correctly.

Have you tried marriage counselling? Marriage breaks down becos of miscommunications. if both parties dont get their message across to each other, then both party dont understand each other, and that is the begining of the trouble.

Message must flow between 2 parties, even if it is quarrels or calm talk. it is the understanding of both parties that will get things moving.

Both your children are still very young and what you are going thru will have an adverse effect on them, and probably their future martial relationship as well. Key to solving your problems is communication, be it thru a 3rd party or direct communication.

Hope all goes well for you.

[S.B.Y.1]

bRUR topcook1

Hope this thread by bRuR Big Sexy helps in some ways

http://sbfsg.agency/showthread....761&highlight=

[silkypussy]

Dear Threadstarter.

I feel sorry for you when I read your thread and posts. Let me try to help you by giving you a women's perspective.

I won't be preaching to you about your wife's behaviour. It's clear to me she has already moved on to a future which DO NOT have you in it. Believe me. I am a woman and I know how a woman thinks.

Her last action on credit card spending is to make you suffer and to force you to initiate the divorce. So please don't fall into her trap. I know us women are crafty and can be a real bitch.

Women's charter (although I know it is archaic and was set up initially to protect women from bastard husbands - and regrettably has been abused by bitchy women hanging their husbands to dry) is PRO-Women. So you better remember that.

To have a good defense against Women;s Charter and to pre-empt your wife from taking advantage, you need to seize the advantage now.

Dont initiate Divorce. If Men initiate Divorce, YOU WILL BE SEEN BY THE COURT that you are the one instigating the action and the Wife is the poor victim. So you already LOSE that advantage.

Collect Proof if you suspect your wife is having an affair.

Too bad that you just found a job. If you were unemployed, you would be given relief by the court as you have no money. Now you are probably screwed. So please be prepared to battle out for a 50:50 split of matrimonial assets.

Your wife wants custody of the kids, because she can CLAIM against you Alimony payments to take care of the kids. And the worst part is, you are at the losing end. You end up paying for the kids's expenses and growing up.
Later when you are old and feeble, you are left alone. The kids growing up with the mother will take care of her and not YOU, even though it was your money who had helped them to grow up.

Its too bad, and it sucks, but thats women charter for you. I know it sucks for men. If you men feel it is unfair, then fight dirty and get proof so that you can win and gain advantage.

Remember, the court (no matter what..) will always doubt the Initiator of the Divorce and especially the men is on the losing end. So plan your action and be smart about it.

Hire a lawyer to help you scheme and plan back.

Good Luck TS... Your first mistake is that you allowed your Mother In Law to live in with you.. You married your wife and not your mother in law.

You should have kicked her out in the first place and push her to your wife's sibling...

[maxpee88]

Dear Bro

I agree with SilkyPussy post. Its too bad for you and I also feel sorry for you.

You need to be strong to fight. I suggest you take the next few years since some one said that if you live separately for 3 years you can be granted a divorce.

So you better start planning now. Everytime you talk to your wife. record the conversation so that you can prove that you have done your part to make it work and she is the devil.

My marriage almost became like yours. I have a CHOW CHEE BYE Mother In Law.

Already before getting married, she already try to ask for many things - I told my mother in law that I am marrying her daughter and she is NOT selling her daughter off like some asset. KNN, my mother in law tried to demand big dowry, I just told her to FUCKED Off.

My wife was of course upset.. so I told her to choose : Make your mother happy and then I won't be marrying you, or make me happy.

My wife also LAN LAN... Sometimes you have be a BASTARD lor. No choice.

After married, my mother in law tried to instigate and stir shit. I already own an apartment, but my wife name is not in it. My mother in law insisted to my wife that we should 'invest' and buy another apartment together.

But her version and intepretation is that I will be the ROBERT and pay 100% for the apartment, including Downpayment, and installments and housing loan. Really CCB mother in law.

I told my wife off and said, I am not printing money. Already, I pay for 100% of the household bills and expenses, and I allow her to continue to give allownace back to her mom even though we are not living with her mom and she has other siblings.

Everytime we go and makan with her family, I pay for makan. Her father birthday, her mother birthday, I ROBERT head nice guy pay for dinner.

Everytime we go out for dinner with my mom, she dont pay, I pay. So really one way only.. So I told my wife she better be reasonable.

Every year we go on vacation, I pay for everything for my wife. She is working and have a decent job. I pay for airfare, i pay for food, I even pay for shopping...

Then the last time, my mother in law try to cho-cho again and insisted that we have kids soon. I again told her to FUCK OFF. She made my wife and me miserable. I had told my wife we will plan for kids but not so soon. But as you know, all wives listen to their mothers only... So I lan lan and popped out some kids with my wife a year later.

But I take my revenge on my Mother In Law. I dont let my kids stay overnigh or spend the entire day with my mother in law. Too bad lor. Its my kids and I have 100% right to say what I want.

One day, I told my wife she better manage her mother or my ultimatum is that I won't be stepping into her mother's house anymore. She and her mom thought I was joking... KNN, they also kena sai.

