Need personal opinions PLS... esp fr men

[nippspinky]

had sex with my boyfriend the other day and realized that he took longer to come and came lesser than usual. basically from normally puddles, to just drops. during tt week, hes also had a new job. asked if he masturbated before we had sex and he said no. and that change in enviroment and stress probably caused this. i find it really hard to believe. men, i dont think stress can change the volume of sperm so drastically? yes or no? am i right or should i just believe what he says?

masturbation isnt a problem for me but lying is. we have had issues before whereby for some reason, he refuses to tell me the truth even tho i have caught him porning. i prefer him to be open and honest with me like i have with him.

how do i come about helping him be more open with me? ive tried many ways and all failed. ive even bought him porn mag to show how open i am. we have been together for 4 years now. leaving him is not an option because he is a good man. its only this area that i have an issue with. he said that i should stop thinking that hes doing bad stuff to me and tt i should let go. i would let go if he can be open and honest with me. i see dishonesty as doing bad things to me. are there any men out there whom simply refuse to tell their other half the truth regardless?

the lying really hurts. not the masturbation nor the porn.

[175569]

had sex with my boyfriend the other day and realized that he took longer to come and came lesser than usual. basically from normally puddles, to just drops. during tt week, hes also had a new job. asked if he masturbated before we had sex and he said no. and that change in enviroment and stress probably caused this. i find it really hard to believe. men, i dont think stress can change the volume of sperm so drastically? yes or no? am i right or should i just believe what he says?

masturbation isnt a problem for me but lying is. we have had issues before whereby for some reason, he refuses to tell me the truth even tho i have caught him porning. i prefer him to be open and honest with me like i have with him.

how do i come about helping him be more open with me? ive tried many ways and all failed. ive even bought him porn mag to show how open i am. we have been together for 4 years now. leaving him is not an option because he is a good man. its only this area that i have an issue with. he said that i should stop thinking that hes doing bad stuff to me and tt i should let go. i would let go if he can be open and honest with me. i see dishonesty as doing bad things to me. are there any men out there whom simply refuse to tell their other half the truth regardless?

the lying really hurts. not the masturbation nor the porn.

Totally agree with you....masturbation is common among men..the volume of sperm getting less..mean either masturbation or flirting...nothing to do with stress.

[BoinKING]

4 years being together really dulls the sex life.

unless either one got some new kungfu to try.. but if its SOP then boring liao hence the masturbation.

then again if you know its some man to hand action, is it really that bad if he wants to keep it private?

[autoroam]

If "leaving him is not an option because he is a good man" then don't bother to dig deeper..... You might not want to hear the truth..... Babe

Close 1 eye or better both eyes.... haha:D

[ddog]

Poor thing. You must have gone through a mental roller coaster having been hit by such lies.

As must as I would side men, I've to say that if he can lie, he'd prob lie to you again. But then look at the bright side, if he lies in such manner can only mean you of you are not too open abt the topic of mastubation, porn, etc and perhaps the problem is with you also.

Ask yourself, do you think of him watching porn, etc is wrong? If so then he'd prob lie to you abt actually watching it. No harm. When a man tells you there's nothing to worry, more often than not, it's direct.

Obviously there's something that he's hiding. Who knows, maybe a fetish that he's mastubating with.... like porn, fav pornstar, sexy colleague or maybe like some bros here might like: masturbate to office lady's shoes, sanitary pads, clothing at his workplace... and too shy to admit.

But all in all something tells me if you can accept it, he's not likely to cheat on you, as his word implies. I know because I'm looking into myself and asking the same question and good honest answer as a guy.

[doomday123]

Sex is just part of life but what most important is that he love you & you had already said "he is a good man".

[nippspinky]

boinking, this has nothing to do with oursexlife. if you read carefully,the prob here is not about the porn NOR the wanking.

autoroam, thats not the way to solve issues by closing eyes. if it bothers you, it will 10 years fr now. running away and not fixing things will only cause bigger issues in time.

doomday, yeah he does just not enough to atleast be honest with me.

[ddjonge]

Actually, yes, stress can affect sexual performance and libido. There are lots of factors to consider and you shouldn't jump to conclusions that just because he isn't as hard or cum as much, there is some monkey business going on elsewhere, whether it be with his hand or someone else.

