The Guys Who Had Me

[fwchong]

I wish I can bash that guy who have sex with you when you were drunk but good to let it out and write your stories...some day when you reflect back on your digital diary

[moonlightzz]

Well, I might have agreed to his indecent proposal but forgot about it... Anyway it's in the past liaozzz.

Originally Posted by fwchong

I wish I can bash that guy who have sex with you when you were drunk but good to let it out and write your stories...some day when you reflect back on your digital diary

[saipot]

Nice share TS, thanks!

[fwchong]

sis, would love to see how your story develops with the guy in his 40s as you wrote that you are in your late 20s ?

wonder how it feel like to have a man more mature thinking by 10 years older.

My friend is the opposite. He married a teacher who is 10 years older than him ( maybe he was her student before ). Now, at present time, she is in her 70s and he is his 60s. They have a daughter in her mid to late 20s now.

A few years ago, the mum got cancer and survived. The daughter has been taking care of the mother and she neglected her friends and love life.

So I can understand how that 40 years old guy in your story feel about having a child that late not just because he has to work till 40s but also the burden on the child to take care of them when the child is just starting off his or her career or family

[moonlightzz]

Originally Posted by fwchong

sis, would love to see how your story develops with the guy in his 40s as you wrote that you are in your late 20s ?

Honestly? That relationship didn't end well. It just became a point where I got annoyed by all the hints that Justin was giving that it almost felt like I was pressured to marry him.

I wanted to make something of myself as far as my career was concerned, therefore during one of our trips overseas, I broke the news that this was our final trip together. I was a bitch because unknown to him, I had booked a last minute flight back scheduled the day after I broke up with him, it really felt awkward to be continuing on a trip with a guy that I just ended the relationship with. I did pay him back about 70% of whatever we spent on that trip alone when he came to collect his things from my place.

So ya, there you have it...

[fwchong]

Bravo on your move sis, we are not our parent time that kids is a must unless you really want children.

I hope he is also a gentlemen to let you go even though it must be hard for him. He feel pressure to have a kid maybe because his parents expectation.

After reading your story, it shows that your parent strict discipline does not equal to good upbringing as it make a relationship worst. I am not judging you sis but we also thought our parents who are so educated would know how to talk to us to build a relationship rather than control us.

In the end, if you marry this guy when you are not prepared, you may end up just like your parent restricting your own child because that same bad repetitive pattern of control is pass down to the next generation like a generation curse.

I rather be a carefree person and enjoy the moment of my life. Looking back, it is better at times to be single than to be a relationship suffering in silent with a wrong partner.

Originally Posted by moonlightzz

Honestly? That relationship didn't end well. It just became a point where I got annoyed by all the hints that Justin was giving that it almost felt like I was pressured to marry him.

ISo ya, there you have it...

[TuttiFruitti]

Originally Posted by moonlightzz

I got annoyed by all the hints that Justin was giving that it almost felt like I was pressured to marry him.

He didn't understand you well enough about your career mindedness. My ex-colleague of 3 years also like you, now 35 years old and living together with his bf... not intending to get married and don't like kids. She is petite and pretty but likes to party. Resigned June this year after working in the company for 9 years to pursue better opportunities.

[moonlightzz]

Excuse me, I think I turned out fine... So what do you mean that I don't have a good upbringing? Please watch your words. I choose my own path in life. Nothing to do with how my parents raised me. Have some respect.

Originally Posted by fwchong

Bravo on your move sis, we are not our parent time that kids is a must unless you really want children.

I hope he is also a gentlemen to let you go even though it must be hard for him. He feel pressure to have a kid maybe because his parents expectation.

After reading your story, it shows that your parent strict discipline does not equal to good upbringing as it make a relationship worst. I am not judging you sis but we also thought our parents who are so educated would know how to talk to us to build a relationship rather than control us.

In the end, if you marry this guy when you are not prepared, you may end up just like your parent restricting your own child because that same bad repetitive pattern of control is pass down to the next generation like a generation curse.

I rather be a carefree person and enjoy the moment of my life. Looking back, it is better at times to be single than to be a relationship suffering in silent with a wrong partner.

[fwchong]

sorry sis, i think it is a misunderstanding.

What I mean was to target at strict parenting and control. My auntie did that same control as what your parent did to their daughter. Every time I see her during our family gathering, I would see that she become disinterested in a lot of activities. She lost connections with her friends when her pager was also taken away. I dont know too much details but her family dont share much with us about her. I just know that when we ask her do you want to play games like monopoly, she would join us but she lose interest after a while. maybe we didnt know her situation better to connect with her. It may our fault too.

