i need some action tonight!!!

[ifonlyyoucould]

i'm getting quite tired of seeing posts stating that they're fit/handsome/leanmeanmachine what nots so here's a short (litereally) 'profile' of me.

I am fat
I am short when standing on 2 legs
I am short when lying down
I have no money
I am ugly
I am horny

I JUST NEED SOME ACTION TONIGHT!!!

pm me for contact number and we'll take it from there if there's any takers..

east siders would be awesome :)

cheerios