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Matters of the Heart. Has a Commercial Fuck turned into a torrid Love Affair which has turned your life upside down? Fear not. We have experts here who can help you through your roller coaster ride. Tell us your story and we'll do our best to help.

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  #13966  
Old 25-05-2012, 12:32 PM
vietboy vietboy is offline
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Re: Understanding Vietnamese Life Partner

Quote:
Originally Posted by lkyin1 View Post
yes, i agreed that they r very stubborn.....die die muz do their way....haiz....need alot of time and patience to slowly let them adapt
U need to give them those 2 since they are our wifes.
  #13967  
Old 25-05-2012, 12:37 PM
vietboy vietboy is offline
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Re: Understanding Vietnamese Life Partner

Quote:
Originally Posted by shysaint View Post
Every traditional method will have its own use and effectiveness ... It up to the individual to try and see if it's useful or effective ...

To us living in a modern society, we will find such acts disgusting .. funny .. stupid or SURE not effective and etc ...

In reverse, to people living in a NOT modern society will find the western medicine not effective .. they would rather try their own traditional medicine and way to find cure ...

Sometimes I feel its the thought and not the method , so we need to be very aware in such situation.
agreed with u!


Quote:
Originally Posted by shysaint View Post
another example I wanna share is regarding my wife ... during her confinement ... my MIL will go buy or find 1 type of tree branches and leave, she would boil them hot with steam coming out. My wife will then remove all her clothings and hide inside a big blacnket together with the pot of boil tree brances and leaves. It's like steam sauna ... after that she will use the water in the pot to shower.
thought this method is for high fever? I did that when i was down with high fever in VN.
  #13968  
Old 25-05-2012, 12:51 PM
vietboy vietboy is offline
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Re: Understanding Vietnamese Life Partner

Quote:
Originally Posted by Blast88 View Post
In certain extent, yes some time they are stubborn but what I feel are majority lacking of self-confidence. Eg, Once we went to a shopping mall & my bx enter a lingerie shop with a chinese sales girl to buy bra & underwear, although she can converse quite well in mandarin & cantonese but she still shy to ask, thinking people might not understand her & end of the day I need to ask on her behalf regards to cup sizes, material make, patterns, how much, etc, it make me so 'pai sei' & I dare not make any eye contact with the sales girl during the whole buying process.
Initially i also same like u feel very pai sei when i 1st went shopping for bras with my wife. But after that i think to myself: hey she is yur wife what is so pai sei about buying lingerie with her. Now I even help my wife buy "pads" at ntuc.
  #13969  
Old 25-05-2012, 01:02 PM
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shysaint shysaint is offline
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Re: Understanding Vietnamese Life Partner

Quote:
Originally Posted by vietboy View Post
Now I even help my wife buy "pads" at ntuc.
I use to do that .. but now no more unless runs out ... when she comes over, she will buy and stock up enough ... she says here not suitable for her
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  #13970  
Old 25-05-2012, 04:41 PM
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Re: Understanding Vietnamese Life Partner

There is something to be said for traditional remedies. Eating unripe bananas for stomach upsets might be beneficial. Every one knows that bananas, prunes and papayas are good for our digestion. Rubbing a coin on one's self when one has a headache might be an effective distraction from the headache itself. There's also the placebo effect.
  #13971  
Old 25-05-2012, 05:29 PM
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Re: Understanding Vietnamese Life Partner

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Originally Posted by shysaint View Post
I use to do that .. but now no more unless runs out ... when she comes over, she will buy and stock up enough ... she says here not suitable for her
Not suitable??
  #13972  
Old 25-05-2012, 06:06 PM
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SingViet SingViet is offline
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Re: Understanding Vietnamese Life Partner

Quote:
Originally Posted by shysaint View Post
I use to do that .. but now no more unless runs out ... when she comes over, she will buy and stock up enough ... she says here not suitable for her
My ba xa also same. Her pads are all from vn. Whenever we go vn, we will go Coopmart and buy her pads. She buys for herself and the maid. Buy so many packets till i feel paiseh at cashier.
  #13973  
Old 26-05-2012, 10:06 AM
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Re: Understanding Vietnamese Life Partner

Quote:
Originally Posted by SingViet View Post
My ba xa also same. Her pads are all from vn. Whenever we go vn, we will go Coopmart and buy her pads. She buys for herself and the maid. Buy so many packets till i feel paiseh at cashier.

