Lifestyle Tips I Adopt, You Should Too!

[shitrules]

Wow. what an amazing thread... thanks for all the tips to TS and other contributers.
I have a question: When talking to a girl, many times I am so focused on the conversation and trying to respond intellegiently, that I completely forget to notice body language and to pick up her IOIs.

In other words, how do you guys "split your brain into two"?
Being able to engage in a conversation, yet notice all those subtle body language cues, and insert all the DHVs?

[pale_dick]

Your Appearance

Look Confident
Hold your shoulders back, straighten your back up, when you're walking, standing,sitting, approaching, and laughing. Holding your shoulders back amplifies your chest and shoulders, which makes you look more confident.

Different looks for different women.
Usually, women are looking for a long term relationship from men. Your image must reflect this. Think about it like this. You are presented with two girls that are identical twins, in which the only difference is that one of them is wearing a super short skirt and a tiny top, while the other one is wearing a regular, slightly sexy dress. If you were asked which one you wanted to have sex with, you would opt for the one with her ass cheeks hanging out. However, if you were asked which one you want to start a relationship with,
you would choose the other.

Women have that state of mind ALL THE TIME. Unlike men, they are looking for a man to start a relationship with, not a man to simply have sex with. Granted, looks are important to a woman, but a woman is looking for a man with maturity and stability.

Always look your best
You should always take your time to look your best. You never know when you may have the opportunity to meet a stunning, beautiful woman. Be sure to pay attention to the whole outfit. It's worth the extra money to buy yourself some nice clothes. And don't forget about the shoes, a new belt and a nice watch. Accessories do make a huge difference. If you wear a well put-together outfit you will look sharp and portray more confidence. The way you dress actually will change how you behave. Think about it- if you wore a clown costume all day, you would feel silly and goofy. So if you want to have more sex appeal, wear something that makes you feel sexy.

Refine Your Looks.
Women notice every little thing about a man's grooming.
Every time they see a man, they go through a mental checklist.
Is his hair washed and styled?
Are his fingernails clean or manicured?
Are his shoes polished?
Clothes clean?
Is he bathed?
Does he smell good?
These little things matter to women! Clean and neat counts! Find a grooming regime that works for you and stay polished! Show women that you care about your appearance. Take pride in how you look, and you instantly improve your chances of success!

Your shoes do matter
Wearing exclusive shoes will definitely help polish a man's image. This image can make a big difference between a normal man and a man with expensive shoes in the first stages of dating. In addition, note that poor quality shoes are especially noticeable when a man is well dressed because of the contrast it creates. Women will notice small details such as cheap shoes, and it is therefore worth spending the extra dollars to buy higher quality shoes.

Let me explain. Lower-priced shoes are usually associated with cheap mannerisms and women usually don't like cheap men. So when a woman looks at a man's shoes, she will analyze them. If he is wearing cheap shoes, then she may come to the conclusion that he is a cheap person; not frugal, but cheap. This may seem pretty farfetched, but in fact, it isn't. Ask a female friend and you will be surprised about her opinion on the matter.

Simply take this advice and don't lose out on a hot member of the opposite sex because you didn't want to spend a few extra dollars on quality shoes. Although style is not a substitute for great personality, wearing stylish shoes can definitely give someone an edge when it comes to attracting women on a first date, but it is not the perfect solution.

Being comfortable.
The best way to attract women is to just be comfortable with yourself. When you are comfortable, people feel comfortable around you. Relax and chill out. Lean back and take it one step at a time. Women approach guys who are having a good time, not the ones that are out LOOKING for a woman.

Don't fidget with your tie/drink/change/pen etc.
These are obvious signs of nervousness and lack of confidence, which are very unattractive to her.

A tip about clothing:
1. Stay away from wearing very large baggy pants. Large baggy pants actually make a person appear shorter than they really are.
2. Bright shirts and white shirts accentuate a man’s muscular features. When a guy wears something bright, he appears larger than he really is. However, when a guy wears dark clothing, he appears skinnier.
3. Striped (vertical) dress shirts and skinnier pants make a man appear taller than he really is.
4. Make sure NOT to have imbalance. If you are going to wear skinny clothing, make sure it’s on the top AND bottom. If you are going to wear large clothing, make sure it’s on the top AND bottom. Don’t mix the two. Large clothing on the top and skinny on the bottom gives that odd “football player” look, whereas skinny on the top and large on the bottom give the “clown” look.
5. In a survey, EIGHT out of TEN girls said they find JEANS the sexiest thing a man can wear.

Body Language
A girl once said, “I can see if a guy is good in bed, just by the way he walks.” A woman can tell a lot about you, just by the way you look, speak and act. It comes from all those years of experience of guys hitting on them.