As one of the other guys said earlier as well, 4 years is a fairly long time to be with someone, especially in this day and age, and it can dull the sex life somewhat. Try spicing it up with some role play and spontaneity. If you keep questioning a guy about something he isn't all too proud or ready to share with you, you are just expanding the divide, so my advise to you is just take a step back and make things a bit more interesting than they already are.

[Crazyfowl]

The truth always hurts,,, Give him some free sapce & privacy and that's the way to maintain the relationship, if you continue to probe further you may find the answer but do you really want it? What if the answer is going to hurt you???
Take the other bros advise,,close one eye
:(:(:(

[nippspinky]

The truth always hurts,,, Give him some free sapce & privacy and that's the way to maintain the relationship, if you continue to probe further you may find the answer but do you really want it? What if the answer is going to hurt you???
Take the other bros advise,,close one eye
:(:(:(

to be honest i dont wanna dig for answers. i just want honesty. i dont ask like very day do you wank do did you wank etc. i only ask when - like mentioned, in a particular moment.

[Xgenre]

Totally agree with you....masturbation is common among men..the volume of sperm getting less..mean either masturbation or flirting...nothing to do with stress.

You should learn to think before you talk. Don't stir shit to try into a girl's pants and damage people's relationships as a result. Nothing better to say, then keep your mouth shut.

men, i dont think stress can change the volume of sperm so drastically? yes or no? am i right or should i just believe what he says?

how do i come about helping him be more open with me? ive tried many ways and all failed. ive even bought him porn mag to show how open i am. we have been together for 4 years now. leaving him is not an option because he is a good man. its only this area that i have an issue with. he said that i should stop thinking that hes doing bad stuff to me and tt i should let go. i would let go if he can be open and honest with me. i see dishonesty as doing bad things to me. are there any men out there whom simply refuse to tell their other half the truth regardless?

the lying really hurts. not the masturbation nor the porn.

Stress is a known performance inhibitor in sex for guys. In fact, some guys are so stressed they don't wish to have sex or can't perform during sex. You know he has started a new job. He won't have so much free time. He may also be stressed from new colleagues and a new working culture. The more demands you throw on him, the worse he will perform in bed. As guys grow older, sperm volume does drop.

Seriously, I don't think he lies. I think YOU are a big problem. You have lofty, unrealistic expectations. You want guys to give you a min amount of sperm guarantee ah? Cum must have 5ml, if not you are cheating on me or masterbating behind my back! Get real. He cums lesser, you re-examine a 4 year relationship??? You need some brain supplements. I recommend you let him CIM and you swallow his protein. Won't harm that brain of yours for sure...

Just because he loves you doesn't mean he don't treasure his privacy. Guys will surf porn and masterbate even if the sex is good. What do you expect him to do? Tell you 'Honey, you watch TV while I go toilet to masterbate ok?'. Even if you can accept that, it doesn't mean he likes saying that. Buying porn for him doesn't show him that you are open-minded. Buying porn for him shows YOURSELF that you are open-minded. If you are open-minded, you won't even probe what he does behind your back. If you say it doesn't bother you, why are you even here? WALK THE TALK LAH! You aren't open-minded. In fact, you are narrow-minded.

You are a control freak and he's right in asking you not to always think the worst of him and to give him the space he desires. 4 years is a long time for both parties. Be fair to him. Grow up, don't just grow old.

[V123]

guys sometimes are shy to admit that they are masturbating. Even the partner said she is fine with that, jsut be honest, the guy might have reservations about admiting. What if the gal get angry after he get honest abt his masturabation. the gal might end up angry at him and accused him that he does not like sex with her, and dun like her sex skill blah blah. so he afraid to admit to cause another set of misunderstanding or agruments.

just let it be!

[black_ops7]

Hi Sis, I'm in my 40s and hv been married for 20yrs+ allow me to share my humble opinion.

Men do still mastrubate regardless whether is he single or attached, we are humans after all. The urge to masturbate vs the urge to have sex comes differently. If he really does masturbate and denied, i would deem this is a white lie. A lie not wanting his other half feels that she is not up to his sex standard, hence self-help comes into play. I might be wrong, but most woman will think or feel this way.

Alternatively, if the truth that he really didn't masturbate before sex, then there is possibility that he's flirting behind your back.

Now, if you really want to dig further just to satifsfy your doubts, I would reckon that denial of the latter willl be his answer. So, what do you gain from this? Hence, my advise will be the same like what Bro here have advised... "...close one eye or both.....".