There was once my own luggage bag was fill full of pad.Was thinking which ICA officer was lucky to open mine and check.sure huat one haha

Luckily was not heavy item or else sure over weight one.She say is cheap over there so i also encourage her to buy more
  #13974  
Old 26-05-2012, 10:13 AM
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Re: Understanding Vietnamese Life Partner

Quote:
Originally Posted by Blast88 View Post
In certain extent, yes some time they are stubborn but what I feel are majority lacking of self-confidence. Eg, Once we went to a shopping mall & my bx enter a lingerie shop with a chinese sales girl to buy bra & underwear, although she can converse quite well in mandarin & cantonese but she still shy to ask, thinking people might not understand her & end of the day I need to ask on her behalf regards to cup sizes, material make, patterns, how much, etc, it make me so 'pai sei' & I dare not make any eye contact with the sales girl during the whole buying process.
It really depends on each person personality,my bx can talk to anybody and any race,from sell fish uncle in the market to ang mo,she also can talk.Maybe is her own personality that she is not shy and dare to ask or talk.

But end of the day,girl will always be girl,they still need a man beside to cover for them when lightning strike outside no matters how strong headed or stubborn they all.
  #13975  
Old 26-05-2012, 10:26 AM
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Re: Understanding Vietnamese Life Partner

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Originally Posted by shysaint View Post
To me and IMHO, You could have handed the situation in wrong way ... whether or not its works .. u have to understand that it is not the method that counts.. it is that 'THOUGHT or INTENTION' that you have to know ..

dun say they are vietnamese la , if she is a Singapore Gal .. she will also not happy ...

Maybe we can reverse the scenerio ... u use a CHinese method to treat her becasue u are into chinese medince, lets say u give her drink a very bitter medicine .. when u bring the bowl of medicine to her mouth, she push your hand away without explaining ... tell us .. HOW will you FEEL?

I always share that we have to understand the culture how Vietnameses shows their concern to their love ones ... it may not be the way that we want or in the way it is express in our culture .. its their cultures to show their way of concerns to you ,

They are brought up in such a way and in such a method ...

we are brought up in our singapore ways and cultures ..

the QN is "IS OUR CULTURES AND WAYS OF DOING THINGS CORRECT"
The reason why i push away her hand is because she insist on doing to me even though i repeat again and again that i dont want.When i am sick,i have no strength to explain to her even though i know is her goodwill and thought

Like what bro singviet mention about the fish sauce incident,sometime we must be firm on what we think is correct but i also agreed sometime small things we as a husband have to compromise.
  #13976  
Old 26-05-2012, 10:32 AM
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Re: Understanding Vietnamese Life Partner

For me is very simple,whether is our culture or their culture,as long as one is comfortable with,then just follow.Whether is right or wrong depends on how that person judge cos both of us come from different background.
  #13977  
Old 26-05-2012, 10:36 AM
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Re: Understanding Vietnamese Life Partner

Quote:
Originally Posted by Blast88 View Post
The reason given by my bx is she feel phobia when train go undertunnel & that deter her from taking mrt. Question is not about the affordability to take taxi, why not save up the money & buy somethings useful for our son
Is a valid reason why she cant take MRT,but did she try taking a bus?Did u teach or bring her along?But if u drive her around frequently,how is she going to learn to take a bus?
  #13978  
Old 26-05-2012, 10:39 AM
Golden question Golden question is offline
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Re: Understanding Vietnamese Life Partner

[QUOTE=Blast88;7253056]
Quote:
Originally Posted by Golden question View Post

No point arguing with her on taking taxi issues & this are little part I need to accomodate. Some time thinking it over she left her family & married me here, undergoing hardship & suffering when giving birth to our son, I need to forgo all these.
Decision is yours,if u think your financially can manage cos taxi nowadays is not cheap
  #13979  
Old 26-05-2012, 10:50 AM
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Re: Understanding Vietnamese Life Partner

Quote:
Originally Posted by Honey Boon View Post
this method got use ..... not only viet do that, Khmer and PRC also doing that .... can release your "poisons" or "heat" in your body that causing all the problems. My MIL (malaysian) doing that for me when I am sick, use a procelein spoon and johnson baby oil.... after that, I feel much better and can sleep well
The reason why i feel disgusting is because usually coin is not clean and i feel by contacting the metal things to her blood is not clean.Maybe i can accept if she use a procelain spoon and johnson baby oil.

She will rub her skin,back and hand,to redness and tear until the blood can be seen.To see her is such a state hurts me cos is like kana whip by a cane.

To me is her own ways of doing things or culture even though i dont like but as long as she feel better,i just let her do cos is her own body,only she know best
  #13980  
Old 26-05-2012, 01:33 PM
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Re: Understanding Vietnamese Life Partner

Quote:
Originally Posted by shysaint View Post
Those highly educated can be working in office , quantity surveyor ...
There are few vietnamese gals working as IT engineers in my company. They took scholarships to come sgp uni and then found a job
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