no feelings

[bonker81]

i have been in a relationship with my gf for coming 5 years.
it has already been over a year that we last had sex and i feel that the physical attraction i have for her is not there anymore. what should i do?

[liberatte]

:DBro,

2 Choices.
1. Marry her
2. Leave her

Anyway, go for a vacation... then talk about it...

[chucky69]

Two weeks without feelings or sex is enough signs that the relationship is OVER!!!!!!!
Why are you still procrastinating????? Move ON.

[xyhan]

i have been in a relationship with my gf for coming 5 years.
it has already been over a year that we last had sex and i feel that the physical attraction i have for her is not there anymore. what should i do?

Brother,

I think that the two of you should sit down and have a heart to heart talk on what's happening to your relationship? Ask her if she feels the same way as you about having SEX....Be it sexual or feelings wise...


Talk to each other frankly and see how you can re-start your relationship again... Perhaps you should try some new " style " or " methods " of Making Love instead of just having SEX..

Perhaps you can bring her for a vacation and for once MAKE LOVE just like when you both first met instead of just having SEX... There's a difference in Making Love with the one you love and just having SEX with the one you love.. Think about what I have just say and I hope that you will see the difference...

Being in a relationship for so long time doesn't come easy,, if you both still love each other, so please treasure it not just for the sake of having SEX.

If you carry on like this, I am sorry to say that you will be More Sorry when it is too late.


Good Luck... Have a Happy Life together.


Cheers

[NetRodent]

i have been in a relationship with my gf for coming 5 years.
it has already been over a year that we last had sex and i feel that the physical attraction i have for her is not there anymore. what should i do?

Well.. a relationship is not just about physical attraction.
Beauty of any girl would not last indefinitely.

In most case, a relationship is depended on mutual acceptance of each other, feel comfortable about each other together, u like the company, compatible personality and of coz, sexual enjoyment (with could improve over time).

To achieve lasting relationship, there is bound to be compromise, give and take. Nothing is perfect made for each other.

[unsung80]

Ask yourself do you still love her? Is time both of your sit down to have a talk. Some of the bros here have provide valid points for you to work on. Wish you all the best bro.

[Miyanaga]

TS.

Have you been visiting pros or doing FBs ? Maybe you have lost interest becos of this

[bonker81]

thanks guys for the advice.
its the feeling i guess... its not as it used to be anymore.

[hornyhead]

get new gf bro,or maybe invite me to fuck ur gf while u watch,perhaps that will help yu to love her again

[bus72]

Maybe u didnt treat her well i guess? bring her to movie, scroll in park, go night club etc i think :)

[myhobby]

once the feeling is gone, it's gone.....

[S.B.Y]

When it comes to a stage of your life like Pak P (64) physical action is not the No. 1 list :o

[Torch_Man]

its part n parcel of any relationship.
either u "go out" or "grow up" wif ur partner (sumtimes not an easy choice 2 make)

presumbly its not "no feeling" lah but rather "hangin in d middle air long time oredi". bro, pick up d courage n express ur real inner feelin.
SHORT PAIN IS BETTER THAN PROLONG SUFFERING,
although sense her out 1st, whether is she on d same tinkin as u??? then talk it over amicably


jz sharin onli

[bonker81]

get new gf bro,or maybe invite me to fuck ur gf while u watch,perhaps that will help yu to love her again

Wat sia...

[orneryjoe]

get new gf bro,or maybe invite me to fuck ur gf while u watch,perhaps that will help yu to love her again

Ha, ha.... an opportunist... always on the lookout for free bonks, aren't you? Ha, ha.

[my_preek]

am with my gf for 7 + years. I have the same problem you are facing. I feed out and have lost interest in home cooked food.

I feed on outside food regularly. I make it a point to make out with her for at least once a week.

The longest I didn't make with her is one and a half months. ( I also feel sian, but no choice ) Sometimes, even during foreplay, I can't even erect / erect fully !! Below are the few choices which you can try.

1. watch porno with her ( make urself erected then do the job )
2. finger her, listen and feel her wetness + porno ( it works for me )

Good girls are hard to come by, if you feel that she is the one whom you can trust and spend your life with, then start doing my suggestions. Feeding outside is a MUST but at the same time, make sure you still drink some soup from home too !

Good luck !

[maxman]

In the first 1-2 years of a new relationship, both men and women will experience feelings of love or being in love. This lovey-feeling is caused by a cocktail of chemicals (can't remember those chemical names) released by the brain.

This is similar to the feel-good hormones (oxytocin) that are released during good sex and orgasm. Chocolate apparently stimulates the release of such chemicals, and this is why some women love eating chocolates.

