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asdfghjkl
25-12-2006, 03:48 AM
On Christmas Eve, I was listening to my best friend comparing about his previous GF and the present one. He told me his ex used to scold him all the time.. must give way to her.. and that made him feel more like a wimp than a man.. now his present GF always listen to him and let him decide on issues.. and he feels like a real man in this relationship..

After listening, I gave it some thought and I felt puzzled by one thing. Is a man really a man based on others and not on oneself? Can others influence you to be a man or wimp?

What do you say?

JWNY
25-12-2006, 04:03 AM
Self-esteem issue...some MEN like to "wear the pants at home"...but some men don't mind letting the women be in charge

(she who holds the gear stick is queen...or king?) ;)

JWNY

yankim3
25-12-2006, 10:35 AM
hmm, i got friends like that also, the gf calling all the shot, he wan to play mahjong with us, he got to cox his gf to sleep then slowly slip out to play, haiz, it takes 2 hands to clap. for me, i nev let my wife rule over me, but got to respect them also la. now i can play mahjong or do what ever i wan to do. shes ok with it. :)

qw2op
25-12-2006, 10:38 AM
... my best friend comparing about his previous GF and the present one. He told me his ex used to scold him all the time.. must give way to her.. and that made him feel more like a wimp than a man.. now his present GF always listen to him and let him decide on issues.. and he feels like a real man in this relationship..

my interpretation on dis ...

ur friend has more patience/better-@-give-n-take/better upbringing than his ex ...

ur friend's ex is of ze very much full of herself/evrythin-oso-must-win/dun-noe-how-2-give-n-take type ...

n ur fren dun feel gd dat way ...


Is a man really a man based on others and not on oneself? Can others influence you to be a man or wimp?

wen others praise u ... wen others show u respect ... wen others show dey look up 2 u ... ... u happy or nt? ...

un4tunately, in ur place, a lot of ppl lack self-esteem n self-worth ... dey hv 2 whack others (wen dey themselves noe nuts) 2 bring themselves up n inflate their ego ... (dun ask me y lidat, dat's a deeper, but root issue) ...

how many ppl can c their own self-worth n maintain dat outlook?


on ze other hand ... ur fren may nt want 2 tell her off straight 2 her face ... unlike his ex ... 4 reasons like wat me mentioned above ...


my 2.14 cents worth ... (gst increased 2 7% hor ...)

sinsxy
25-12-2006, 11:06 AM
when will the comparing stop ? if you find it suffocating....tell her and see whats the reaction. if she cant accept...then maybe it's time to move on with another....

Mr Canon
25-12-2006, 11:24 AM
As a whole, it's better to be in control rather than being control, right? That's just my personal opinion.

Kyser Soze
25-12-2006, 11:46 AM
Respect is the word. We are grown-up adults already. Do we still need relentless scolding like we were 12 year-old kids? Men don't need that. We need women who are understanding enough, be it personal or on bed. :D It doesn't need a rocket scientist to figure this out.

Castrol
25-12-2006, 12:04 PM
After listening, I gave it some thought and I felt puzzled by one thing. Is a man really a man based on others and not on oneself? Can others influence you to be a man or wimp?

What do you say?

when a horny man needs a fuck, he will do whatever the gf or wife asks him to, even barking like a dog or weeping like a wimp. but after cumming, the man is back on top. and the woman got to resume her duty and wrap the tissue on the wet cock for the man. :D

Da Vinci
25-12-2006, 12:10 PM
A true man is inside ur heart.....

sometimes, when man pamper the gal, its not that he is a wimp, but cos' he loves her! and wan her to be pampered.

man who knows how to treat a lady well, is a TRUE MAN

onion_rings
25-12-2006, 12:16 PM
the woman got to resume her duty and wrap the tissue on the wet cock for the man. :D
Worried that the kuku bird caught a cold?:p

=WK=
25-12-2006, 12:31 PM
...

After listening, I gave it some thought and I felt puzzled by one thing. Is a man really a man based on others and not on oneself? Can others influence you to be a man or wimp?

What do you say?

for a relationship to work, both sides must give and take... basically its a compromise. if a man gives in to his gf or wife, it does not mean he is a wimp... thus, in my opinion it is based on oneself :cool:

Castrol
25-12-2006, 12:41 PM
Worried that the kuku bird caught a cold?:p

of course, dont forget our kuku bird got no feathers or fur... :D

goodielecks
25-12-2006, 04:28 PM
A true man is inside ur heart.....

sometimes, when man pamper the gal, its not that he is a wimp, but cos' he loves her! and wan her to be pampered.

man who knows how to treat a lady well, is a TRUE MAN

So in other words a true man is a SNAG? Whereas the old fashioned chauvinist isnt a true man?

Merry X'mas to all:)

tunkudon
25-12-2006, 05:17 PM
man is man. you control. respect still respect. there is nothing cal fair. cause the world is not fair. :D

tunkudon
25-12-2006, 05:21 PM
man is still man . we are the one that take control. but we still must respect the weaker one. :D

yankim3
25-12-2006, 05:37 PM
when my wife is sick, having fever, the whole night, i apply towel soaked with ice water to cold her down. cos i love her and wan her to recover asap. but i can be very firmed on things when she cross the line.

