The one you marry, is not the one you loved most?

[Know_yr_role]

Originally Posted by Deztruct

we all juz hv to learn to love an imperfect person perfectly

thanks rite bro, i think most of the time we are doing tat...

but im consider lucky then, i found someone whos super close to my "dream gal" hur hur....so i guess there might be "true love" "Mr/Ms Right" out there for everyone...jus have to search hard enuff..

fate can only bring 2 person together...the rest is up to them........

[surfer888]

Originally Posted by tissue

But, I give him back rubs every morning when I wake him up from work, sometimes I give him a good BJ early in the morning, I buy surprise gifts for him even though I always say I did not buy him any presents and I always take note of his likes and dislikes and try not to do it..

He must be one lucky man.

I used to tell my gf (wife now) that I would love to be woken in the mornings with a surprise BJ. More than 10 years later... I have given up on that fantasy.

[asdfghjkl]

Originally Posted by surfer888

I have given up on that fantasy.

hehe.. funny ler.. oh, nice signature by the way.. kekeke

[giggz83]

Originally Posted by surfer888

He must be one lucky man.

I used to tell my gf (wife now) that I would love to be woken in the mornings with a surprise BJ. More than 10 years later... I have given up on that fantasy.

haha.. i used to tell that to my ex-gf too!! but .. same, never .. now she left me ..

[giggz83]

Originally Posted by surfer888

He must be one lucky man.

I used to tell my gf (wife now) that I would love to be woken in the mornings with a surprise BJ. More than 10 years later... I have given up on that fantasy.

haha.. i used to tell that to my ex-gf too!! but .. same, never .. now she left me ..

[Deztruct]

Originally Posted by tissue

Are you sure that you love her then? When you love somebody, you will not hesitate..Even though we are all adults, there are also times when we will do things for a person that we love..

Maybe you are too confused..May I suggest some time off from each other ( maybe 1 month) then you can start contacting her to see if you still have strong feelings for her?

Cheers / Tissue

Mayb i juz dun wan to b the 3rd party and be the cause of her breakup with her bf (not sure if i mentioned she is attached)..i been a victim of 3rd party before so i noe how it feel

Our common frd told me tat she doesnt seem to be happy in her present relationship and she is stayin on becoz she has been with her bf for 5 yrs..i dunno how true is it also? Sometimes woman can be so hard to understand at times...

i guess i really confused now..some time off will be a gd one but not 1 mth..it will be abt 20 days..in 20 days later..it will b her bdae..i hv already decided to send her flowers and the prezzie which i already got for her (tat prezzie has alot of significance to us)..it might be the last thing i ever gave her also..and i dun think i wld wan to reveal my feelings for her...meanwhile for these 20 days..i wld try not to contact her also..at least we can hv some time to ourselves and think abt wat we wan and also in case if i contact during these 20 days..i might change my mind and end up not givin her the bdae prezzie..i really wanted to give it to her and i dun wan to regret in future not giving it to her (bcoz of the really special significance attached to it)

[asdfghjkl]

can say what is it bo?

[Know_yr_role]

Originally Posted by Deztruct

Mayb i juz dun wan to b the 3rd party and be the cause of her breakup with her bf (not sure if i mentioned she is attached)..i been a victim of 3rd party before so i noe how it feel

Our common frd told me tat she doesnt seem to be happy in her present relationship and she is stayin on becoz she has been with her bf for 5 yrs..i dunno how true is it also? Sometimes woman can be so hard to understand at times...

i guess i really confused now..some time off will be a gd one but not 1 mth..it will be abt 20 days..in 20 days later..it will b her bdae..i hv already decided to send her flowers and the prezzie which i already got for her (tat prezzie has alot of significance to us)..it might be the last thing i ever gave her also..and i dun think i wld wan to reveal my feelings for her...meanwhile for these 20 days..i wld try not to contact her also..at least we can hv some time to ourselves and think abt wat we wan and also in case if i contact during these 20 days..i might change my mind and end up not givin her the bdae prezzie..i really wanted to give it to her and i dun wan to regret in future not giving it to her (bcoz of the really special significance attached to it)

Bro, I just wan to give my view on yr issue, i know every r/s is different and everyone has their own way of handling them.

I know you dun wan to be a 3rd party and its not nice to separate couples. but look at it this way, at the least u can do is to tell her wat are your feelings towards her, and there will be several reactions from her;

1.If her r/s is ROCK STEADY with her present bf, she would do anything at all, at most tell u sorry tat u are late in winning her heart over.