I can't speak much for your sex life, but for 4 years of relationship and if your sex patterns are the same routine (red-flag is over) style (strip, shower, 5mins sex with spread/doggie, cum) or whatsoever, it's going to be dull for anyone.

You can try to find ways to improve this to entice both appetite BUT I can't gurantee it will help.

Lastly, a few No-No things to do after sex is to ask the other half:
1. Honey, did you enjoy your climax?
2. Honey, am I good in sex?
3. Honey, how much your cum is so less compare last time......

Sis, i hope this might helps.
Bros, just my humble opinion, don't zap me hor.......

[orchideous]

Completely in agreement with bro Xgenre.

What's wrong with masturbating anyway? If that's the case then women also not allowed to masturbate if they have bf?

From what I've experienced, yes, stress does affect. But your bf doesn't owe you any explanation for how much cum he has. You are just being unreasonable and picking a fight with him.

[randyboy73]

Dear TS,

Let's start with the stress part.

I can relate very well to the fact that stress really kills the urge for sex, so there is every possibility that the lack of a libido is purely down to that factor and not because he is cheating on you.

Have you asked him to do a full body checkup? Maybe a blood pressure test and the blahblah blah? Is he having migraines or backaches? All these things contribute greatly to the stress levels and also hinder the interest in sex.

On to the relationship and mental part....

I presume you have tried having variations to spice up your sex life together, right? I know some folks go for kinky stuff, some try swinging to add variety, some decide to go on romantic holidays....

I know this is side tracking, but you may want to consider this point. I used to be in a married relationship where I was having no sex at home but still loved my wife..well at least I thought I did. With her, the idea of sex never crossed my mind. I felt that we were very connected and got along so well... to the point I start to think I am either weird or she and I were more like soul mates than anything else....

BAck to the subject matter, I think it is not about buying porn mags and showing him you are open. Putting pressure on him is going to make things even worse for him and he will more likely retreat into his shell. show your openess during sex with him. try new things.... sometimes cuddling is a good way to start making a difference.

SOrry if I am repeating what you already know.. just trying to be helpful.

rb73

[chinchiahoe]

Well said Bro Xgenre, stress definitely does affect. There could be other factors as well like, lack of sleep, etc...But whatever the case may be, Sis TS, don't judge him just because of a 1 off incident. If he really stray, I'm sure there will be other tell-tale signs in his daily behavior. Trust is paramount in a relationship. I learned it the hard way. I ended a nearly 8yrs relationship due to lack of trust. Besides trust, I personally feels personal privacy is equally important too. Everyone or at least every man has a dark side of him that he does not want others to know. It can be from an addiction to musturbation or maybe a fetish to woman's stocking, bra or panty. I'm sure most man will not want his other half to know of this habit, and your boyfriend is no exception. If he just saw a downblouse or an upskirt on his way back from work and he went into a public toilet to wank, you expect him to be honest with you? I think few ladies can get such honesty from her man. Many of us may even like to bring this secret to our graves. Give each other some space to breathe. Don't give him a death sentence just because he came lesser than usual.....Just my own personal opinion. Not intended to offend anyone.

[RealEstateGuy]

Sister, what you need to do is what I do on women I date. Basically withhold sex until they can't stand it anymore. Then rock their world by f their brains out.

[nuclearkid]

nippspinky, if you are gonna be up his ass all the time over such matters, am afraid you will not get him to open up more than he already has. Its just gonna spin into a vicious cycle. Wanting him to open up is your desire but the outcome, his choice. I do not know of any men who is totally transparent to their other half. Some issues simply open up a can of worms, much prefer what-she-doesn't-know-doesn't-hurt. Psychologically, blokes think differently. You have to accept that and not enforce your will on him.

I had an ex who was a pain in the ass with an artist's impression of how a relationship should be. Fuck her (I didn't literally screw her, she's a virgin and I don't touch virgins), I prefer to lead my life on common shared grounds, not one dictated by her. If you are gonna start harping on such matters, be prepared to breach his limit sooner rather than later. Then we watch the fireworks.

[Sexy Under]

4 years relationship he every time shoot the same quantity??

To be fair to him, are you totally honest with him without a single lie?

Even husband and wife also have secrets and need private space.

