Long Distance Tirak Relationship - Myth or Reality

free · #1 13-03-2005, 01:29 AM

I have observed there are a reasonable number of us samsters who are involved with a woman from LOS or another foreign country, and there is no central place to share our experiences. And I agree with Samcutey that it is not appropriate to submit posts pertaining to this issue in threads focussing on other issues.

I am starting this thread again, cos there are enough bros here who like me, have fallen in love with somebody (whom we would like to call our tirak) in/from the fair Land of Smiles or are considering if they should allow themselves to fall in love, cos u have met the gal who stirred your heart. If yours is from another country, do join the club too. When this thread's predecessor appeared, perhaps it was ahead of its time, cos most of the posts in SB was about commercial sex, and some samsters felt it was out of place then. Today SB has clearly grown, with bros having more varied interests, with more ppl speaking their thoughts. And I hope this time, everybody will be more open-minded. Do offer your views and even criticisms if appropriate, but I hope we can do it with genuine concern & consideration for the pilgrims. May ALL samsters show that we can behave gentlemanly, even for sensitive topics or situations.

Some of us had it good, some of us don't. Some took systematic or logical steps to make things work, or clarify our status; others dun know what to do. In the last 2 years since I started on this journey, I have made mistakes, fallen & pick myself up a couple of times, but I have not regreted my journey one bit. And I have certainly learnt alot.

I hope this thread can help those who walk this path by serving as a place to share our experiences, joys and pains as we embark on our long journey together. When we do the right things that get results, lets share it that others bros may learn and emulate (with adaptations of course), When we made mistakes, let others learn from them too, that they may not repeat them. If we are sad, let others comfort us, and let us also give strength to those who are down.

Name your tirak or keep her name secret, it really doesn't matter. What matters is the brotherhood that we sort of share. End of it all, when one r/s works out, we will celebrate together, and if one r/s doesn't, let us be there for the afflicted.

I started the journey with one wonderful gal, and could have ended it with the same, but I recently chose not to. But my experience with her till today had spurred me on. I for one, am blessed for I had the opportunity to meet a few wonderful women, and to eventually choose one to walk the final phase of my journey. I believe have found someone who loves me with her whole heart, waited for me, almost lost me but worked hard to win me back. In other words, someone who also wanted me as much as I want her. Now and definitely working towards something permanent together. Life is steady now, after all the ups and downs. I pray that we will stand the test of time.

The first phase of meeting/dating a gal and deciding that she is worth my time and effort to get to know her better, and the 2nd phase of knowing her well enough to reach the point where I decide that this is the ONE I want to spend the rest of my life with is now completed. We are now entering the 3rd & final phase (home run phase) - towards home base where living together in a husband/wife relationship is our goal. Interestingly, this is the phase where both parties began to want to start spending less and save money for the future together.

For bros out there who have already reached your destination (happily settled down together) how about giving us (the ongoing travellers) some of your expert tips, or share your success stories? You for one will know what we are going thru, and your encouragement and pearls of wisdom will be much appreciated. For now, I would like to thank the pilgrims who walked the journey before us, and had shared your experiences and given wonderful advice. Even though I am not naming anyone here, we know who you are, and so do you. We appreciate all of you.

And if you have travelled the road but didn't make it, all the more please tell us why. It would be especially great if you can share your stories why u think the LDTR didn't make it. Then we can see the whole picture and match them to our situation if they are applicable. Help us to avoid the pitfalls. We will be eternally grateful.

Note: I hope that bros here will accept that for the intention of this thread, "Tirak" means "darling" or "loved one", not the WL/FL/ONS you visit regularly. She has to be someone you know you have feelings for and would at least like to start on the path of a serious Boy-Girl relationship. Not necessarily towards marriage (or Mia Noi, kekeke) but at least something that will involve the whole of you both - emotionally, mentall and physically. Not just bonking alone.

siamcutey · #2 13-03-2005, 01:33 AM

Now, its a myth. Whether it stays as myth or reality, I also don't know. But I don't hope for reality.

SC

free · #3 13-03-2005, 02:07 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by siamcutey

Now, its a myth. Whether it stays as myth or reality, I also don't know. But I don't hope for reality.

SC

Are you saying it is a myth from your perspective and personal experience or are you saying that it can never come true for anyone? Would really appreciate if you could elaborate.