Scrubber
25-12-2006, 05:49 PM
A man needs from a woman what his underwear provides. A little bit of support and a little bit of freedom. :)

onion_rings
25-12-2006, 06:37 PM
of course, dont forget our kuku bird got no feathers or fur... :D
True true.... though not much but we still have those public hair to replace those feathers & fur....No wonder we need tissue afterall :D

yohooo
25-12-2006, 10:16 PM
I guess it's a matter of character? That's why the ladies like to call those 'bossy' man male chauvinist and another kind the SNAG(sensitive new age guy). It's down to that basic 'male instinct' of dominance i think. :D

newbadass
26-12-2006, 12:36 AM
I've been through this shit. I know.

If not happy, then don't continue the relationship. Love is not enough. Why should love make you miserable? If the girl is not possible to live with, then tell her to fuck off. She can only blame herself.

If someone is happy when they're with you, they'll want to be with you. If they're not happy being with you, then they won't want to be with you. Very simple rule, but so few people realise....

angie II
31-12-2006, 01:07 PM
I guess it's a matter of character? That's why the ladies like to call those 'bossy' man male chauvinist and another kind the SNAG(sensitive new age guy). It's down to that basic 'male instinct' of dominance i think.

pardon me brudderr 4 being crude but lanchooo! 2 try 2 be a SNAG juz 2 please the gal u r after.. 2 me is PUI.. MEN where r ur ballz? did u leave them at home? wheres ur pride n ego? ok la so u can label me as old fashioned or MCP (male chauvinist pig).. so wad? It may not end well afterall for u right? If things dun go ur way wudn't u feel like an idiot? ARRIGATO! :D


I've been through this shit. I know.

If not happy, then don't continue the relationship. Love is not enough. Why should love make you miserable? If the girl is not possible to live with, then tell her to fuck off. She can only blame herself.

^5


If someone is happy when they're with you, they'll want to be with you. If they're not happy being with you, then they won't want to be with you. Very simple rule, but so few people realise....

itz not dat dey didn't realise.. itz becuz dey REFUSED 2 accept REJECTION :p
.

lacoruna69
31-12-2006, 03:44 PM
All these SNAG stuff is pure bull shit! SG women are used to having it all. Just because they are born in SG. You know why SG ladies looked down on SG men?? Becoz we want to be SNAG, just to please them........

tunkudon
31-12-2006, 03:48 PM
bravo..to all bro..man still is the one to control eveything hahahah

insomia
31-12-2006, 05:18 PM
sometimes man love a woman too much and man will give everything to the woman. thus, when giving and during giving. man only remember love. and woman will take things for granted. because easy thing easy come. free things mah. given for free ma. so they just control the man and make the man become a wimp. but by woman doing this make the man lose dignities. most of the men will mind but what to do because of love therefore never mind give in and give in. but it will never last for long. once men found out another gal who respect him and give in to him and let him decide then men will turn to the better one. all in all, men are still men would like to make decision when comes to decision making. of course now it is the 21th century. if a couple it involved a mutual discussion too. cheers. happy new year

angie II
31-12-2006, 08:45 PM
Self-esteem issue...some MEN like to "wear the pants at home"...but some men don't mind letting the women be in charge

JWNY

i agreed i like 2 be in charge all the time.. onli time she can be in charge of me is when in bed or FEMDOM (http://www.reference.com/browse/wiki/Female_dominance)

when will the comparing stop ? if you find it suffocating....tell her and see whats the reaction. if she cant accept...then maybe it's time to move on with another....

agreed bud with sum pui-soh like Lydia Sum the consequences cud be fatal.. they might get more den juz a PIAK.. a bearhug.

As a whole, it's better to be in control rather than being control, right? That's just my personal opinion.

agreed..

when a horny man needs a fuck, he will do whatever the gf or wife asks him to, even barking like a dog or weeping like a wimp. but after cumming, the man is back on top. and the woman got to resume her duty and wrap the tissue on the wet cock for the man.

dats born in us..

A true man is inside ur heart.....

sometimes, when man pamper the gal, its not that he is a wimp, but cos' he loves her! and wan her to be pampered.

man who knows how to treat a lady well, is a TRUE MAN

it reminded me of the word chee hong wen during courting n flirting..

Worried that the kuku bird caught a cold?

no comments.. cuz itz off topic.. :D

man is man. you control. respect still respect. there is nothing cal fair. cause the world is not fair.

fwah.. dis is farking true man..

I guess it's a matter of character? That's why the ladies like to call those 'bossy' man male chauvinist and another kind the SNAG(sensitive new age guy). It's down to that basic 'male instinct' of dominance i think.

he juz said it.. BASIC MALE INSTINCT OF DOMINANCE! brudderr sumday i buy u beer ok?

