The one you marry, is not the one you loved most?

[_AXL_]

Originally Posted by dbrudder

No, nothing to do with any bad habits. I know the girl too and she is a very nice person. Quite chatty and can be witty too.

I think the things my friend had to consider was his social circle, which is very different from hers, and because she is less educated, her command of English is not strong, which sometimes is a barrier to communications.

My friend married an accountant in the end. His wife is beautiful, sexy and hardworking. But somehow I get the feeling that she is also not the one he loves the most. He loves her (he claims), but probably not the most.

All things said, I guess it is down to the individual, whether they can accept a person and marry that person based on love and overlook the other things. You could be right bro, love could be out there, but sometimes it is so damn hard a path to choose.

envy your friend then... not that i agree with his decision. but it is his choice. hope the hairdresser would find someone who will appreciate her more and not take her as just another option, but the one and only choice.

different social circles is a small problem compared to the ridicule i had to endure when i was with my ex-gf who was an ex-ktv ger. guess after what i have gone through, my present relationship allows me to concentrate on the more important stuff, like getting to know her much better and treating her well.

no offence, just my personal views. cheers.

[suteerak1099]

Originally Posted by dbrudder

....... All things said, I guess it is down to the individual, whether they can accept a person and marry that person based on love and overlook the other things. You could be right bro, love could be out there, but sometimes it is so damn hard a path to choose.

sometimes its a lil ironic so to speak. we're supposed to live our lives as who we are, be who we wanna be, do what we wanna do. but the funny thing is, we tend to complicate issues by taking into account what people around us think of us, perceive us...etc.

just a reminder, if we take too much into account what the person next to us sees us.... we'll never be good enough. much less to say, life aint worth living for already.

[_AXL_]

Originally Posted by surfer888

Glad to see this thread back again.



Maybe thats because no one has lived on love alone... they don't starve here, they leap. Love alone is not enough to keep us going. It only works that way in reel life...

what i meant was when there is love, there is a way. both can work to earn a simple but honest living and not starve to death. we r lucky to be born in sg, where opportunities are abound, no fear of starving to death... thus the pursuit of true love... yet, people still dont!!!

Unfortunately no prep work is ever enough... but the sampling was the fun part.

no foundation laid for their love shack, thus it crumbles at the first testing storm... cause and effect...

Quote of the day

so i charge it to your tab then...

[surfer888]

Originally Posted by _AXL_

what i meant was when there is love, there is a way. both can work to earn a simple but honest living and not starve to death. we r lucky to be born in sg, where opportunities are abound, no fear of starving to death... thus the pursuit of true love... yet, people still dont!!!

Agree that when there is love, there is a way but sometimes the way means the one you love most may not get the best out of the situation. That's why sometimes we don't marry number one but two, three, four etc.

Originally Posted by _AXL_

no foundation laid for their love shack, thus it crumbles at the first testing storm... cause and effect...

Pre-cast foundation left to support for life also not a good idea. All foundations need patchwork, upgrades and regular maintenance. Else, East and West wings will need to be sought out to ensure future erections are satisfied.

Originally Posted by _AXL_

so i charge it to your tab then...

Go ahead... I have high limits on this one.

[_AXL_]

Originally Posted by surfer888

Agree that when there is love, there is a way but sometimes the way means the one you love most may not get the best out of the situation. That's why sometimes we don't marry number one but two, three, four etc.

oh, ok... i didnt think of the possibility that the feeling might not be mutual...

Pre-cast foundation left to support for life also not a good idea. All foundations need patchwork, upgrades and regular maintenance. Else, East and West wings will need to be sought out to ensure future erections are satisfied

.

maintenance is of course needed, but good, honest, strong foundations must still be laid so that the upgrades and maintenance r worth the efforts, right? however, that would also not prevent the future erections of the other wings, cos for men not to try funny stunts, it is best for them not to get rich. or else, hell will break lose, no matter what... we r creatures built to create anarchy!!! it is in our blood to want to sow as much wild oats as possible...

Go ahead... I have high limits on this one

ok then, since u have given me the green light to overcharge u...

[surfer888]

Originally Posted by _AXL_

oh, ok... i didnt think of the possibility that the feeling might not be mutual...

oh... and that too.

Originally Posted by _AXL_

.

?

Originally Posted by _AXL_

maintenance is of course needed, but good, honest, strong foundations must still be laid so that the upgrades and maintenance r worth the efforts, right? however, that would also not prevent the future erections of the other wings,

I believe most of us keep laying the foundation repeatedly before fully satisfied. The trouble is very little maintenance done after that.

The West wings... ah... new and much to explore. We lay the foundation repeatedly again till the next erection. East wing next and the cycle goes on. One fine day, forced maintenance comes up courtesy of the building charter.

Originally Posted by _AXL_

cos for men not to try funny stunts, it is best for them not to get rich. or else, hell will break lose, no matter what... we r creatures built to create anarchy!!! it is in our blood to want to sow as much wild oats as possible...

Perhaps it was DESTINED not to get rich in order not to cause mayhem.

[_AXL_]

Originally Posted by surfer888

The West wings... ah... new and much to explore. We lay the foundation repeatedly again till the next erection. East wing next and the cycle goes on. One fine day, forced maintenance comes up courtesy of the building charter.

hahaha... my construction company's paid up capital is $2. everything parked with holding company. too bad i knew of the info too late to save u...

Perhaps it was DESTINED not to get rich in order not to cause mayhem

perhaps, it was due to our love for mayhem that DESTINY decides to us to remain poor for life???