If you go out dressed like you do not care about your image at all, you
probably don't care, and women will notice this. On the other hand, if you go out dressed as a socially cool guy, you’ll notice different results. As for the woman, she really doesn’t want to hook up with some low self-esteem loser, or some boring guy who doesn’t know how to give her some fun in her life. So they screen you and try to find out as many things about you as possible in a very short period of time.

Now let me ask you who the really confident men in our society are, the ones with an attitude larger then life. Who are they? Rock stars, company directors, successful managers, doctors, politicians etc.

Take a look at how they walk, how they sit, how they speak, and you'll notice something really interesting. They are totally calm, like they control
TIME. They are not in a hurry. The way they move and how they speak completely radiates with confidence.

Take a look at what are the most common mistakes when approaching women
Talking too fast, indicating nervousness.
Talking too much, trying to impress her.
Not knowing what to say next.
Drinking, to become comfortable.
Asking too many questions
Buying her drinks (trying to buy her over, or even worse, trying to get her drunk)
Not being comfortable talking with strangers (social anxiety)

Does any of this radiate with any confidence? No. Take a look and see that every action here projects insecurity! Ok, let’s correct this poor body language together.

Here is list of things that you must FIX…
Keep your hands out of your pockets.
Stand with your feet wider apart.
Never look down when you walk, look above the horizon.
Stand with your chest pushed outwards
Keep your shoulders relaxed and back
Walk confidently and slowly with bigger steps
Pay attention to how you dress
Touch people when you talk with them (non-sexual), because you must create conversation on all levels, not just verbally.

[abugga]

Originally Posted by benlyk

abugga, i'd really love to be your friend you've got so much to learn.

hahaha thanks for the support yah

[abugga]

Originally Posted by shitrules

Wow. what an amazing thread... thanks for all the tips to TS and other contributers.
I have a question: When talking to a girl, many times I am so focused on the conversation and trying to respond intellegiently, that I completely forget to notice body language and to pick up her IOIs.

In other words, how do you guys "split your brain into two"?
Being able to engage in a conversation, yet notice all those subtle body language cues, and insert all the DHVs?

Active IOIs
*She reinitiates conversations when you stop talking
*She giggles
*She touches you
*She tries to get rapport and build comfort with you
*She looks back and glances at you repeatedly ever minute or so
*She tosses her hair (to see if you will look)
*If eye contact happens from a distance, she holds it for a second
*She smiles at you
*She stands nearby (proximity)
*She interrupts your conversation from nearby or laughs at something you said
*While walking by, she turns her body toward you or brushes against you
*She says something to her friend and they both giggle
*She asks you for a light or the time or in any way initiates a conversation
*While you're talking to her group, she is particularly talkative (to get your attention)
*She asks you for your name
*She asks you your age (make her guess)
*She compliments you
*She is playful and tries to challenge you
*She's disagreeing but laughing
*She's punching your arm but laughing
*She uses nicknames for you
*She plays with her hair while talking to you
*When she is sitting next to you her leg touches yours
*She repeatedly touches you in any way
*She asks if you have a girlfriend
*She mentions your girlfriend without knowing if you actually have one
*When she has to go to the bathroom, she comes back
*She holds eye contact for longer periods of time when she speaks with you
*She avoids mentioning her boyfriend
*If it comes up that you like somthing, she mentions that she likes it, too, or needs someone to show her how to do it
*When she says or does something, she looks at you to see your reaction
*She looks at you from the side, to hide the fact that she's looking
*She introduces you to friends
*She buys you a drink
*She calls you a player or a heartbreaker
*On her way out, she reapproaches you to tell you that she is leaving (Get her #)
*On your way out, she asks you where you are going (Invite her)
*She returns your calls
*She invents reasons to be near you, intereact with you, or have isolation with you

Passive IOIs
*Her friends go (to the bathroom or bar or dancing) but she stays
*She moves to see you and hangs with you for extended periods
*If you move, she follows you or waits for you
*She doesn't flinch or pull back if you happen to get too close
*She doesn't resist when you escalate physically


The most important IOIs to look for are:
*She re-initiates conversation when you stop talking
*She giggles
*She touches you
*She tries to get rapport and build comfort with you"

[Tripster]

Hallo, so many tips....how to follow? By the time I memorise and practice them, game over.

Appreciate all the advice brudder dick and bugga...can you distill the wisdom to 3 - 5 simple steps? That way it is easier to follow....kum sia...

peace

[abugga]

Originally Posted by Tripster

Hallo, so many tips....how to follow? By the time I memorise and practice them, game over.