#4 14-03-2005, 11:45 PM

[QUOTE=free]
I am starting this thread again, cos there are enough bros here who like me, have fallen in love with somebody (whom we would like to call our tirak) in/from the fair Land of Smiles or are considering if they should allow themselves to fall in love, cos u have met the gal who stirred your heart. If yours is from another country, do join the club too.

Bro Free ~ Thanks for starting this thread! I'm in the club! i would like 2 keep my tirak's name secret, and i can say i'm in ... hhhmm.. stage 2.5?? Where we're getting to noe each other beta wif a time-period and eventually n hopefully complete the home-run ~

Like bro Free said, realli realli would appriciate any form of advice or comments from the bros that have walked the path to the end ~ Thanks 4 guiding us along the way ` ~

Hakoshu · #5 14-03-2005, 11:59 PM

I feel it would be a reality if u could persist in it.. Might not have good ending though..

l3atu · #6 15-03-2005, 08:11 AM

Well, mine is in the process of becoming reality...hopefully by the end of this yr. I would share my experiences when I've resolve the problems (how to bring her in to SG etc.)

DNAT · #7 15-03-2005, 10:20 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by l3atu

Well, mine is in the process of becoming reality...hopefully by the end of this yr. I would share my experiences when I've resolve the problems (how to bring her in to SG etc.)

so must I save up for your wedding dinner starting from today onwards?

waypastprime · #8 15-03-2005, 11:16 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by DNAT

so must I save up for your wedding dinner starting from today onwards?

No need. Just go one less trip of your many silent mobs. More than enough liao.

Wannabeone · #9 15-03-2005, 11:31 AM

Personally, i dun think its a Myth. It can be a reality. A lot will be dependent on the amount of vitamin 'M' that you have. You have to see her 'physically' as in that your guys must spend time together.....and then move on from there.....eventually, one of you must make the decision of moving to the other. If not, why waste the time and effort in maintaining a long distance. It is emotionally and mentally very challenging if one do so....just my 2 cents opinion!

depp85 · #10 15-03-2005, 11:43 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Wannabeone

Personally, i dun think its a Myth. It can be a reality. A lot will be dependent on the amount of vitamin 'M' that you have. You have to see her 'physically' as in that your guys must spend time together.....and then move on from there.....eventually, one of you must make the decision of moving to the other. If not, why waste the time and effort in maintaining a long distance. It is emotionally and mentally very challenging if one do so....just my 2 cents opinion!

Well , I hope this Vitmina " M " is not a consideration factor , put the girl or us into real true love test.

whether in poor or rich , sick or healthy , happy or sad ...etc.

Just being together and live a simple life is what i want. Simple.

MachoDevilX · #11 15-03-2005, 12:15 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by depp85

Well , I hope this Vitmina " M " is not a consideration factor , put the girl or us into real true love test.

whether in poor or rich , sick or healthy , happy or sad ...etc.

Just being together and live a simple life is what i want. Simple.

It is really not that simple as what you think it will be...
I would say that Vitamin "M" is one of the most important factors. Of course with Vitamin "M" and without Love, there will be no outcome as well. But I cannot deny that without Vitamin "M", even if both of you love each other very much, there will still be no good endings. This is because of the nature of the girls upbringing. They have been brought up in an environment of being overly "fillial" to their parent and family. And that's why when the girl's family need $$, the girl will by all means, try to find $$ for them. All these will eventually relate back to the guy.

free · #12 15-03-2005, 01:43 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by waypastprime

No need. Just go one less trip of your many silent mobs. More than enough liao.

U mean save 1 bonk on of of his trips?

free · #13 15-03-2005, 01:46 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Wannabeone

Personally, i dun think its a Myth. It can be a reality. A lot will be dependent on the amount of vitamin 'M' that you have. You have to see her 'physically' as in that your guys must spend time together.....and then move on from there.....eventually, one of you must make the decision of moving to the other. If not, why waste the time and effort in maintaining a long distance. It is emotionally and mentally very challenging if one do so....just my 2 cents opinion!

Well Vitamin M is always needed in any BGR. Either we kena'ed by the local gal here when we go shopping, or we spend less on shopping there and more in Budget airfare and low-cost hotels.

Agree that after all is said and done (marriage or a similar arrangement, that is), the 2 should stay together for it to continue to work out. Who goes where is not the issue. Else, tough.