At the rate you are pushing, you may not want to lose him but he may soon want to lose you. :rolleyes:

[sean69]

trust me.. stop probing

nothing turns off or irritate a man more than a woman who keeps digging and probing... if he wants to tell you what happen, he will tell you.

but some men prefers to keep to themselves, they are just not comfortable telling you that they masturbate.. it could be the upbringing or whatever, they just dun like to share..

if you trust him, just accept the situation...

if you keep probing, you may need to accept that he will breakoff with you..

just my 2cents worth...

[arsenal_84]

lower stock take does not necessary means he's having fun elsewhere...try seducing him and the volume should go back as per normal.

[175569]

I don't agree with bro.arsenal 84... I remember my friend once told me.. When having sex, his wife will know whether her husband have affair -- based on the volume of the sperm..If we had sex everyday..the volume of sperm be less..if one week...the volume be normal.... That i agreed...

[arsenal_84]

loss of interest and stress also can result in lower volume.
stress especially is a rather dominant factor.
i ever IA before during the 2nd round, just because i thought of my work for a moment...damn.

[bochapsing]

Seriously, I don't think he lies. I think YOU are a big problem. You have lofty, unrealistic expectations. You want guys to give you a min amount of sperm guarantee ah? Cum must have 5ml, if not you are cheating on me or masterbating behind my back! Get real. He cums lesser, you re-examine a 4 year relationship??? ...

totally agree with bro xgene...

it's sad for TS's bf tat their 4-yr relationship not based on trust, but on the volume of cum?!

TS, can u imagine wat will b yr reaction if ur bf judge ur honesty / faithfulness by the volumn of ur moan or the amount of ur cum juice? i think if tat happens, u will still be blaming ur bf for not putting in enuf effort or not interested in making love with u and come in here to ask the same question again...

i think problem lies with TS... TS should stop thinking only of "I", "ME", "MY", "MYSELF"...

[happywoody]

dear TS, firstly, u're obsessed in why the volume of ejaculate has dropped.

in yr mind, if he didn't wank off, he must've deposited his load somewhere pretty recently. or maybe it's stress fr the new job.

all 3 are possible scenarios. and do consider a few more. maybe it was a lousy session you guys had. maybe he was thinking of his football team. maybe, maybe.

so how now?

i've yet to come to the wisdom of total honesty ~ because it's humanly impossible imho. you 2 would need to be in a relationship which is free of emotion and passion to be totally honest.

just a question, are you so open you told him you signed up with sbf to seek answers?

cut yr man some slack sis if u're serious abt keeping the relationship. good luck ;)

[hundredson]

Lucky you are not my wife or girl friend, if not i sure dump you . :p

If you insists on knowing, suggest you go and buy a weighing scale and weigh the sperms he release everytime ,

if missing a bit then you can shoot all your questions at him :p

[Xgenre]

Oh just to add dear sister... you better pray your nipples don't turn from pink to black or that your vagina don't turn black over time. Some guys here do mind. We take it as a sign of heavy usage. Outside got men suck your nipples is it? Right guys? If I don't have enough sperm, I rest and let mother nature top up my tank. If your vital organs change from pink to black, our faces will turn black too. :cool: See how you explain. I want complete openness! Haha...

Why so little sperm? <-------> Why your nipple black?

Why you masterbate? <------> Why your pussy black?

Who you fuck outside? <------> Who fuck you outside?

[Reoxy]

Men will continue to masturbate until they cannot erect. I am a man, thus I know.

Men in a relationship will still want to masterbate. However, he may not want his partner to know because it is EMBARESSING. I am married, thus I know.

My wife keeps asking me until I dulan then I admit.

Do you want to make your boyfriend who is a good man DULAN?

Then DON'T ASK!

[naturegreen]

the lying really hurts. not the masturbation nor the porn.

The lying hurts? Well let me tell ya this little girl. The truth hurts even more. ;)

Tell him this
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uelHwf8o7_U&feature=player_embedded

[MuffDiver69]

hahaha.... not enough sperm also kena questioned, if too tired to erect sure kena questioned even worse.

if you are really open, you wouldn't buy him porn, you'll film yourself DIY and show it to him. or watch porn together.

even if he is wanking and telling you no, he is either trying to last longer to pleasure you more or your libido is low and he doesn't want you to know that you are lagging. you should be happy about it and not question his good intentions.

now go iron his shirt and doll up yourself to pamper him tonight for being so understanding.

