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agree. the sad thing is, even before marriage, some dont even have sexual life already. sigh.
Then it is a very obvious sign that it is not going to work out well in such cases. Please do not ever harbor such illusion that things are going to get better after marriage. On the contrary, it's going to be the opposite.
@TrappedIn, I guess this is quite common among married adults now a day. Love, Feeling, Sex and Family seems to change when we age and especially when kids come along. With the current social attraction more changes to come.
It's a matter of how we handle it. I guess man and woman make some difference. Maybe keeping love as love and no doubt love without certain element in it is not the same as what we all have tasted during courtship. And what you define as "functional" and "loving".
TBH, I don't expect it to be the same pre marriage and post marriage. But certainly I feel that mostly I have put in effort to adding some spark but my better half seems to reject all forms of intimacy, even connecting at a deeper level outside of the bedroom. Our conversations revolve family and kids, little else. So I guess I'm at a stage where I m very disappointed. Of course the constant rejection from a person so dear has taken a toll on me, wondering whether there's something that makes me less appealing. However when we talk about it, it has been maintained that nothing is "wrong"
Let me share my thoughts on sexless life. Some may or may not agree to it.
We all know that sex is addictive. If we are too focusing ourselves to cum but don't care whether he/she cum or not, you might enjoy doing it again but not the other half. If the other does not enjoy the session with you, there probably won't be next time for you. If the third party can make it enjoyable, affair becomes inevitable.
No body wants an affair if possible, it costs money and may lead to ugly divorce which costs us more. If you eat the same dish everyday, it is boring and somehow we wants an alternative.
For ladies (& gents as well),
Think about it, if your are too full, no matter how delicious the food is, you may not able to eat any more (if you reach your limit). If you feed your men well enough, they have no more energy to eat outside. So, feed your men till they have no more sperm to produce with another women. We all have limited energy.
For gents,
1) In my honest opinion and experience, size does matter. Those who said, size doesn't matter, it is bullshit. Either they have never tried with a bigger tool or too shy to admit. If your size is small, she will not enjoy it and as we age, the size tends to shrink. Trust me. There are a couple of ways to make it bigger (it takes years, yes, many years). (PS: Don't ask me how to do it. I won't share. They are already available all over the internet.)
2) If you have no time/patience nor want a fast solution, take some tongat akli, viagra, cialis or something even though u don't have ED issue. It will definitely help.
3) Or you go down on her. Let her cum until she is satisfied. Give as much as you want in return.
The gist is to make sure she cum every time you have a session with her and she is sure bound to return this favor. May not come back immediately. Make her addicted. Don't force her. We all hate pressure. So, don't do that here as well.
This old man must be on pill and desperate for free fuck.
Quote:
Originally Posted by I Love Boobs
Wife gave all sorts of excuses - taking care of kids, tired.
Sex was bad - her thighs were 3 times my size, and tummy flabby with stretch marks.
Then she had an affair with a 70 year old man - some men will fuck anything.
And she chased me out, hoping he would marry her.
She got dumped later, and tried to crawl back.
.....
TBH, I don't expect it to be the same pre marriage and post marriage. But certainly I feel that mostly I have put in effort to adding some spark but my better half seems to reject all forms of intimacy, even connecting at a deeper level outside of the bedroom. Our conversations revolve family and kids, little else. So I guess I'm at a stage where I m very disappointed. Of course the constant rejection from a person so dear has taken a toll on me, wondering whether there's something that makes me less appealing. However when we talk about it, it has been maintained that nothing is "wrong"
I have heard many similar experiences but mostly from men instead of women. So you are a rare case I guess. It's rather unusual for a guy not showing interest in sex unless for the several possible reasons: 1. He has other women outside, hence little energy for you, 2. He's stressed out by other matters such as job, money, etc. I've been through that and it can affect a man's sexual drive significantly. 3. Health reasons, for which only you know or can find out.
It is indeed very hard, and very frustrating, to convince a person that the relationship needs work. I made that mistake myself by ignoring it. I can only say that it takes great amount of patience and time to eventually show your partner something is not well in your relationship. I hope you can get the point across to him eventually.
I have heard many similar experiences but mostly from men instead of women. So you are a rare case I guess. It's rather unusual for a guy not showing interest in sex unless for the several possible reasons: 1. He has other women outside, hence little energy for you, 2. He's stressed out by other matters such as job, money, etc. I've been through that and it can affect a man's sexual drive significantly. 3. Health reasons, for which only you know or can find out.
It is indeed very hard, and very frustrating, to convince a person that the relationship needs work. I made that mistake myself by ignoring it. I can only say that it takes great amount of patience and time to eventually show your partner something is not well in your relationship. I hope you can get the point across to him eventually.
I think it would be difficult to get the point across, mostly now we avoid the topic and for me I continue on in the cycle. Of wondering if things will ever improve and feeling lousy as each day passes the same way it did. I've tried to be involved in other hobbies but all these were only helping mask the issue, doesn't get to the root cause of it all..
I think it would be difficult to get the point across, mostly now we avoid the topic and for me I continue on in the cycle. Of wondering if things will ever improve and feeling lousy as each day passes the same way it did. I've tried to be involved in other hobbies but all these were only helping mask the issue, doesn't get to the root cause of it all..
So the question is do you know the root cause of it? It could be multiple causes too so may take a while for you to figure out all of it. The challenge is most men find it hard to communicate and reveal their deep, inner feelings so you should try to do so tenderly. Find the appropriate time and situation where he is most relax and at ease to talk about how he truly feels. It's like trying to open a durian, you have open it the right way or you will be pricked, hope you understand what I mean :-)
So the question is do you know the root cause of it? It could be multiple causes too so may take a while for you to figure out all of it. The challenge is most men find it hard to communicate and reveal their deep, inner feelings so you should try to do so tenderly. Find the appropriate time and situation where he is most relax and at ease to talk about how he truly feels. It's like trying to open a durian, you have open it the right way or you will be pricked, hope you understand what I mean :-)
I understand what you mean but unfortunately I'm not exactly facing a durian. At least durian once we're past the shell, there's a reward of tasting the flesh. I face a porcupine probably..
I understand what you mean but unfortunately I'm not exactly facing a durian. At least durian once we're past the shell, there's a reward of tasting the flesh. I face a porcupine probably..
Well, look at it this way. At least a porcupine has a soft side to it. All of us do too. So perhaps you can try to locate your hub's soft spot, tickle it enough and he may just open up to you :-D
TBH, I don't expect it to be the same pre marriage and post marriage.
my personal baseless opinion, possible reason for his change in attitude:
1) your physical appearance before and after marriage changed drastically
2) the way you talk to him changed after marriage
for 1 i dont think is possible, cause love is blind. for 2, did you get so comfortable after marriage that you nag on him everyday, put him down(even as a joke), say your friend husband do this do that, or forget to ask him how his day was?
either way, try help him wash his back and go shower with him. dont force things, just casually say you help him and wash him without forcing things, the most you masturbate yourself while washing him. do this for a few days if he still no feel then means he settle outside already(another baseless opinion)
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30-03-2018, 01:56 PM
Re: Group for divorced/sexless marriage/singles
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