For 9 months, I really NEVER step into her mothers flat. When my wife say go back to her mother place for lunch. I said OK... I drive her there and drop her and then I go to kopi tiam and eat my Mee Pok and tell my wife to call me when she is finished eating there. Or I even more scheming. I will ask my children to choose whether to eat their Por Por place or come with me to eat at McD or KFC... I SURE WIN ma.... See, my mother in law cant get to see my kids when I can help it. She also don't see me. She asked my wife why, I tell my wife to tell her that I am pissed with her lor.

These days, my mother in law knows the boundaries, but once in a while she will try her luck. I don't give her any face and I will tell her off.

I learnt all these from my best buddies and I must say, IT WORKS. I feel good as a husband in 100% control and my wife also is brought into alignment. My wife sometimes threaten divorce. I told her : Sure, if you want divorce, go and file lor. I won't lose.

You know why? I kept a box full of receipts of my household expenses, my checkbooks date back to 10 years since we were married all showing I paid for expenses for matrimonial home, and my credit card bills I scanned and circled expenses in resturants where I paid for her parents dinners, my travel agency also sends our holidays' receipts all issued to my name.

This is in case one day I go before the Divorce Court and then my Lawyer will use these documents and tell Women Charter to FUCK OFF. Because i am the sole bearer of the matrimonial expenses and all the history behind to back this up. Should my wife divorce me, she wont get 50% split. She will likely get less than 40% . I am prepared all the way for battle anytime.

So brother, I know it is irrelevant. But the keypoint is, you have to be a BASTARD and learn to be a FUCKER when you deal with your situation as you are facing now. Be STRONG Bro.

Having said this, I am not saying all women are bad... but there are some out there who will manipulate their husbands with their mothers.

So watch out! We need to look out for each other.

[topcook1]

Too bad I had just moved out of mum in law house this morning with a heavy heart..Hugz my daughter and sob said good bye....

[S.B.Y.1]

Originally Posted by topcook1

Too bad I had just moved out of mum in law house this morning with a heavy heart..Hugz my daughter and sob said good bye....

Its definitely heartwrenching to leave your love ones but be strong as its only temporary.

Take this time to self reflect and grow both mentally and emotionally stronger to make a comeback later.

Keep constant contact with your children and let them know that you are with them no doubt not physically.

[andy32]

Originally Posted by topcook1

Saw she has a solicitor name card in her cupboard..Guess she is going to fire her first salvo soon.. Btw does divorce take three years to proceed if I dont acknowledge or agree to it?Can anyone advice?

bro that depends on how long is ur marriage..like me married for 15yrs 2kids age 14 n 8.....mine need 4yrs to proceed....anyway cheer up bro i fully understand how u feel cos i was once in the same shoe as u....take care

[maxsee]

Aiyah pity dunno how to cut n paste ppl post...but maxpee88...wah u heng ur wife dunno the law siah....according to my friends who are lawyers....if u are paying for every single thing for the household..in the event of divorce u are the joker who will be losing out....watever u are paying now...u have to maintain it for ur wife after u divorce for ur info....u super heng ur wife never consult a proper divorce lawyer...if so...u G_G....once u show receipts...her lawyer sure laugh at u all the way to the court.....u think becoz u pay all u are safe...actually u are wrong..u gotten urself in the worse scenario imaginable......if 50/50 then she hard to claim...pls la....

[maxsee]

One thing for sure...not everyone really knows how woman charter works.....

[S.B.Y.1]

Originally Posted by maxsee

One thing for sure...not everyone really knows how woman charter works.....

http://sbfsg.agency/showthread....909&highlight=

Courtesy of bRuR Big Sexy

[vscelwan]

Originally Posted by topcook1

Saw she has a solicitor name card in her cupboard..Guess she is going to fire her first salvo soon.. Btw does divorce take three years to proceed if I dont acknowledge or agree to it?Can anyone advice?

don't need to wait 3 or 4 years...mine less then one year we got it done... we told the lawyer we sleep in seperate room since started when, the date was counted from when we don't sleep together and the reason is bla bla bla bla....we engaged one lawyer....before we see the lawyer both of us have discussed and agreed on the maintaineant, custody and etc....

if both of you not settle the term and condition, be prepare for the addition lawyer fee and separation waiting time 3 to 4 years.

[Redlordjr]

Originally Posted by khoon1

Must get PI to get caught her evidence in 1st place ,Once you got all evidence you win custody chance is much easy andhigher and dont need pay in court fee oso to her any fee in future ....for affair matters ,dont need three years at all ,its immed ...and only PI can attack with the strong prove in court and court listen to PI more than you ! vailed evidence can only last not more than 2 year .
Just get the evidence 1st can pay PI company in later part .....
if you miss this is going more more fee in later part .. dont wait .....even lisbian aso can be done in court ...

Don't you ever read people's first post ? If you were a PI how cume your england is so very powerderful ? You are giving people wrong advise.

[ricrain29]

Sigh....when a woman change her heart, they will become a heartless bitch with no feelings at all. Their perspective will be so one sided (to their side) of course, and they will be all out to defend themselve and to destroy you in certain case (TS case included). Sigh..... reminds me of my ex..... when we part the last word i remember was "What have you done for me?" My heart really broke into small pieces..... what does she mean? She has no more memory is it? Or she has selective memory, erase the good times only remember the bad times? Up till now I still cant find myself a closing to what she said to me. As Bob Marley once sung "No woman no cry" Cheers!!!!