lost interest in having sex with gf

[tokkon1]

Originally Posted by cgfreak

fellow samster,

I'm in a dillema here, I've been with my gf for nearly 2 years now. but recently, I seemed to have lost interest in having sex with her. desperately need advice here.

Read this article, may prove helpful to you (No credit to me, I just cut and paste):

Sexual Desire Disorder

Provided by Psychology Today
Definition

Lack of sexual interest.

Symptoms

Communication problems
lack of affection not associated with continuing into sexual intercourse
power struggles
lack of time alone together
A very restrictive upbringing concerning sex, or negative or traumatic sexual experiences
Physical illnesses and some medications
Psychological conditions such as depression and excessive stress may inhibit sexual interest
Fatigue
Individuals who were victims of childhood sexual abuse or rape, and persons whose marriages are lacking in emotional intimacy are particularly at risk

Causes
Factors, possibly stresses at home, work, or school, are involved in its onset.

Treatment
The majority of the time, medical evaluation and lab tests will not reveal a physical cause. However, testosterone is the hormone responsible for creating sexual desire in both men and women. It may be useful to check testosterone levels, particularly in men who have ISD. Blood for such lab tests in men should be drawn before 10:00 a.m., when male hormone levels are at their highest. Interviews with a specialist in sex therapy are more likely to reveal possible causes.

Treatment must be individualized to the factors that may be inhibiting sexual interest. Some couples will need relationship enhancement work or marital therapy prior to focusing directly on enhancing sexual activity.

Some couples will need to be taught skills in conflict resolution and be helped to work through differences in nonsexual areas.

Many couples will also need direct focus on the sexual relationship wherein through education and couple assignments they expand the variety and time devoted to sexual activity.

When problems with sexual arousal or performance are factors, these sexual dysfunctions will need to be addressed.

Prevention

One major way of preventing ISD is to reserve time for nonsexual intimacy with one's partner. Couples who reserve weekly talk time and time for a weekly date alone without the kids, will maintain a closer relationship and are more likely to feel sexual interest. Couples should also detach sex and affection, so that neither one is afraid to be affectionate on a daily basis, fearing that it will be interpreted as an invitation to proceed to intercourse.

Reading books or taking courses in couple communication, or reading books about massage may also encourage feelings of closeness. For some individuals, reading novels or viewing movies with romantic or sexual content may also serve to encourage sexual desire.

For too many couples, sex gets what is left over late at night. Regularly reserving "prime time," before exhaustion sets in, for both talking and sexual intimacy will encourage closeness and sexual desire.

When both partners have low sexual desire, the issue of sexual interest level will not be problematic in the relationship. Low sexual desire, however, may be a barometer of the emotional health of the relationship. In other cases where there is an excellent and loving relationship, low sexual desire may cause a partner to repeatedly feel hurt and rejected, leading to eventual feelings of resentment and promoting eventual emotional distance.

Sex is something that, for most couples, either bonds their relationship closer together, or something that becomes a wedge that gradually drives them apart. When one partner is significantly less interested in sex than their companion, and this has become a source of conflict and friction, it is recommended that professional help is needed before the relationship becomes further strained.

Hi,

Me thinks u should stop for a while and romance her.
Yes. U read.
Stop for a while. Things are too routine already.

Like in sports, we have a cooling down period and a high period. We shift to hi gear when Events in a few months time. This is important as the body cannot sustain at hi level ALL year round. It will be broken.

Hope this helps u brother.
And get married lah. Maybe she is trying to tell u to commit yourself to her.

Hmmm... interesting thot actually.
I amaze myself soemtimes .. hmmm

[jrbecker99]

[QUOTE=cgfreak]sigh, maybe, coz she always insist on being on top. she's always dry, say I'm rough on her. so ended up always one style only. then after I come and she can't come, then complain I am not good.
really fed up QUOTE]

sounds like u are not spending enough time on foreplay. she is dry etc. hi go down on her and eat her. dont stop keep eating. u know where her clit is. use your wet soft tongue. she will love u for it. u can tell when she cums but dont stop.

take vitamin zinc supplements at least 25mg daily. if this doesnt get you horny nothing will.

if u are using your fingers to stimulate the clit make sure your nails are cut. shrap nails give her pain. no wonder hse is dry and in pain.

if this doesnt work go to geylang get a wl to show u how to turn on your gf. not joking. get her to show u how to use your fingers and mouth.

good luck

jebecker99