Appreciate all the advice brudder dick and bugga...can you distill the wisdom to 3 - 5 simple steps? That way it is easier to follow....kum sia...

peace

All i can say is, there is not short cut to success bro, be it life or pussy

[DegenerationX]

Originally Posted by abugga

Build up that confidence boy
Constantly tell yourself how attractive you are... how any woman would be blown away by you if you sat down and had a chat and they got to know you. Tell yourself these types of things every day for one month, then take a good look at yourself in the mirror and you will notice that you actually DO look much better than you think. This will also boost your confidence at an amazing rate.

Value value value
If you want to be successful with gorgeous girls the number one thing you should remember is you should be the leader of the pack, the guy everyone looks up to. You've got to have value. You won't believe how many guys have a few unsuccessful closes and start to question their ability and undo all their hard work. Inner game and outer game goes hand in hand. Think highly of yourself and others will think highly of you - including gorgeous women

In my point of view, those I highlighted are actually more or less the same thing.

Just to share an incident that happend to me 2 weeks ago. Me and a group of frds (guys and ladies) were having KTV session at party world for some celebration. There was this lady A which I only met a few times before, not really on close term with her and I do not even have her contact number. My frd was chasing over this lady A and all of us knows it. My frd always try to stay close with her, sit beside her. So tat nite, i was singing a duet with her and out of nowhere, I said: "I know you have interest in me!" Everyone was shocked and she just laughed. On that nite, I bumped into her outside the washroom and she took the moment to take my contact number. After tat nite, we constantly contacted each other and I eventually bonked her.

I personally agree that self-confidence is an important factor when ladies choose guys.

[abugga]

Some suggestions for your first date!

Before you go on your first date, have something planned. You don't have to keep a full itinerary of places to visit, but you must have an idea what activities you can do on your first date to make sure she would want a second one. All your first date activities should improve your initial attraction for one another, so impersonal activities that don't encourage much conversation are out. Here are three tips for your first date; things to do to increase attraction.

1. Find a place with a Love Seat: Touching her on your first date is tricky, but you have more chances of increasing her attraction for you if you can make her feel your presence more through platonic touching. Sitting across each other in a café is too impersonal, so you have to find a better place to talk. If you cannot find a coffee shop with a love seat, you can go to the park and sit side-by-side on a park bench.

2. Sharing a food item: If you're going to the movies, buy only one big bucket of popcorn you can share with her. If you're eating dinner in a fancy restaurant, order one dessert you can eat together. Sharing things on your date will make you feel more like a couple.

3. Full Body Contact: Some nice activities to increase intimacy and sexual tension include slow dancing and cuddling under the stars (on a chilly night). Full body contact on your first date means making her feel that you're not just looking for a gal pal. Be patient on your first date and don't go for a kiss just yet (unless she's the one who asks for it). Your goal must be to improve rapport and get comfortable with each other's company. If you do it right, you will get a second date.

[abugga]

After having a good date with a girl and you are back at her place, try to leave something behind that will remind her of you. Leaving a shirt behind is what I recommend, because it will probably smell like your cologne and the smell will make her think of you. This also gives you an excuse to see her again. When she calls to tell you that you've forgotten something, act like it is no big deal and say that you'll pick it up next time you get together.
Now that's your opening for a 2nd get together

After you go on a date with a woman you are very interested in, and if you feel that everything on your date went very well, send flowers to her workplace. Women love to show off when a guy they are dating does something romantic for them, and their work is the absolute best place for them to show off. Most women are either good friends or highly competitive with their female co-workers, which is a win-win situation for them when they receive a gift while at work. Chances are she will give you a call the moment she gets the flowers, try it. To balance out the equation and make it seem like you aren't a needy guy, you can joking act like "Aww no, I meant to send those to someone else!" Say it with a smile and you are as good as gold. Also, only do this once, as making a habit out of spoiling a woman will lead to her either taking advantage of you or expecting you to continue that behavior forever.

[dennischan]

thx to all bros who contributed to this thread!!

TOTALLY recommend it to all guys who are looking to build their inner game =)

[Softcore]

Great topic!

Reading it is one thing, but putting it into action is another.

[shitrules]

Originally Posted by Softcore

Great topic!

Reading it is one thing, but putting it into action is another.

Second that totally.... Great information. But its damm difficult to put these theories in action.

[abugga]

Do agree some of the pointers are hard to be placed into good solid action but at least start off by injecting some healthy dosage of confidence into yourself and start improving on your fashion sense, look good feel good about yourself, whoever said it has to be just for the sole purpose of getting laid more often? take it as a change for a better you!