[Criminalz]

He is seeing someone else.

[freezetheDB]

a good blowjob will spice up any relationship

[bigfat]

Totally agree with you....masturbation is common among men..the volume of sperm getting less..mean either masturbation or flirting...nothing to do with stress.

totally agree with u!!!! maybe he too stress den he ly to u!!!

[whizzer24]

I agree w bro Xgenre too. Although, bro, don't be so harsh on TS lah... i think she is just a little gal that need more knowledge on guys er..er... "reproductive system" haha...

On a serious note however... I think Ms "pinky nipple" u really should know and understand that "stress" to a certain level does affect sperm count in our guy body. However, the word "stress" is really subjective.. simply put, for some of our "sexual powered" bros here, no amt of stress is going to affect them, haha..but to others like me, sad to admit.. i have such problem. There are time when I was in my previous job, I even have problem getting erection simply beside my mind is really too burnt out to even think of having sex. u may laugh at me or don't believe me... but that's truth in my case. :)

Therefore, I'm just wondering...u mentioned he is a good man and u don't want to lose him...sad to say, from a neutral point of view...it come across to us guys that u r finding fault to call it quit... whether I'm right to say that or not, it doesn't matter. What really matter is if u r willing go through thick and thin with ur guy. I mean I will be very touch if my gal r been understanding to my lacking..( which sound funny in this case as lack of sperm..lolz) instead of digging for "why"...even if i'm lying, i will be guilty and love her even more... at least i think that's wht most guys will react. ^.^

hope it help. :)

[ahsongyy]

stress can really make a man cum lesser

[glster]

Totally agree with you....masturbation is common among men..the volume of sperm getting less..mean either masturbation or flirting...nothing to do with stress.

go and do some read up 1st before you comment. stress can affect ones usual sex life and its proven for some but off cause not all also depends on stress level and how well he cope. to be frank masturbation is common for guy even gers. lady he can be stress or maybe he even masturbate but to be discreet(privacy) or he dont wanna hurt u, as why he rather mast then sex with u

[Dhornyboy]

Stress can cause men to perform badly.

Really, imagine he is having problem with work/datelines.. and while fucking .. all he can think of is quickly end .. then by the time he comes.. half fuck job..

Happens to all men.

And if its a long term relationship, he might need new stuff to stimulate la.. cos everytime same pattern.. sian one.. i am sure girls also will be sick and tired of a man without creativity.

[squirtator]

Its just a drop in sperm quantity. no need to think too much

give the guy some space la

[GreenHorn55]

had sex with my boyfriend the other day and realized that he took longer to come and came lesser than usual. basically from normally puddles, to just drops. during tt week, hes also had a new job. asked if he masturbated before we had sex and he said no. and that change in enviroment and stress probably caused this. i find it really hard to believe. men, i dont think stress can change the volume of sperm so drastically? yes or no? am i right or should i just believe what he says?

masturbation isnt a problem for me but lying is. we have had issues before whereby for some reason, he refuses to tell me the truth even tho i have caught him porning. i prefer him to be open and honest with me like i have with him.

how do i come about helping him be more open with me? ive tried many ways and all failed. ive even bought him porn mag to show how open i am. we have been together for 4 years now. leaving him is not an option because he is a good man. its only this area that i have an issue with. he said that i should stop thinking that hes doing bad stuff to me and tt i should let go. i would let go if he can be open and honest with me. i see dishonesty as doing bad things to me. are there any men out there whom simply refuse to tell their other half the truth regardless?

the lying really hurts. not the masturbation nor the porn.
Hi Nippspinky,

1st of all from what u describe the situation, i believe it might be due to the sexual intercourse was unable to meet his wants... Just met his needs only..

Needs mean having sex & to penetrate.
Wants mean wanted a difference feeling or high from
the sex.

I ever had similar feelings as ur bf years ago.

pls up my point if my words are valid..thks

[TheGreatOne]

you should be glad he actually managed an erection with you knowing that you will grilled him non stop on pcc or whatever your imagination is going to bring you.

if he pcc, so be it.

do you feel humiliated that he rather pcc than ramming you? cos you're shallow if you feel so. Sometimes men just need quality time on their own.