However, the bodily chemicals that cause such lovey-feelings eventually subside. By 2 years, it is very normal and expected that most couples won't feel the effects of being in love as they did when they dated and became a pair.

What keeps couples, married or not, going on together beyond 2 years is probably/possibly a realization that they are characteristically compatible with each other to spend the rest of their lives together. This realization is important since finding someone compatible to you and understands you is extremely difficult. The odds have been mathematically calculated to be something like 1:240,000 (if I remember correctly).

Some members here are quite right to propose somehow restarting the relationship. Couples can always "restart" the relationship or maintain the lovey-feeling by going out dating themselves again.

Take her out for a date, or go on a vacation. Consider a Batam/Bintan holiday.

I wouldn't suggest leaving her simply because the sex has become dull. Excitement in sex can be revived but it needs effort on both persons. I think the woman needs to put in more effort on this because their sex drive might become lowered or stagnant when in a stable relationship or in marriage (as you might notice the complaints of many married men.) The woman has to again make effort to dress sexy (as she had done in the past when dating men), behave seductively and engage in some pornographic act to rekindle the sexual excitement.

However, as expected, there will be women who cry out "yee... disgusting".

[keano]

personally i think this is a very good thread. Broken marriages and less babies are the common phrases in SG now! What some of bros say are quite good and i suppose experiences you guys shared in this phrase of period in a r/s or marriage is can be quite helpful for younger generations in SG!

Yeah abit too far off but i think Govt should do something like this for FOC. This is what a marriage counselor would advise(you got to pay for that thou)

Kudos for that really, i think i can learn from what you guys say too especially the "restart r/s and stuffs like compatibility issue"

thanks for that in a sunday morning :)

share more pls for the mankind in SG LOL

[ahit1]

Dear TS

How come you determind your GF by the interest of your sex with her and not by the inner beauty she had and the commitment she had with you?

If you really need new sex excitment, you can always go out and find FL to please you. The gf you have suppose to spend lifetime with you other than sex. If you are lucky, she is a good girl, better cherish her man.... Dun bother about how she satisfy you in bed, and throw away a relationship just like that. Better bother how she treat you as her bf and how to return her love back instead.

[freezetheDB]

TS, do think about one scenerio,

one day when you can no longer get it up, u want ur gf/wife to leave u because of that?

a r/s is more than physical needs, though it can be a big factor for some.

something to consider

[Super_Hooligan]

Apply the 5 mile rule. More than 5 miles from home is not considered cheating:D

[nuclearkid]

Hi TS, sorry to hear about your predicament. Married blokes like myself face the same problem as you but there are consequences to bear like kids and financial matters. At the moment, what you lose is pretty much just the time you have spent with her. But in return, you would have gained some valuable experience on what to look out for in the next one.

Only you will know if the spark can be rekindled and if you think its possible, work is waiting for you. However, if you are just going to walk into marriage thinking that it will turn things around, I hope you don't take this leap of faith. Personally seen people take the next step because its about time to settle down but they settled down into a monotonous marriage.

You are your own best judge, evaluate your way ahead rationally, emotions have to be kept in check as they cloud objectivity. Just my humble opinion: Hot sex on a long term basis is a myth to many of us. At a certain point in a relationship, other priorities take precedence. My schlong activity has been pretty much in decline after close to a decade with the same chick. Kid(s) and sex don't often mix well.

Apply the 5 mile rule. More than 5 miles from home is not considered cheating:D

Yo Super_Hooligan, this is freaking awesome. Where did you get this from? You think the ladies will buy it? Haha...

[orneryjoe]

On the average, you are lucky if your passion for your wife or girlfriend lasts 5 years. This is perfectly natural -- we are wired to feel this strong passion just long enough to make a baby and raise him up until his survival has more or less stabilised. That's evolution.

Beyond five years, if you are very lucky, passion turns into long term attachment. But the sex during this period tends to be less exciting, unless perhaps, both partners make extraordinary efforts to keep their love light burning. With one or two children in tow and with the pressures of working life, this is not very likely to happen.

And if the man happens to come across SBF and realises the huge variety available on tap, chances of clicking sexually with the wifey becomes even less. Ha, ha.

[303258]

Dude there are tons of methods to spice up things inbetween u 2,
search the net and put it to work.
Things had been interesting in the early stages of relationship because it had been new and spicy to u.
So find ways to have the same or smilar feelings.

hope U guys stay. Pls don't leave someone for sexual reasons

[Super_Hooligan]

Yo Super_Hooligan, this is freaking awesome. Where did you get this from? You think the ladies will buy it? Haha...


No my friend, 2nd part of the 5 mile rule is that women are not allowed to know about the 5 mile rule!:D