Do you regret marrying? - Page 14

Captainoceania77 · #**196** 06-01-2015, 03:02 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Nehtlord

Regret = a little. But there's more things that cover the regret part.
If you really do regret, then divorce. It is still your own life even you are married. Nobody gonna die with you and go to heaven or hell together. When it's time, everyone will have to go alone. It's your own life. Your choice, whatever makes you happy, go for it.

True..everyone will go alone in the end. If not happy there is no point to drag on . Very torturing .

Captainoceania77 · #**197** 06-01-2015, 03:06 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by topcook1

Penalty are high rewards are low for married man....Thats very true indeed.

36SCE · #**198** 08-01-2015, 09:37 PM

Marriage is similar to a lucky draw. You may win a prize that you like but not quite the one you wanted.

In my case, I'm 80% happily married for almost 20 years now. Wife has been very supportive in terms of my career choice, takes excellent care of kids and home and "tolerates"

my Mum living in same house so all in all, I can't complain.

Only part totally lacking is the sex part. She has totally gone off it and on the very rare occasions she does it, can tell its mechanical and just to fulfill her wifely duties till I sianz and seldom request anymore and sometimes only for HJ.

Given that we have been together such a long time and raised a happy family, I would say its been a success for me personally having a stable and comfortable home to come home everyday.

As for the missing bit, I'm starting to explore options

21MARTELL · #**199** 09-01-2015, 01:15 AM

I agree with bros here, but from a woman point of view, what woman want are actually very simple 2 things one is ur faithfulness another is your attention.

Guys may think oh the more money I earn means the more she would love me I mean who dose not need money, but to a woman a simple life is all she need unless of cause you are talking about materialistic woman, so if u know this woman only love you for how much u can earn then why marry her in the 1st place? Hmmm...

zan888 · #**200** 09-01-2015, 10:02 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by 21MARTELL

I agree with bros here, but from a woman point of view, what woman want are actually very simple 2 things one is ur faithfulness another is your attention.

Guys may think oh the more money I earn means the more she would love me I mean who dose not need money, but to a woman a simple life is all she need unless of cause you are talking about materialistic woman, so if u know this woman only love you for how much u can earn then why marry her in the 1st place? Hmmm...

Maybe it is over simplifying things cos different woman needs or looks for different things, just like some man prefer intelligent woman, some want sex kitten, some want someone who earns as much as them, some want child bearing, some want bbbj everyday haha.

Some woman will trade faithfulness for monetary gains, which is often seen in taitai's . They close eyes to infidelity as long as the line of credit is sufficient for Hermes bag.

As to the topic, marriage is about losing something and sacrifice. What you gain will entail much sacrifice monetarily, emotionally & physically. It makes sense for woman to marry, more so than man. Why? As a man gets older, he gets wealthier and higher in demand,but woman get saggy and worst, their level of service invariably drops. Sex which used to be good, gets lazy.

Marriage is seen as a way to legitimize children as in the past few people have wills and since only legitimate children can inherit father's wealth, it is important that a woman is married so that her offspring can be taken care off. But now in the modern age, this is no longer a factor and even CPF can be willed away to a SYT who uses her mouth. Marriage doesn't mean as much cos people get divorced all the time and there is not guarantee card of faithfulness attached to marriage certificate.

Man marry because we get nagged to no end by woman and we "love" them enough to embark on this foolishness and for many its prerequisite for HDB flat. Eastern culture dictates that you need to be married to have children? Otherwise your partner will always be asked, why you not married huh at every CNY and relatives will gossip that your children are not legitimate. Yeah those are the dumb reasons we men get married. If we didnt like the sex, we wont even consider this an option.

momogaga · #**201** 09-01-2015, 01:04 PM

Thinking of separation and divorce now and having read up, the emotional and financial stress could be overwhelming. Plus we have a HDB which we are going to commit to so what happens with that and the financials behind it will be a real impact to the man. And during this time you are alone... family members and friends stop talking to you after they know they have failed to convince you to save your marriage. Pretty sad and depressing times for me. Any bros care to listen and advise?