2. IF her r/s isnt so steady and she has 2nd thoughts abt her present bf and IF she feels the same way towards you, then SHE will then have to decide herself who is the better man for her....let her decide without giving her any pressure at all...IF she chooses you over her bf, that says alot abt her present r/s rite??

bottom line is no matter wat, i feel tat you should tell her yr feelings and NOT have to regret it later in life, thinking wat IF you had told her abit it, maybe life would be different for you.. do u understand wat i am trying to say bro??

tell u an incident with my cousin, he have feelings for his poly classmate, for 2 yrs, they hang out being very very close frz and talks abt anything...except tat my cousin has feelings for this gal yet he never told her abt. after poly grad, my cousin went Aust to take his degree for 2 yrs, so they separated..somewhere down the line, they lost contact, but my cousin still have feelings for her all this while...while during his last yr of studies over there, thru their mutual fr, he got to know tat SHE got married. my cousin was heartbroken cos he didnt even got a chance to tell her his feelings at all...few months pass...... he came back to sg after finishing his deg, after hes back, he manage to contact her and went out for some coffee. they chatted like old frz and talk abt the past and present...finally my cousin casually told her abt the feelings for her. having the thoughts tat since she is married already...might as well tell her also... a moment of silence once he spoke of it....she looked at him and said with teary eyes "why all this while you never said anything to me" " actually i have feelings for you too, but u never said anything to me all this while, and so i kept quiet too"....."but sorry now im married le......."

my cousin was really depressed for quite sometime but eventually got over it, thinking that as long as she was happy with her life and husband now, tats all it matter......

hope u will think abt yr issue bro.....cheers

[JWNY]

Originally Posted by john99

perhaps both husband and wife have not gone round the block to appreciate the effort required to keep a marriage alive.

I think this is essential...not too short a time and neither too long to let someone wait...true love can be cultivated

Thanks all who have contributed to my thread so far.......

JWNY

[bunnyrabbit]

Originally Posted by Deztruct

Our common frd told me tat she doesnt seem to be happy in her present relationship and she is stayin on becoz she has been with her bf for 5 yrs..i dunno how true is it also? Sometimes woman can be so hard to understand at times...

i guess i really confused now..some time off will be a gd one but not 1 mth..it will be abt 20 days..in 20 days later..it will b her bdae..i hv already decided to send her flowers and the prezzie which i already got for her (tat prezzie has alot of significance to us)..it might be the last thing i ever gave her also..and i dun think i wld wan to reveal my feelings for her...meanwhile for these 20 days..i wld try not to contact her also..at least we can hv some time to ourselves and think abt wat we wan and also in case if i contact during these 20 days..i might change my mind and end up not givin her the bdae prezzie..i really wanted to give it to her and i dun wan to regret in future not giving it to her (bcoz of the really special significance attached to it)

IMHO, woman likes to have a reserve jux in case..just like us guys like to have a spare tyre in car for emergencies..pls do make sure that you are not her reserve before you do anything lor..just my experience teels me that only..

take care bro...and dun give up 1 tree for a forest

[Deztruct]

Originally Posted by asdfghjkl

can say what is it bo?

its a watch with the words 'tian chang di jiu' engraved behind..the time is paused at our happiest moment

[Deztruct]

Originally Posted by bunnyrabbit

IMHO, woman likes to have a reserve jux in case..just like us guys like to have a spare tyre in car for emergencies..pls do make sure that you are not her reserve before you do anything lor..just my experience teels me that only..

take care bro...and dun give up 1 tree for a forest

Seriously, even if i really been treated as a spare tyre..i did it all willingly for the past year or so..mayb it is love or juz plain stubornness on my part

imagine a traveller..he had hiked through the forest, wearily, he came to a tree..he sat down under the shade..enjoyin his water while listening to the sounds of the wind blowing through the leaves..somehow he juz wan to remain at tat tree for the rest of his life and not plough thru the jungle lookin for other trees

thanks for the concern tho

[jinrenhe]

Originally Posted by Deztruct

imagine a traveller..he had hiked through the forest, wearily, he came to a tree..he sat down under the shade..enjoyin his water while listening to the sounds of the wind blowing through the leaves..somehow he juz wan to remain at tat tree for the rest of his life and not plough thru the jungle lookin for other trees

i understand that feelin.

Her coming birthday wld actually be an appropriate occasion for clearing up what's ambigious between the two of u.

I'm not qualified to give u advice, cos i'm but a pathetic loser in relationship. But i'm moved by ur feelings for her... wish u all the best in whatever decisions u'll be taking

[Deztruct]

Originally Posted by jinrenhe

i understand that feelin.

Her coming birthday wld actually be an appropriate occasion for clearing up what's ambigious between the two of u.

I'm not qualified to give u advice, cos i'm but a pathetic loser in relationship. But i'm moved by ur feelings for her... wish u all the best in whatever decisions u'll be taking

mayb i am more of a loser than u..there are always a 101 reasons not to do something on her bdae..its her bdae..the least i can do is to let her spend tat day happily and not try to trouble her

bro..u not a loser.u hv not met the rite ger..i hv but yet i dun dare to do anything.tats more a loser rite?

[Deztruct]

Originally Posted by jinrenhe

i understand that feelin.

Her coming birthday wld actually be an appropriate occasion for clearing up what's ambigious between the two of u.

I'm not qualified to give u advice, cos i'm but a pathetic loser in relationship. But i'm moved by ur feelings for her... wish u all the best in whatever decisions u'll be taking

mayb i am more of a loser than u..there are always a 101 reasons not to do something on her bdae..its her bdae..the least i can do is to let her spend tat day happily and not try to trouble her

bro..u not a loser.u hv not met the rite ger..i hv but yet i dun dare to do anything.tats more a loser rite?