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17-06-2013, 12:30 PM
An honorable member of the Coffee Shop Has Just Posted the Following:
http://www.transitioning.org/wp-content/uploads/2013/06/joycelyn.jpg
Quote:
Spending Father’s Day with my daughter in Sydney last year
http://www.transitioning.org/2013/06...ney-last-year/ (http://www.transitioning.org/2013/06/16/spending-fathers-day-with-my-daughter-in-sydney-last-year/)
My daughter Joycelyn on the left with a friend at her prom night last year.
I spent Father’s Day with my 19-year-old daughter in downtown Sydney when I visited her last year in September.
Unfortunately, today I will be spending Father’s Day alone…
Unlike Singapore, Father’s Day is a big thing in Sydney – its like a national event.
Shopping malls all give discount to shoppers and restaurants mostly have Father’s Day meal offers.
The national papers also dedicated quite alot of pages to fathers and the radio stations allowed listeners to ask for songs to be played for their dads.
I find that Singaporeans only dedicate attention to mothers on Mother’s Day – leaving fathers much to the sidelines.
Its no wonder fathers seldom feel that they are appreciated for the role they have played within the family.
I have heard of many missing fathers within the family hierarchy here and maybe one of the reasons is that fathers seldom feel appreciated for the role they have played within the family – however minimal it may be.
Anyway, my daughter and I ate a $10-steak at one of the Chinatown restaurant and I was pleasantly surprised to receive a gift from my daughter – her first Father’s Day present to me.
Our family does not really like to celebrate any special occasions and sometimes I felt that this lack has taken out some of the warmth and love within the relationship.
Of course, I am not asking that we spend lavishly on such occasions but a lunch celebration or a small gift will really add alot of spice to the relationship.
This would also be my last formal celebration with my daughter before I return to Singapore – as a united family.
In future, I will see her just as a dad and no longer as the husband of her mum.
I will also see her much lesser due to the distance and divorce.
Its a sad and weird feeling really.
The divorce has curtail alot of our time together and that ironically has also cement our daughter-dad relationship.
I realise that she is treasuring whatever little time we have together and indeed the slogan absence makes the heart grows fonder rings very true here.
Previously, we dont really speak much to one another at home and will do our own stuff.
Sometimes, you will only treasure someone when he is not always there or if he is not around forever…
My daughter has grown to be a sweet pretty 18-year-old and though I cant see her
grow up on a daily basis – I will cherish whatever time we have together.
I also try to plan out what to impart to her whenever we met up so that the time spent together will be meaningful and life-changing.
Nevertheless, I still find it difficult to talk to her about the divorce without first choking and then chickening out.
Maybe another time – there is always an excuse whenever I wanted to bring it out to her.
Perhaps, its the fear of a positive response from her or that I am not composed enough to bring it out to her in the first place?
I know that most children are able to understand what has happened when their parents split and more so when my daughter is already a young adult but bringing the topic out in the open is really tough.
I guess it takes lots of courage and affirmation to bring out such a difficult subject to your children and if you have successfully done so – my kudos to you!
Amazingly, my daughter has asked me to sign on the divorce papers last week – perhaps at the urge of my wife as I have being delaying the processes for quite a while.
Nevertheless, as I return back to Singapore soon, I know that even though I cant see her every day, she will remain forever in my heart…
Editor’s Note: My daughter just texted me wishing me Happy Father’s Day and it made my day!!
Click here to view the whole thread at www.sammyboy.com (http://sammyboy.com/showthread.php?154642-Gilbert-Goh-s-Daughter-Quite-sweet&goto=newpost).
http://www.transitioning.org/wp-content/uploads/2013/06/joycelyn.jpg
Quote:
Spending Father’s Day with my daughter in Sydney last year
http://www.transitioning.org/2013/06...ney-last-year/ (http://www.transitioning.org/2013/06/16/spending-fathers-day-with-my-daughter-in-sydney-last-year/)
My daughter Joycelyn on the left with a friend at her prom night last year.
I spent Father’s Day with my 19-year-old daughter in downtown Sydney when I visited her last year in September.
Unfortunately, today I will be spending Father’s Day alone…
Unlike Singapore, Father’s Day is a big thing in Sydney – its like a national event.
Shopping malls all give discount to shoppers and restaurants mostly have Father’s Day meal offers.
The national papers also dedicated quite alot of pages to fathers and the radio stations allowed listeners to ask for songs to be played for their dads.
I find that Singaporeans only dedicate attention to mothers on Mother’s Day – leaving fathers much to the sidelines.
Its no wonder fathers seldom feel that they are appreciated for the role they have played within the family.
I have heard of many missing fathers within the family hierarchy here and maybe one of the reasons is that fathers seldom feel appreciated for the role they have played within the family – however minimal it may be.
Anyway, my daughter and I ate a $10-steak at one of the Chinatown restaurant and I was pleasantly surprised to receive a gift from my daughter – her first Father’s Day present to me.
Our family does not really like to celebrate any special occasions and sometimes I felt that this lack has taken out some of the warmth and love within the relationship.
Of course, I am not asking that we spend lavishly on such occasions but a lunch celebration or a small gift will really add alot of spice to the relationship.
This would also be my last formal celebration with my daughter before I return to Singapore – as a united family.
In future, I will see her just as a dad and no longer as the husband of her mum.
I will also see her much lesser due to the distance and divorce.
Its a sad and weird feeling really.
The divorce has curtail alot of our time together and that ironically has also cement our daughter-dad relationship.
I realise that she is treasuring whatever little time we have together and indeed the slogan absence makes the heart grows fonder rings very true here.
Previously, we dont really speak much to one another at home and will do our own stuff.
Sometimes, you will only treasure someone when he is not always there or if he is not around forever…
My daughter has grown to be a sweet pretty 18-year-old and though I cant see her
grow up on a daily basis – I will cherish whatever time we have together.
I also try to plan out what to impart to her whenever we met up so that the time spent together will be meaningful and life-changing.
Nevertheless, I still find it difficult to talk to her about the divorce without first choking and then chickening out.
Maybe another time – there is always an excuse whenever I wanted to bring it out to her.
Perhaps, its the fear of a positive response from her or that I am not composed enough to bring it out to her in the first place?
I know that most children are able to understand what has happened when their parents split and more so when my daughter is already a young adult but bringing the topic out in the open is really tough.
I guess it takes lots of courage and affirmation to bring out such a difficult subject to your children and if you have successfully done so – my kudos to you!
Amazingly, my daughter has asked me to sign on the divorce papers last week – perhaps at the urge of my wife as I have being delaying the processes for quite a while.
Nevertheless, as I return back to Singapore soon, I know that even though I cant see her every day, she will remain forever in my heart…
Editor’s Note: My daughter just texted me wishing me Happy Father’s Day and it made my day!!
Click here to view the whole thread at www.sammyboy.com (http://sammyboy.com/showthread.php?154642-Gilbert-Goh-s-Daughter-Quite-sweet&goto=newpost).