[surfer888]

Originally Posted by _AXL_

hahaha... my construction company's paid up capital is $2. everything parked with holding company. too bad i knew of the info too late to save u...

My NAV too high to ignore. Luckily still have little dividend running around.

Originally Posted by _AXL_

perhaps, it was due to our love for mayhem that DESTINY decides to us to remain poor for life???

thats probably why I'm still struggling to pay off my tab.

[_AXL_]

Originally Posted by surfer888

My NAV too high to ignore. Luckily still have little dividend running around.

still got dividend ah??? then, all is not lost!!! but err, what kind of dividend u talking about??? very suggestive leh!!!

thats probably why I'm still struggling to pay off my tab.

no wonder u always hide at home play PS with junior instead of coming out to party. but i never serve u papers to pay up what??? so, why worry about the mounting bills with me???

[surfer888]

Originally Posted by _AXL_

still got dividend ah??? then, all is not lost!!! but err, what kind of dividend u talking about??? very suggestive leh!!!



no wonder u always hide at home play PS with junior instead of coming out to party. but i never serve u papers to pay up what??? so, why worry about the mounting bills with me???

Of coz... my most prized dividend. PS is just nuturing that dividend.

[Xdecepticon]

Originally Posted by suteerak1099

just a reminder, if we take too much into account what the person next to us sees us.... we'll never be good enough. much less to say, life aint worth living for already.

Very true indeed. Why must we worry what others think of us? But human (especially woman) by nature tend to let others dictate our life. And it ultimately affect our relationship.

[JWNY]

An interesting & humourous read i picked up from Delphi...

JWNY

Women are congenital liars but don't blame them, they lie to themselves too. It is in the natural selection gene

When it comes to relationships, women are in charge of the selection process because they control access to sexuality -- they let men "in" -- so you'd think they'd know exactly why and how they choose their partners.

Woman chooses. That’s a fact. Majority of woman are the pursuees while the men try means and ways to win the holy grail of relationship. The affections of woman, And of course, sex.

But the problem is, women lie. They lie to men; they lie to themselves (and they are perfectly capable of believing their own lies).

If we ask any woman what she's looking for in a man, she'll come out with a long list of ennobling qualities: a sense of humor; a guy who's nice to her and treats her well; good values; a strong moral character, etc.


Uh huh. Right. And she'll leave footprints all over Mr. Sense of Humor as she scrambles to be first in line when an arrogant, philandering, doctor roars up in his Ferrari.

Let's be honest -- if women really chose men based on what they say they're looking for, then every nice, average guy out there would be besieged with females trying to go out with him. But nice, average guys generally stay home on the weekends surfing on the PC.

Many women lie. They are experts at self-deceit because if they ever admitted to themselves what they really want from men, then they'd be forced to acknowledge that they don't really want a "nice" guy.

I always watch what a woman does, rather than what she says. And what does she actually do? When it comes to choosing men, she heads straight for the cash. What women want most from men -- and therefore the criterion most significant to them in selecting a mate -- is money or the assurance of thereof in the future. That’s probably why guys with a bigger house have an edge over the poor live-with-parents-kid. And guys driving Lexuses have an edge over bus or MRT riders

Some might argue that a man with a bachelor’s pad provides more chances for intimacy. Or a man with a car can spent more time with his woman. He can pick her up after work, after school and isolate her for more time together. Some might even say that the closeness within an enclosed area (ie: Car, room) led to higher level of intimacy. Unfortunately, less materially endowed men cannot afford that level of luxury. Nor time.

Forget the emotional aspects. For the majority of women, dating and marriage are businesses. Most woman marry up, not down. When a woman says all the good ones are taken, she means all the ones with money. The man who sells her newspapers might very well be a great guy capable of loving her dearly, but she wouldn't even consider him as a potential suitor because he doesn't have enough earning power.

Some women are blatant about their mercenary choices, openly choosing men with substantial material assets that they can exploit. But most are subconscious hypocrites, screening out less successful men without admitting it to themselves. They publicly announce that all they want is a nice guy, but privately disregard any men who don't meet their elevated standards for money, success, and status.

Of course, from the flip side of the story, in this time and world today, woman and men has almost similar earning capabilities. Men who do not earn more than woman can fall under the psychological barrier of not being capable enough for their partner. That may led to low self-esteem when comparisons are drawn. Woman can say that that is an undesirable character flaw. Hence, giving the woman cause to the rejection of that man.

I will not argue against that, for it takes a person of very strong character to project an image of confidence in a negative backdrop. Men with low earning power can barely project a façade of power.

It’s a materialistic world we live in.

[suteerak1099]

Originally Posted by Xdecepticon

Very true indeed. Why must we worry what others think of us? But human (especially woman) by nature tend to let others dictate our life. And it ultimately affect our relationship.

then i suppose there's probably a 2 options to take lor...
1) choose 1 who's wise enough not to be affected by other's perceptions
2) teach her to wise up & not be affected by other's perceptions

[Xdecepticon]

Originally Posted by suteerak1099

1) choose 1 who's wise enough not to be affected by other's perceptions
2) teach her to wise up & not be affected by other's perceptions

Its easy say than done especially when I with ex for so many years. Found it difficult to live without her. Love is blind. Been giving in to her too many occasion. A stubborn gil. Earlier on should have let her go but instead now I kenna dumped for good.

[JWNY]

Originally Posted by Xdecepticon

Found it difficult to live without her. Love is blind. Been giving in to her too many occasion.

Agree and at times not only is love not reciprocated (albeit "unconditional") but taken for granted...or us guys too sensitive ?

JWNY