As the years goes past, she also went to UK to study because her result was not good to get into a local uni. However, she didnt come back to Singapore after that.

Too much to bear ? i dont know ?

She married a UK chef over there and right now they have their own family. Your story strike a chord in my heart when I remember about her.

Once again, sorry that I created this misunderstanding...

Originally Posted by moonlightzz

Excuse me, I think I turned out fine... So what do you mean that I don't have a good upbringing? Please watch your words. I choose my own path in life. Nothing to do with how my parents raised me. Have some respect.

[moonlightzz]

No worries. Thank you for clearing it up.

Regarding your cousin. Why can't it be that her interests are just glaringly different from the rest of you?

You mean to say just because she's a family member means must have same interest?

If it bores her, it bores her. And you can't fault someone if you fail to engage that person.

Should she have at least shown good courteousy and played along a little more? Maybe, but who are we to judge her personality and character?

Originally Posted by fwchong

sorry sis, i think it is a misunderstanding.

What I mean was to target at strict parenting and control. My auntie did that same control as what your parent did to their daughter. Every time I see her during our family gathering, I would see that she become disinterested in a lot of activities. She lost connections with her friends when her pager was also taken away. I dont know too much details but her family dont share much with us about her. I just know that when we ask her do you want to play games like monopoly, she would join us but she lose interest after a while. maybe we didnt know her situation better to connect with her. It may our fault too.

As the years goes past, she also went to UK to study because her result was not good to get into a local uni. However, she didnt come back to Singapore after that.

Too much to bear ? i dont know ?

She married a UK chef over there and right now they have their own family. Your story strike a chord in my heart when I remember about her.

Once again, sorry that I created this misunderstanding...

[fwchong]

During our time, we have very few electronic gadgets but we have board games and carrom. So, we try to ask her to join us but every time she play, she look away like very sian face and keep losing. We would tease her or make fun of her or bullied her.

In modern time right now, these are some of symptom of low self esteem and my cousin was slowly suffering from withdrawal symptom and not interests in any thing. We of course did not know how her parent treated her or "lock her up" as every time we see her, she would be sulking or looking away or just watch TV or look at a blank wall or just play with herself. My relative would say that she is naughty and need to be dsicpline.

When my parent try to test water and call her, she wont response and look away and then parents would agree with her parents that she is not obedient or dont want to engage in a chat. Some people says, it is very rude not to reply a question from your elders.

Right now with more mental health exposure, like " ARE U OK ?" day, we now know that some of these early stages of depression can be seen from such actions as it is some form of depression because one of the most common form of depression is withdrawal and loss of interests.

She went to Poly and went to work in Singapore for a short while to save some money before packing her bags to further study over in UK.

Many many years later, we saw her at our grandmother funeral.

wow..she is a totally different person, full of confidence and grace. No longer the shy and timid girl but can carry herself so well. It look like she has been through a lot and dont talk like the typical singlish talk .hahahahaha...

Our ugly ducking has now became a beautiful swan, compose and strong.

She has moved on with her new life with her chef husband and their 3 children with a couple of properties in UK. She says cars and house are cheaper than COE and HDB.

Your story kind of mimick my cousin story in some stages of your life...

Originally Posted by moonlightzz

No worries. Thank you for clearing it up.

Regarding your cousin. Why can't it be that her interests are just glaringly different from the rest of you?

You mean to say just because she's a family member means must have same interest?

If it bores her, it bores her. And you can't fault someone if you fail to engage that person.

Should she have at least shown good courteousy and played along a little more? Maybe, but who are we to judge her personality and character?

[SammyLee88]

i do also have a guy in sugarbook, still in the uncertain relationship, do not know whether can proceed

[SammyLee88]

Originally Posted by moonlightzz

Excuse me, I think I turned out fine... So what do you mean that I don't have a good upbringing? Please watch your words. I choose my own path in life. Nothing to do with how my parents raised me. Have some respect.

everyone has their own experience, need to respect all people

[SammyLee88]

Originally Posted by moonlightzz

Well, I might have agreed to his indecent proposal but forgot about it... Anyway it's in the past liaozzz.

the past just keep it as a memory

[SammyLee88]

Originally Posted by Rickey

Written in v. good English...TS sis must hv aced her English language papers in her "O" n "A" level exams

haha then can write in novel style