I've been through this shit. I know.

If not happy, then don't continue the relationship. Love is not enough. Why should love make you miserable? If the girl is not possible to live with, then tell her to fuck off. She can only blame herself.

If someone is happy when they're with you, they'll want to be with you. If they're not happy being with you, then they won't want to be with you. Very simple rule, but so few people realise....

how not 2 agree? cuz i oreadi liked his nick liao..

All these SNAG stuff is pure bull shit! SG women are used to having it all. Just because they are born in SG. You know why SG ladies looked down on SG men?? Becoz we want to be SNAG, just to please them........

agreed bud i dowan 2 be SNAG juz 2 please them unless shes a fairy or goddess..

What do you say?

i'd say.. wad ever happened 2 ur avatar?
.

gilagila100
31-12-2006, 10:44 PM
Errmmmss ... It's always a matter of respect ...

Nobody can tahan being with a person that is selfish and/or disrespects you ..

Staying in a relationship is a matter of compromise i.e. give and take ...
Give and takes doesn't mean you cannot have things done your way ... it juz mean you can have things 100% done your way sometimes but other times you do it your other half's way ... problems only occur when ppl demand that things be done their way always ...

Sigh, I had a similar experience b4 ... ended in a breakup ... it was never easy ... still hurts but tats the way things r ... some ppl r juz plain selfish n no amount of love or caring can change a person's personality ... :(

jng1103
31-12-2006, 11:35 PM
A true man is inside ur heart.....

sometimes, when man pamper the gal, its not that he is a wimp, but cos' he loves her! and wan her to be pampered.

man who knows how to treat a lady well, is a TRUE MAN

Absolultely rubbish... some women demand the sky and oceans. if her man cant fulfill, the grass is always greener outside. With wolves prawling around, it's not too difficult to catch her.

pamper women? my foot... i feel like puking whenever i see young punks carrying their women's handbags while shopping... u call that 'pamper'? a real man has his women at his words... not to be rude but with certain respect, not to pamper but with compromise. when i told my CO about the young punks, she volunteered to share my loads whenever she sees me carrying heavy stuffs... but as a man, i never let her carry heavy stuffs...

saw a young lad carrying a big banquet of flower on MRT... gezz... try to impress his woman with flowers? well, for young lads, may be... but that's kinda pathetic :rolleyes:

jimbo

sexster2006
31-12-2006, 11:40 PM
I feel that just strike a balance ...

You win some and you lose some ...

:)

surfer888
01-01-2007, 01:59 AM
A man needs from a woman what his underwear provides. A little bit of support and a little bit of freedom. :)

... and to carry his balls for that ego boost once in a while.

SexMan
01-01-2007, 08:57 AM
Hi,

I think it back to Respect & communication for both.

I alway give in to my wife ( bcos I lazy to quarrel with her) but sometime when she is too much, I will talk back.

Human ( man & gal) alway take thing for granted, if the guy alway give in & dont talk back, the gal will take thing for granted after sometime.

Once a while, we got to talk back, not to show that we r the man or in control , but to express our opinion.

Only then, this relation can last by communication

Thanks

asdfghjkl
01-01-2007, 09:46 AM
if a man gives in to his gf or wife, it does not mean he is a wimp.

i know give in is not la.. but hor.. if u saw a guy on the street who is being wacked by his GF/Wife and keep saying sorry.. u will think he a wimp or not ah.. especially those muscular guys with their very slim spouses.. i cannot stand their hand actions.. like gay man!

Red-Card
01-01-2007, 09:51 AM
Respect is very important in a relationship and certainly, there's no right or wrong in giving in.

asdfghjkl
01-01-2007, 10:17 AM
i'd say.. wad ever happened 2 ur avatar?

hehe.. u say ler ~ :rolleyes:

Know_yr_role
01-01-2007, 03:22 PM
Its quite a very good qn...In the society now, all women are looking out for a New Age Men....is there really such a thing? women doesnt want to jus be bounded in the kitchen and wants to walk out of their tiny rooms and be treated equally.....but tat doesnt means she "needs to wear the pants" in the r/s as many bros has already mentioned....

In a healthy r/s there are many factors to consider, facts tat makes a r/s work out, like communication between partners, respecting each other, giving each other spaces/privacy to a certain extend. All these factors will contribute in making r/s work....

Im not saying tat being a MCP and bossing the women in a r/s is bad nor good OR a wife controlling their husbands are good either......many different r/s has their own ways of working themselves out....

I personally has been a r/s where the woman is more bossy and the exact opposite where the women wants me to take control in everything.........

But come-on wat the bossy issues we are talking abt? If its who decides on wat to eat for dinner OR who should have control of ALL the money in the household?? There is a big difference when people talks abt being boss ard or hen-pecked husband...

wat im trying to say is, every r/s is different its really hard to have a clear judgement of whos "a true man" ....as long as u are happy in your r/s and sleeps well at nite, loving the women besides you, i think its all that matters.....

jus my 0.002cents, cheers!