[cheapthriller]

My humble opinion is that everyone needs their own private space therefore if you are deemed to have intruded into his private space, he may tend to be more defensive about his action. If you are pretty confident that he is not fooling around behind your back, just give him that little personal space of his own. Let him wank for all he wants and it does not mean that you are unable to meet his sexpectations. Like I mention, it is his his-time to spend with his lil bro.

[yang punk]

TS...what makes you think he is not telling you the truth? Must his answers always suit you before you believe him?

If you are so suspicious towards him for a small matter like that what make you think your marriage with him will be happy?

There are more important things in life than whether he masturbated and wanted to keep it from you. He could have a wet dream the night before and is too embarrassed to tell you.

[maxpee88]

Dear ThreadStarter

Xgenre has posted the most relevant answers for you. Let me share my 2 cents worth

I am in my mid 40s. I used to date a girl exactly like you. In fact I was going o marry her... Until i also faced the same question one night.

She wanted to see my condom and see how much ml of sperm I shoot out.
To me that was a turned off. It was as if she had to check and question every thing I did. I as a man felt insulted. This always happened whenever i returned from a business trip. There was a few times I just was stressed and couldnt come and my thoughts wandered to these things she did to me and my dick went limp. She like you, will question every thing.. Girls like you dont understand that men like us sometimes like to have some privacy but it doesnt mean we are cheating you. The more you ask, the more lies we tell because we simply guard our own privacy. Who are you to judge us just because you alone are willing to share your privacy, so just dont force that on your partner.

Of course I dumped her in the end. The last straw was that she hired some PI to track me.. Too bad. that made me dump her. I ended up marrying some one else. Last I heard, she married some poor sucker who doesnt know her shit until they got married. I heard he is quite upset and pissed as she subjected him to the same thing. One of my friend is his friend too and through him, I was only helping him to protect himself.

Its too bad that women like yourself is just screwing up your own life. have you asked yourself, why is it ALWAYS that WOMEN have to be the one to fight with men? What is it ALWAYS that the men has to say sorry? ... need I say more...?

Intelligent men never want to win an argument. To us, we have only 2 choice. Wanna win an argument or want to be happy? We just chose the latter. Most times, we tida apa you, because we feel life is too short to be pight and upset over small shit.

Take my advice, If you love him, give him a break. Stop pestering him and asking him and YES - you are just emotionally blackmailing him with your 'so called 'openness in sharing and porn stuff etc..".

[Sirrus]

sperm count do decrease with age or stress

or feeling unhealthy or bad diet.

does he smoke?
is he having enough sleep?
does he seems to be in a bad mood?

[Alf1977]

TS, u r funny! Can i ask if you measure your blood lost during each period??

[deep6161]

hi Nippspinky,

My thoughts
1)Stress can make less sperm , cos u want to finish faster and cum faster and less sperm.. But if you take long time to come and still less sperm then cannot be stress all of a sudden..

2) From above point I say it is either masturbation or flirting

a) Masturbation :- If due to masturbation, u shud be happy. Bcos he might hve done it for variety ( instead of flirting he chose mastrbation ). Also watching porn make man wanting more sex and excited.. It is good for good sex in fact.. most men don wan to agree to his gf that he does masturbate

b)Flirting :- 99% men (am i wrong ?) do a bit flirting atleast .. if it is occasoinal then just take it as his basic love for variety. But its ur choice how to deal with it..

conclusion - nvr try to dig abt masturbation and watching porn..cos men ARE after all MEN :D

[naturegreen]

hi Nippspinky,

My thoughts
1)Stress can make less sperm , cos u want to finish faster and cum faster and less sperm.. But if you take long time to come and still less sperm then cannot be stress all of a sudden..

conclusion - nvr try to dig abt masturbation and watching porn..cos men ARE after all MEN :D

I agree with these. Stress can really make a man lose the capability to perform since his mind will be on the things that he is stressed on which makes him to fail to be aroused mentally. It's the same for a woman when you just don't have the mood. Get it?

Regarding masturbation and watching porn, I just don't understand why some ladies mind so much that their partners watch porn/masturbate. They feel it's a form of betrayal. Do you prefer them to DIY when they have needs and when you are not around or prefer them to go look around for other girls? :rolleyes:

[Krazzie]

For those who have never feel stressed at work before ... you have a good life. For those who have never feel so stressed at work before till it affected your sex life... keep it that way cause the other way really sucks.