[SGDreamchaser]

damm. all the shifus all nv post alr. ok. may i post another case study?

assuming u are eating alone, and u are walking to see which foodcourt has single people eating alone. now u see this gorgeous babe sitting alone. what do u say after she says u can sit with her?

pls post soon so i can up u guys!

[abugga]

Originally Posted by SGDreamchaser

damm. all the shifus all nv post alr. ok. may i post another case study?

assuming u are eating alone, and u are walking to see which foodcourt has single people eating alone. now u see this gorgeous babe sitting alone. what do u say after she says u can sit with her?

pls post soon so i can up u guys!

Don't get caught without conversation starters on a "first date"! The guys who can wow a woman from the moment they meet her all know a secret: women love funny, relaxed, attentive guys who want to hear all about them. There is nothing that a woman finds more flattering than to be asked about her opinions, feelings, and life experiences.

So when you find yourself in a situation where the silence starts to grow, ask a question! What do you want to know about this woman? I will warn you right now: she'll notice immediately if you're not really interested in her response. If you want to get to know a woman better, you need to show how interested you are in her. Better yet, when she shares her accomplishments and hobbies, you will find yourself in a perfect situation to compliment her ... and complimenting a woman will suddenly make you much more attractive in her eyes. The least attractive guy in the world can find himself swarmed with women if he simply does two things: appreciate them and let them know it.

When you're on a first date, remember the following tips.

1. Keep all conversation positive. Never bring up negative things, like how hard your life is right now, how you've been seeking for a job for months, or how complicated things are with your parents. Avoid controversial subjects until you get to know the person better.

2. Relax! Women can sense fear and nervousness, even if you think you're hiding it well. When you are nervous, you often speak faster, and you may appear more serious or intense than you usually are. You may want to try watching a comedy, reading cartoons, or doing whatever makes you double over in uncontrollable laughter before your date. Laughing will relax all your muscles, send good feelings to your brain, and get your blood pumping. You'll meet her with a great big smile on your face--and she'll respond.

3. When she is talking, lean forward, look into her eyes (not down at her chest), and respond to what she says. If you agree, smile and nod. If she's talking about something serious, take it seriously. DO NOT lean back in your chair and look around the restaurant as she talks. DO NOT stare at her so intensely that she feels uncomfortable. Give her the space to look back at you by occupying yourself with your plate of food, or by gazing at a spot on the tablecloth while you focus on listening to her.

4. Don't ask the same old questions, as if you're going through a checklist. Everyone gets asked what they do or where they're from. Try some questions that she's never been asked before. If you can, focus the question on something that you've noticed about her specifically. For example, if she walks particularly gracefully, you might ask her if she's been a dancer. Not only will she feel flattered, but the question will give her the opportunity to talk about whether she likes dancing ... which might lead to an invitation for a second date later on in the night.

Here are some other conversation starters that you might wish to ask. If any of these questions seem to strike a nerve, quickly move on. NEVER push an issue. You might sense that there is more to a topic than she wants to tell you at this point, and that's okay. The point is to make her feel comfortable and open up to you, NOT to make her feel uncomfortable and tense.

Conversation Starter #1:
"Do you have a pet? What's your favorite kind of pet?"

This should start up a lively conversation, because people LOVE their pets and love talking about them. If she doesn't have a pet, you might wish to ask, "Really? Why not?"

Conversation Starter #2:
"That's a cool watch/necklace/pair of shoes. Where did you get it?"

The amount of time women spend preparing for dates is enormous. Most women choose everything they wear with careful deliberation. When you notice the effort they've put in and ask about something they've chosen to wear, they will feel flattered and appreciated ... as well as get to talk about their clothes and accessories, which every girl enjoys.

Conversation Starter #3:
"Have you ever done X?"

It is important to establish common ground on your first date and find some common interests. By asking her if she's ever done something that you are knowledgeable about or enjoy doing, you can find out what you have in common. Just don't use the question as a platform to go on and on about your OWN interests--no matter how interested she seems to be. Women know how to act interested, even if they're not. Mention your own hobbies, then move on to finding out more about her.

Conversation Starter #4:
"Do you follow any sports teams?"

This can be a tricky question, because men are notorious for being sports buffs. Many women don't want to be with a guy who will blow them off when their favorite team is playing on a Saturday afternoon. However, if she does follow a sports team, you may find that you'll have an instant connection.

Conversation Starter #5:
"Have you ever been to Y?"

Everyone likes talking about places they've been. Ask her if she has ever been to a local hotspot that you enjoy. Maybe it's a club, a coffee shop, a museum, or even a park or hiking trail. If she hasn't been there, and you are hitting it off by that point, you can use the question as a springboard for asking her out on a second date!

Good luck! I hope that these conversation starters give you an edge to sweep the next woman you meet off her feet.