Understanding Vietnamese Life Partner

[vietboy]

Originally Posted by Kim91

Oh ya forgot have a ngan infront.. Sin loi sin loi bay gio em hieu roi

Troi, u wrote it yurself u forgot what u wrote??

[Golden question]

Originally Posted by SingViet

Seriously speaking, vietnamese spouse do face bias almost everywhere they go in Singapore. I won't start to mention again on what kind of statements singaporeans make on them. But my wife do not really care how they perceive her as long as what she does is correct.

after many years of staying in sg,she now will talk back if necessary even though she is alone,this show how tough is vietnamese woman.I always comfort her by telling her that a foreigner will surely get bully in a foreign land,is the same as me in vietnam,the vietnamese will bully me.But she also make some good singaporean friends through her friendlyness

[Golden question]

Originally Posted by SingViet

One of my wife's friend, a 24 year old Viet lady married to a Singaporean man and with a 3 year old daughter. This young lady has been spending a lot of time with my wife and listening to my wife's advice. Just 2 weeks ago, she had some problem with her husband and my wife and i spent the whole afternoon talking to them. From what i see, this lady is different from the rest and can be taught. But all things come back to square one, she's bored and she requested her husband let her go back to VN for 1 month. Her husband works on 2 jobs, 16 hours a day and made barely enough to support her. She insisted on going back and her husband borrowed from friends to let her go back. When my wife and i were in VN, we gave her a call. Damm it, she's gambling at home. Tell me about all the time i spent on counselling her, its useless. Went back there and all bad habits come back.

My experience with Vietnam goes this way, initally was something fresh, very interesting. Then came realisation stage when i started to realise lots of things about their country and culture and now, the immune stage when i have no feeling for that country, its just a place for me to earn money.

haha bro,i went through all this stage before during my early years so can share the same sentiment with u

[vietboy]

Originally Posted by SingViet

One thing that i really salute you, you make the effort to find out more about vn. Keep up the good work.

Me 2! Salute u jackbl! Gotta learn from u!

[vietboy]

Originally Posted by SingViet

Bro vietboy, i not shooting you hor.

No prob! No war within our members of our fb group.

[vietboy]

Originally Posted by Kim91

Wah uncle singviet then u shooting me la?? Just joking.. I just feel that that to understand our wife n culture its a must to immerse in them=food n language. But even if u understand language then let them know esp if trying to know them. Then u can hear if they talk anything bad not. Its the same for our wifes. They tried hard to pick up our language fast n they are good at it. But they dun like sing food. Sad i dunno how to feed my wife with....

What uncle? He not even 40 yet!

My view is to immerse in their food n language to learn their culture is not enough. We need to understand their way of living, their religions, their beliefs n values also.

Yur wife dun like sing food??
1st time hearing this. Actually our chinese food is close to theirs, they shld be able to accept chinese food. Indian n malay food are a bit heavy on the spices so may not 合他们的口味.
Give her some time to adapt lah. Slowly she will accept. If she still can't eat local food, then get her to cook her food herself loh.

[KangTuo]

Originally Posted by Kim91

sometimes I feel we spoilt our own market by allowing us being their atm. Eg. Cheonging times/Dating times buy ex gift for them spend lavishly, giving them think we earn fast bucks.

many people spoilt markets buying iphone 3s/4/4s, ipad, give tips in 100s and spend lavishly buy bringing vb to romantice dinner... just to get under their skirt.

Originally Posted by SingViet

Many singaporean an like to boast to their viet gf how much they earn. S$2000 to them is a lot of money roi, but they do not know the cost of living in singapore.

i don't boast to my bx, i don't hide from my bx.. i tell her the amount i earn but also educate her on the cost of living in Singapore. Anyway she saw it herself already.. i.e she feel heart pain when i spend $200 on groceries and food over the weekend.

Originally Posted by SingViet

doting your wife is a must but we must let them know that they need to adapt to the food and lifestyle here after marrying here. They cannot be asking for everything vietnamese after marrying here. ...... Many viet spouse use `not used to lifestyle here' as reason to go back VN so often, and always staying for a month or so. If this happens much too often, the chances of her having a viet bf there is very high.

my bx is slowly adapting to alot of food here... recently she keep craving for roti prata

as for letting bx go back vn and staying long there... i got no worries about her getting a viet bf.. as i know it won't happen. my bx is more worry that i fool around when she not by my side for too long.