To TS. The problem does not lie with your boyfriend at all. The problem lies with you. Irregardless of what he did before, if he said something and you don't believe it and continue to probe and dig.

Unless you caught him red-handed with his hand around his penis don't go assuming things and accusing things and thinking of all kinds of scenarios. Try thinking from his point of view, do you want your lover to keep accusing you of something you never did?

Bottomline.
1. Stress really kills interest in sex for guys, hard to believe but very true and very possible.
2. TS should look into herself and understand where the problem lies. Learn to trust as it is the basis of any healthy relationship or if you can't then you should examine whether you should even be in the relationship.

[EtherC]

Human beings are by nature polygynous (the practice of males mating with multiple females), accept this fact and life will be easier. If your partner bothers to lie to you, he still cares. Marriage is largely a social control measure, to give it more "oomph" divine intervention was added and thereby the "sanctity of marriage" came into being. If it was truly that holy, you will see angels smiting all our divorcees.

Hence when you come to realise that marriage is just a legal binding contract to wed 2 people into a lifelong partnership with any child begotten from it having a legal status in society for inheritance, you'll come to terms with the fact that it has a business like quality. If it has a business like quality, you'll want to treat each other with respect and accept the differences between you & your partner. Even married couples need some privacy all the more so now that you are just in a stable boy girl relationship, so if he masturbates it's well within his right to do so.

Be careful about chasing truths, if you come to discover something you can't accept by principle it will destroy your relationship. So weigh it out, is love and partnership more important or are your principles more important. If you consider lying such a terrible breach of trust, ask yourself have you ever lied before? Not even a white lie?

Be realistic and practical. The warped feminist thought about equality in all aspects is erroneous. Men and women are built differently we have different biological impulses that are part of our natural self, by trying to force this Monogamy Clamp onto men, not only are you working against nature you are wasting your effort unless your guy is one of the rarer men with lower sex drive that is happy having sexual relationship with 1 woman or you're one hell of a sex bunny that can satisfy his various fantasies and keep him milked dry.

Happiness is always within your grasp, work with Nature not against it. It's not that difficult to keep your boyfriend wrapped around your little finger with some seduction techniques. You'll just have to find time to learn how to do it. Start off with the trusty Kamasutra, there must be a good reason for it to survive so many generations right? Good luck TS!

[nullnullnull]

Totally agree with you....masturbation is common among men..the volume of sperm getting less..mean either masturbation or flirting...nothing to do with stress.

I have a tendency to masturbate more when I'm stressed :P :P

I think the truth behind this could be in the male genetics.. I read somewhere that we are not designed to boink the same girl over and over again.. But I'm getting old so can't remember correctly~

Its something like a uglier girl you've never boinked before is more attractive then a girl you've boinked 100 times already?

[Toyota Honda]

had sex with my boyfriend the other day and realized that he took longer to come and came lesser than usual. basically from normally puddles, to just drops. during tt week, hes also had a new job. asked if he masturbated before we had sex and he said no. and that change in enviroment and stress probably caused this. i find it really hard to believe. men, i dont think stress can change the volume of sperm so drastically? yes or no? am i right or should i just believe what he says?


Well, I faced this couple of years ago when I was with my ex for like almost 5 years.

Sex is good, she is still the girl with the body I want and love to do her. And yes, its seems like she also love to see me cum huge loads on her after the whole deed. And she would sometimes comment on the texture and volume. As far as I know, even if I have diy-ing before doing her, it will not be to the extent of just drips. Watery maybe.

Or maybe its his health issues? I remember there once when I got kidney stones. It sort of affected my performance and the texture quite drastically. My load can come out watery the 1st night and gooey thick the next. and even slight green in colour. Sorrry for beng gross, but I am trying quite hard to defend TS bf.

[xiaosiami]

The problem lies with you TS.

If you don't trust him, anything he said you also won't believe. Even if he admit that he masturbated, you'll probably also have doubt.

So if later due to stress, he too tired to have sex or have problems sustaining his erection, are you gonna ask him whether he masturbated or 'eaten' outside or even lose interest in you?

One time maybe a freak accident, two times maybe a coincidence, more than that that you can start to suspect.

But then again If you don't learn to curb this wanting to know everything mentality, you only end up wrecking your own happiness. And seriously is there a need to know everything?