21MARTELL · #**202** 09-01-2015, 01:25 PM

Correct me if I am wrong, so most bros here are trying to say, most guys do not intentionaly wanted to get married? Most are more of the " bo bian" situation ?

topcook1 · #**203** 09-01-2015, 03:30 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by momogaga

Thinking of separation and divorce now and having read up, the emotional and financial stress could be overwhelming. Plus we have a HDB which we are going to commit to so what happens with that and the financials behind it will be a real impact to the man. And during this time you are alone... family members and friends stop talking to you after they know they have failed to convince you to save your marriage. Pretty sad and depressing times for me. Any bros care to listen and advise?

I dont think family members will stop talking to you btw they will support u emotionally. Dont be sad as everything bad things will pass.....life will still goes on. Kindly carry on and I will listen and advise u too.......

momogaga · #**204** 09-01-2015, 06:35 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by topcook1

I dont think family members will stop talking to you btw they will support u emotionally. Dont be sad as everything bad things will pass.....life will still goes on. Kindly carry on and I will listen and advise u too.......

It is very trying time for me emotionally. I want to leave and be with the love of my life but marriage vows, family and financial burden are holding me back. I used to have friends and family care and concern about me when the incident happen but now I am more or less alone in everything I do everyday.

HonkyTonkyMan · #**205** 09-01-2015, 08:19 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by momogaga

It is very trying time for me emotionally. I want to leave and be with the love of my life but marriage vows, family and financial burden are holding me back. I used to have friends and family care and concern about me when the incident happen but now I am more or less alone in everything I do everyday.

Empathize with you dude, been down that road before. One thing is, you have to be very sure what you want and not waver from your objective. If not, not only you suffer, two other parties also suffer with you.

momogaga · #**206** 09-01-2015, 08:45 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by HonkyTonkyMan

Empathize with you dude, been down that road before. One thing is, you have to be very sure what you want and not waver from your objective. If not, not only you suffer, two other parties also suffer with you.

Thanks bro. I don't know what you went through. I also deep down knows what I want. But I am even doubting myself. Is it worth destroying everything for that new person. I don't know if I am thinking right and most importantly I can't bear to face the consequence of ending it.

36SCE · #**207** 09-01-2015, 09:21 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by momogaga

It is very trying time for me emotionally. I want to leave and be with the love of my life but marriage vows, family and financial burden are holding me back. I used to have friends and family care and concern about me when the incident happen but now I am more or less alone in everything I do everyday.

Time is a healer for almost anything. Take your time to evaluate all your options carefully and when you've decided, go for it. There will never be a 100% right or wrong answer. In life, we always have to compromise somewhat.

Whatever pain you will go through after your decision is temporary. Time will heal as you start to meet new friends and gain new perspectives, experiences etc.

Johnbass · #**208** 09-01-2015, 09:33 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by 21MARTELL

Correct me if I am wrong, so most bros here are trying to say, most guys do not intentionaly wanted to get married? Most are more of the " bo bian" situation ?

Come sbf must read selectively and with many pinches of salt...
Else end up more EMO than them nia...

Yakuza · #**209** 09-01-2015, 11:24 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by 21MARTELL

Correct me if I am wrong, so most bros here are trying to say, most guys do not intentionaly wanted to get married? Most are more of the " bo bian" situation ?

If the small head rules over the big head n ended up in a bo bian situation .. than its the men himself to blame ... so why regret later when in the 1st place u wanted it and asked for it???

topcook1 · #**210** 10-01-2015, 12:16 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by momogaga

Thanks bro. I don't know what you went through. I also deep down knows what I want. But I am even doubting myself. Is it worth destroying everything for that new person. I don't know if I am thinking right and most importantly I can't bear to face the consequence of ending it.

So I see....u were seeking another greener pasture .....now i know why your relatives shy away from u.....