Today, i have gone to DSC, AFA for my final HIV confirmation test. The past few months have been torturous to me since the condom broke in that commercial sex activity in Malaysia . Perhaps, that event saves my life instead and wakes up me up totally. I promise myself if i am proven negative today, i will do a write up in this forum to educate my fellow forumers who might still be lost in their life.
In the year 2000, i am still innocent and have at most visited some stripping bar in States. After starting to read the forum, i remember visiting Debbie in Executive Spa for the first time of my life. Eventually, i have many other sexual activities in China where i have many girlfriends. I started to indulge in sex and lost control. I came back from China to Singapore and found myself a decent job with decent pay. However, soon i discover my fellow colleagues like to go to HC and visit freelancer frequently. Being influenced, i start going to frequent HC. Paradiz soon turns out to be our favourite hunting ground. I also started to visit KTV, started off with Dynasty, then Tuberose and then MG..... I even get to know some gals from Dynasty. I even fell in love with a couple of them. I even dare to do it raw once to one of the gals. I thought it is love but i never know i am challenging fate and my destiny might just change due to 10 mins of folly. One day after having sex with one of the gals, i discover my penis is full of red dots. I panicked and visited my doctor. He diagnosed that i have contracted fungus. He insisted that i take STD tests and take HIV tests as well. I turn down the HIV test and took the STD test unwillingly. It turns out i am negative. However, i never know i am just negative for VD but not the rest of the STD like Herpes and Genital Wart.
I didn't change and continue cheonging. I frequent HC almost every week and sometimes twice per week. I am getting out of control. Besides HC, i go to KTV as well. It has been good life for me since i have quite a bit of salary and feel that i deserve to enjoy myself. However, things change suddenly August last year.
My friend and i make a trip to one of the LSBs in Malaysia. I never intend to have sex there but boredom brings me to play the Russian Roulette yet again. Believing my luck is forever good, i try again and this time, to my dismay, my condom broke. I am devastated. I also notice there are some cuts on my penis head. I am dead worried. I spend my whole night reading
http://www.thebody.com. I try to find ways to console myself and try to tell myself it is okie. Condom break rarely leads to HIV. I keep telling myself. However, a job assignment to China forces me to take a blood test. Rather than failing the blood test in China, i force myself to go to AFA to take annoymous HIV test instead. It has been 30 days since the incident last happened then. I went in and take my blood test. Inside the room, i am very emotionally upset. I believe i have a bright future ahead and now my future might just have ended. I talked and talked to the counsellor and hope that he can provide me with solution to my problems. Inevitably, i still did the blood test. I went out and waited for 10 mins. It is one of the worst 10 mins of my life. I could not even sit still. Soon, i was called into the room again and told that i am tested -ve. I feel that life has hope again. However, i am not sure i have waited enough time for the test. I kept pestering him about the test.
Many of us have taken the test without knowing much about the test. The test for AFA is actually a rapid test that makes use of Elisa that checks for anti-body. There is no such test in States becoz of patent issues. The test checks for 2 strains of virus, HIV1 & 2. This HIV rapid test from Abbott Lab is one of the proven tests out there and has been donated to the WHO. Out of the experiments that have been taken in Africa, the accuracy rate is 99.99%. The rapid test requires a window period of at least 28 days. If tested negative beyond 28 days, the person is at least 99.99% hiv negative. This is contrary to the Western Bloc test which requires a window period of 3 months to prove a person is 99% negative. The rapid test is very accurate for negative tests but might cause false positive. If a person is positive, another rapid test will be taken. If it is positive again, blood sample will be taken from the person and sent to the lab to do a Western Bloc test to confirm the person's HIV status. The person's identity is being kept confidential throughout the whole process.
After this episode, i told myself i must go clean. I went on to do more STD tests. To my dismay, i discover i contacted Herpes, although i don't have symptoms. The worst thing is i have always used condom except that one time. I still have the ongoing sexual urge, so i try to go for HJ instead of BJ/FJ. To my surprise, i just discover you can get genital wart from HJ. You can read the DSC brochures on STD to confirm. I just found out today, i also contacted genital wart. I am very upset. I decide to go for my final confirmation HIV test.
Today is yet again another negative, of course, after yet another horrific 10 mins wait. I believe the superior being up there has been very kind to me and i believe i am given time to do much more meaningful things than just to have sex. I have kept clean for the past 3 months. There has been one occasion that i have a gal naked beside me and i am surprised i rejected her. She calls me a weirdo. In fact, she is quite chio and young.
It's time that I have my life back, i hope i don't need to go back to DSC for annoymous HIV test again. I hate that kind of 10 mins wait. I am sick of such kind of life. I don't want to lose my future to 10 mins of insanity where my small head controls my big head. Even if i don't think of myself, i need to think of my girlfriend and my family. I still want to settle down one day and have kids. I don't want to infect my girlfren or my future wife with STD and worse still, HIV or AIDS.
I know heavan has been kind to me, although i got herpes and warts through the whole adventure, at least, i didn't get something that ruins my entire life. These disease shall always serve as a reminder to my wild past.