[KangTuo]

Originally Posted by vietboy

Yur wife dun like sing food??
1st time hearing this. Actually our chinese food is close to theirs

ask you to come out often and know more vb liao but you no go ....
many vb in gl/jc also not use to sillypore chinese food.

there are all kind of vb from syt to milf with different thinking, taste, attitude... you see more, you know more

[Hurricane88]

Originally Posted by KangTuo

many people spoilt markets buying iphone 3s/4/4s, ipad, give tips in 100s and spend lavishly buy bringing vb to romantice dinner... just to get under their skirt.

i don't boast to my bx, i don't hide from my bx.. i tell her the amount i earn but also educate her on the cost of living in Singapore. Anyway she saw it herself already.. i.e she feel heart pain when i spend $200 on groceries and food over the weekend.

I love this policy...dun boast to your gf or bx...me always tell gf I am very poor man...salaried workers...dun expect much from me except able to provide food and lodging...haha...one thing can assure her is monthly trips to hcm...showed her my passports and all the chops...she counted more than 50 chops...

[vietboy]

Originally Posted by superhuman

dun understand why they can pick up mandarin so fast. There are countless of vb I have seen that can speak mandarin with ease.

Is it really that simple, then why angmos learn until tongue swollen. Whereas we find it so difficult to learn

U shld go to this "Tieng Viet Lovers" thread. There have discussed this before.
Have u noticed that their words have the same number of syllabus as chinese? E.g. Quan tam = 关心
An com = 吃饭
Noi chuyen = 讲话
Mong tai = 指甲
To name a few.
Also TV have 6 音 quite similar to chinese 4 音. English dun have thus they have difficulty in learning and picking up chinese.

[vietboy]

Originally Posted by Kim91

Hah not issue meh? I very worried lor. Dunno if breakfast she got eat not as she dun like bread and our usual breakfast food; she dun like our noodles etc. she only like rice like chcken rice duck rice com chao not much choice unless eat zhi char.. Sianz. Very worried esp when she pregnant how let her eat properly n happily..
Husband n wife liao then nothing to hide liao. Its more when starting better to be careful listen to what they talk=防人之心不可无 bro.. Based on previous relationship.

Wa, yur wife pregnant already still let her eat outside food ha? Not too good for the baby leh. Outside food not that nutrious leh. U must not only take care of the big, small one also must take care. Also everyday eat outside not expensive meh? Here not like VN leh where eat is cheap.

i always mentioned here, if u dun trust yur wife, why marry her in the 1st place??

[Kim91]

Of cos i trust my wife if not i wun marry her liao lo. I known her thru my ex gf which i treated her with all the worng methods. Spend so much on her, give in to her then she still treat me like dirt, feltreally khong or kana black magic. Thats why hope those bro still dating only dun repeat my mistake. lucky is i know my wife thru her.
My wife n family treat me very nice, they know i not rich. N good thing parents are hardworking farmers.

[Kim91]

Of cos i trust my wife if not i wun marry her liao lo. I known her thru my ex gf which i treated her with all the worng methods. Spend so much on her, give in to her then she still treat me like dirt, feltreally khong or kana black magic. Thats why hope those bro still dating only dun repeat my mistake. lucky is i know my wife thru her.
My wife n family treat me very nice, they know i not rich. N good thing parents are hardworking farmers.

[Kim91]

[QUOTE=vietboy;7324091]Wa, yur wife pregnant already still let her eat outside food ha? Not too good for the baby leh. Outside food not that nutrious leh.

No one at home to cook for her all working ma. Bo bian.. Then the preg didnt go smooth, she is weak and always bleed haiz.. Btw the time bring her mum here also too late liao damn sad..
Now hope to try again also sad, dunno what to do.

[Blast88]

[QUOTE=Kim91;7324301]

Originally Posted by vietboy

Wa, yur wife pregnant already still let her eat outside food ha? Not too good for the baby leh. Outside food not that nutrious leh.

No one at home to cook for her all working ma. Bo bian.. Then the preg didnt go smooth, she is weak and always bleed haiz.. Btw the time bring her mum here also too late liao damn sad..
Now hope to try again also sad, dunno what to do.

Hi Bro,

Don't be sad, take things slowly at a time, my bx also like yours when she 1st came to s'pore 2 year ago, always sad, home sick, feel lonely especially during the period when she got pregnant so in order to keep her time occupied when I'm working, I applied for her the passion card & registered her to various short courses at our CC, eg. basic english lang. , cooking, line dance, basic computer, yoga, etc all these not only help to occupied her time but also allow her to make more frd, upgrade her knowledge & skills.